Chapter-33: To Exist...?

Mujhe laga ki mere sath Jo Abhi ho raha hai ya Abhi Jo ho raha hai… both are same , use main feel and describe dono kar sakta hoon. Mujhe laga ki marte waqt wo past, present ka combine hona mahaj purane logo ki dakiyanusi baate hai par Ab Jo mere sath ho raha hai ya Jo Ab mere sath ho raha hai use main sirf feel kar sakta tha, describe nahi… 
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and for that I want to tell you, I’m sorry. That was wrong of me. I hope you can forgive me. beacuase now, From one way I am seeing nothing but from another way I am seeing everything. I even know how shall I meet Angelina. It’s all…all double dutch to me. I’m sorry for this… for my failure to describe my current situation and scenario and for that I’d like to apologize again but I promise I’ll do it next time.

“stop it now, you’ve described enough…”

“tu kaun hai be…”

“please don’t tell me, you cant recognize your own face… anyway I have to collect more versions of you then I’ll combine them. I must be going. you’re in transition phase… take it easy”

“what the hell that supposed to mean…”

“please, don’t act like normal persons…”

“I am a normal person…”

“no… you’re not”

“sun be… ek toh waise bhi samajh nahi aa raha ki main zinda hoon ya tapak gaya hoon, upar se tu dimag me lund ghusa raha hai… chup-chap khisak le nahi toh main tere gand bomb fod dunga”

“more flashbacks and flash-forwards are coming… take it easy…”

“take it easy ? abey madarchod… kyun dimag kharab kar raha hai bhai.. please ja na….. nahi toh main teri dayi chod dunga”(yadi maal hui toh) 
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Aur thik mere jaise dikhne wale ke jaane ke baad mujhe phhir se dikhayi dena band ho gaya aur………………

“papa ko mat batana please, Nikki bhaiya… warna jab ghar jaunga toh mera baap mera khoon kar dega…”ek ladka lagbhag gidgidate hue kisi se bola… 

Main aur Arun hamesha ki tarah college shuru hone ke pahle yani college khatam hone ke baad Cigarette peene apni udhari wali dukan par pahuche hee the ki… dekha ki mera…mera koyi junior, kisi se gidgida kar uske baap se kuch na batane ki vinati kar raha tha… ye unka family matter tha, isliye maine ispar jyada dhyan nahi diya aur dukan wale se bola…

“do Marlboro do…”

“paisa…”

“arey police ka launda khada hai mere bagal me… ekdum corrupt police… matlab gand-fatat le ghus khata hai Arun ka baap… ye do Marlboro kya do sau Marlboro ka paisa de dega…”

“lawde, baap se majak nahi…”

“bol de ki tera baap aaj tak paisa nahi khaya hai…”

“kya hai be… do cigarette ke liye sabke saamne mere baap ki bezzati kar raha hai… main tere baap ki bezzati karu toh tujhe kaisa lagega…”

“kar de… infact main toh kahta hoon ki mere baap ke sath-sath meri maa ki bhi bezzati kar de…”

“kash ki tera baap us din mutth mar liya hota… toh tera janam hee nahi hota”dukan wale ko paisa dekar Arun ne kaha…

“mera janam nahi hua, mera avatar hua hai…”

Mere ye kahte hee dukan wala hasne laga aur mujhse puchha ki mujhe aur kya chahiye….

“do beedi de…”

“beedi…? Maine toh tujhe beedi peete nahi dekha…”

“arey, wo raat me hostel ke kuch launde chhat pe ganja peete hai… main bhi abhi-kabhar chala jata hoon.. madarchod pahle din toh ekdum gand hee fat gayi… salo ne ekdum hari-hari patti todkar kuch ghanto sukhaya aur fir pila diya… tujhe pata hai, first year me first year hostel ke peechhe first time jise jhadi samajh kar hum dono waha mootne jaya karte the… waha darasal seniors ne ganja bokar rakha hua tha… kisi ko batana mat… ab bhi ganja ugate hai hostel ke launde”

“isme beedi ka kya role…”

“dekh jaise kisi ladki ko chodne se pahle humlog lubricant use karte hai na… taki mast, achchhe se chudayi ho… thik ganja me beedi ke tobacco ka bhi same role hai… matlab samjh ja ki muh choot hai, chilam… lund hai aur beedi lubricant… got it ? now give it…”

“please bhaiya… mat batana na papa ko… warna bapu danda daal dega pichhwade me…”hostel ke gate ke paas phhir gidgidate hue bola…

“Arun ye dono kaun hai be… Cigarette lene gaye tab bhi waha the aur yaha hostel ke gate ke paas” 

“ek apne college me padhta hai, dusara uske gaanv se aaya hua uska muhbola bada bhai hai… yaha uska muhbola bada bhai inspection pe aaya hai ki uska muhbola chhota bhai padhai kar raha hai ya humari tarah……………… anyway, toh uske muhbole bade bhai ne achanak uske room me entry mari toh room me daru ki botal dekh li… upar se pandey hokar non-veg vagerah kha liya bas yahi baat ye bahari launda bade Pandey ji ko batane wala hai…”

“tujhe kaise pata ye sab…”

“b-h-u…”

“humlog second year me hai kya…”

“what the…”

“yad aaya… ye toh Rajshri Pandey hai… mera fan. Sala maine imagination me isko kitna kharab dikhaya tha par reality me toh….. us-se bhi jyada kharab dikhta hai”

“please Nikku bhaiya… mat batana na.. samjho toh sahi… yad karo bachpan me aap jab nali me ball marte the toh main hee utha kar laya karta tha….”

“dekh Pandey.. tu kya karta hai, kaha marwata hai… in sabse mujhe koyi lena dena nahi… tere papa ne mujhpar bahut bharosa karke yaha bheja hai.. unhe ek-ek chiz ki exact detail chahiye… reality toh batani padti hai dost… phhiir chahe wo tere paksha me ho ya vipaksha me…”

“arey bol dena na ki… badhiya se rah raha hai hai, padhai-likhayi kar raha hai…”

“par ye reality nah hai aur reality toh sabko batani hee padti hai”

“reality me toh teri maa bhi chudi hai… toh kya ye baat bhi sabko batayega… nahi na. kyunki kuch realities ko bataya nahi chhipaya jata hai… baki main is baar kuch nahi bolunga… par yadi apne gaanv jakar bade Pandey ji se sab kuch sach-sach bata doge toh unka tujh par bharosha pakka ho jayega aur wo phhir se tujhe kuch mahine baad yaha bhejenge.... tab main tujjhe pelunga”

“bade-chhote ka lihaj nahi hai kya… main apne district me student org. ka head hoon… mujhse tu aisi baat kiya kaise….”mera gardan daboch kar Nikku..Nikki.. jo bhi uska name tha usne kaha…

“upar dekh, hostel ke board ke neeche kya likha hai…”

“kkkkyaaa… likha….hai……. jo yaha akadta hai, wo mera pakadta hai- ARMAN”

“Arman main hee hoon aur student org., students ko manage karne ke liye hote hai.. humlog jaanwar hai… jinko bas ek baar aawaz de do… iske baad wo ye bilkul nahi dekhte ki saamne kaun hai aur galti kiski hai… marna hai toh bas marna hee hai… yaha aisa hee hota aaya hai aur aage bhi aisa hoga.. bhool ke bhi next time kisi bhi student organization ke chamcho ko mat lana aur yadi galti se bhi Rajshri ki shikayat uske baap se ki na toh yaad rakhna next time teri maa ko tera baap nahi main chodunga……………. yadi maal hui toh, nahi toh phhir Rajshri Pandey hai hee aur mere college ke student org. ke members ke paas bilkul mat jana kyunki un sabko main last year hee pel chuka hoon… so, two options…. Lie or Die… choose wisely and act nicely…. chal nikal ab pranam karke..”
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“ye tune achchha nahi kiya…”Nikku ke waha se jane ke baad hostel ke ek ladke ne kaha…

“chal bhag be kanghichor…” jalti hui cigarette uske sar ke upar jhadkar maine kaha… 

“w..w..wo k.k.. koyi… mamooli ladka nah..nahi tha, jisko tu..tune chamkaya… wo Director se shikayat ka…ka…”

“ye kaun hai be… hakla…”

“De..De..Deeeee…. Deepak Bhagat…”

“sala, Chetan Bhagat ka bhai lagta hai… hat saamne se, warna muh ke sath-sath gand se bhi haklayega… tum jaise nagdo se toh Arman baat tak nahi karta”

Maine us hakle ko kinare kiya aur hostel me jaane laga ki tabhi Rajshri Pandey ne mujhse kaha…

“Arman bhai… aaj se apun aapka shagird… aaj aap jo bolo aapke liye hazir hai… ladki chahiye toh bolo abhi kothe pe chalte hai ya phhir daru… aaj hee 2000  aaye hai mere account me…”

“I love daru more than girls…”

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“Kya hai madarchod… 20 bf download kiya hoon… madarchod ek bhi aisa nahi hai jo dobara dekhne layak ho… dobara kya ek baar bhi nahi dekha ja raha… wahi fati bur.. wahi latke hue doodh… bf wale directors toh sale apne tv serials ke director se bhi gaye gujre hai bhosdiwale…”

“kya hua Arman bhai…”

“kuch nahi.. par tu kaha se aa raha hai be… aaj toh Sunday hai…”

“arey ek ladki se milne gaya tha… left side wala pyar ho gaya lagta hai us-se… chalo Arman bhai isi khushi me chhat par chalkar waha se guzarne wale local aur global logo ko gali dete hai…”

“chal be, main aisi chhichhori harkat nahi karta…”

“gali mat dena… sirf maje lena… gali toh apan juniors se dilwa lenge…”

“tu khud junior hai…”
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Main chhat par pahucha… toh dekha ki taqriban 15-20 ladke chhat pe is samay the… mujhe pata toh tha ki yaha kya hota hai, par is chiz ka itna craze….? Upar se beet-te waqt ke sath waha ladko ki sankhya bhi badh rahi thi aur thodi der baad mobile me achi-achi hardcore bf search karte hue Arun bhi waha aa pahucha…. Darasal humne 20 bf ekdum jhat type ki download ki thi iska jitna dukh mujhe tha, us-se kahi jyada dukh Arun ko tha… kyunki uski zindagi me bf ke aalawa tha bhi kya…

“Choda le….”hostel ki boundary se sate road par bike me ja rahe ek couple ko dekh kar Rajshri Pandey chillaya aur jaise hee us ladke ne bike roki Rajshri Pandey phhir chillaya… “kyun re randi, mere se bhi chudwa le… kya bade-bade pond hai tere… madarchod… apne baap ka number de, abhi tere baap ko phone lagata hoon…”

“madarchodo… behan hai wo meri… tumhari maa ka…”zameen se patthar uthakar us ladke ne hostel ki chhat ki taraf jor se feka… jise chiila-chot kar rahe juniors me se ek ne catch kar liya aur bola.. “tu sale jhooth bol raha hai, wo teri behan nahi hai pakka randi hai, uski gand dekhkar hee main samajh gaya tha… uski gand me do-do lund chale jayenge”

Us ladke ke paas waha se jaane ke aalawa koyi aur option nahi tha, mujhse chup-chap raha toh nahi ja raha tha, par maine phhir bhi kisi ko kuch nahi kaha… kyunki main ye janta tha ki yahi launde bina sahi-galat soche bas hostel ke naam se ladayi karne ko taiyar ho jate hai… 

Iske baad waha aise hee gali-galouch ka programme chalta raha, waha se jo bhi guzarta, bahut badtar aur bhayanak gali sunke jata… phhir wo bicycle par sawar chhota bachcha ho ya phhir koyi budha… hostel ke launde kisi ke sath koyi bhed-bhav nahi kar rahe the aur sabki maa-behan chod rahe the. jise dekhkar mujhe bahut kuch karne ka mann karta par main kaise bhi karke khud pe control kiye hue tha….

“abey oye… chocolate.. rook…”sadak par khelte-kudte ja rahe teen-bachcho k eek group ko rok-kar ek junior ne kaha… “madarchod… bhag yaha se nahi toh teri gand kaat dunga… bhag madarchod…”

“bachcha hai be…”mobile me bf search karte hue Arun ne kaha…

“arey koyi bachcha nahi hai Arun bhai… abhi konte me jakar mutth marega.. madarchodo, gaye nahi abhi tak… tum sabki mammi kaha bur fadwa rahi hai… ghar jakar apni maa se kahna ki…. Maa, choot dikhao na… yad kar lo lawdo… ghar jakar, apni maa se bolna ki…. Maa, choot dikhao na… ek baar bol ke batao toh kya bologe ?”

“Maa… choot dikhao na…”

“chalo jao fir aur jo bola hai zaroor bolna warna tum teeno ki maa ki gand kaat dalunga… hahaha… bhago madarchodo yaha se…”

“kya hai yar, fir se fati bur…”bf search karte hue Arun badbadaya… mujhe hostel ke ladko ka ye ravaiya dekhkar phhir se nahi raha gaya, par maine khud ko phhir se control kiya… 
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“oye, Pandey.. Oo dekh apna roj ka shikar…”

“roj ka shikar ? matlab…”maine pucha

“matlab ye roj apni biwi ke sath subah paas wali university me jata hai aur sham ko isi time wapas aata hai, sabse jyada gali toh humse isi ne khayi hai… dekhna sir, kaise iski gand fategi abhi…”bolkar us junior ne sadak par sath chal rahe ek mard aur ek aurat ko aawaz di…

“kyun re taklu-lal… aaj kaha choda is kutiya ko aur ye kutiya hamesha apna chehra kyun thak kar rakhti hai… kahi ise ye dar toh nahi ki hum log iske muh me mutth mar denge… hahaha… sala aisi badi gand ko ek baar chhu bas loon toh 10-12 baar apne aap jhad jaun…”

“abey, wo dekh…”RP bola… 

“kya…”

“abey uske baye pond ke paas uska payjama fata hai.. Sali ne chaddi tak nahi pahni…. Chudne ka itna khumar… ki chaddi utarne me ek second bhi waste nahi karna chahti… arey wo raand…. Kabhi hostel aa… sab mil kar itna chodenge ki mar jayegi behan ki lawdi… aur marne ke baad tujhe wahi gaad denge jaha humlog ganja ugate hai, is-se kya hai zameen upjau bani rahegi aur ganje ki kheti mast hogi… main toh tere gand me mitti bhar ke ganje ka ek paudha teri gand me bhi ugaunga….”

“abey takle.. teri ghar me koyi maa behan nahi hai kya… kabhi unko bhi le kar aaya kar.. sala is kutiya ko hamesha le aata hai… aur sun, bina chaddi pahnaye lana, kyunki bina chaddi ke sadak par chalte hue jab unka payjama unki pond ke beech fas jayega toh hume imagination me aasani hogi… dekh RP kitna sahansheel hai betichod… itne din se iski maa-behan ek kar rahe hai, par kuch bolta tak nahi”

“bolne ki baat toh door hai, wo toh hume dekhta tak nahi…”

“jo is-se kuch bulwa le, main pure char saal uski gulami karunga…”RP ne taav me aakar kaha

“main bhi…”usi taav me dusare ne bhi kaha..

“main bhi…”

“main bhi…”

“main bhi…”

“main kya, humara pura batch uski gulami karega”

“tumhari maa ka… ab mujhse control nahi ho raha, bahut ho gaya… tum logo ka… ab main bhi maje lunga… bahut der se khud ko sharif bana kar baitha hua hoon”apni jagah se uthkarar main daudte hue parapet(reling) par chadha aur us couple ko dekh kar bola…

“pani me bheegkar aaya hai, mahtarichod… zaroor aashiqi 2 dekh ke aaya hoga…”iske baad maine apne pant ki zib kholi aur lund bahar nikal kar unhe dikhate hue hilane laga… “idhar dekh re randi… babaji ko pranam karo, nariyal fodo, agarbatti jalakar safed aashirwad prapt karo… ”

Lekin jab mere itna sab kuch karne ke bawzood un dono ne dekha tak nahi toh maine unke aur paas aane ka intezaar kiya aur jab wo paas aaye toh maine Parapet me hee khade hokar unki taraf mootna shuru kar diya.. 

“come on, Arman… You can be better…ok.. start.. 3..1…2.. bhadwa hai, madarchod… abey yeeeee hai… ab pahchana ise, iski maa toh pichhale hafte police raid me 20 aadmi se chudwate hue pakdayi thi… phhir raid se bachne ke liye thane me iski maa ko pure police walo ne choda tha, lekin iski maa itni badi randi thi ki police walo se hee paisa magne lagi… jiske bad police walo ne apne sage-sambandhio ko bhi police station bulaya aur sabne iski maa ko tang utha-utha kar choda… aur jo iske sath muh baandh kar ja rahi hai na, wo koyi aur nahi iski maa hee hai… tabhi uski gand aise curve mar rahi hai… Sali kutiya… humse chudwa le… 20-30  de hee denge…”
“ruk bhosdike… meri maa ke bare me aisa bolta hai…”

“ab bhai teri maa randi hai toh isme meri kya galti… dalali toh tu hee kar raha hai. le..ye le..” 5 ka sikka jeb se nikal kar fekte hue maine kaha… “apni bhosad maa ko aaj raat ke liye bhej de… kal subah ek bhai tujhe gift karunga… tujhe pata hai tere paida hone se pahle teri maa sadak me bheek magti thi aur log teri maa ko ek-ek do-do rupaye ke badle me sadak ke kinare hee choda karte the… jise bhi chodna hota wo jake teri bheekh magti maa ke katore me ek rupaye fekta aur fir wahi gacha-gach teri maa ke sath shuru ho jata… yaha tak ki gali me ghoomne wale aawara kutte bhi teri maa ko chodte the.. teri maa unkkalund aur mutth chat-tii thi… ek baar toh aisa hua ki…”

Itti der me us aadmi ne neeche zameen se ek patthar uthaya aur mujhe nishana banaya… uske patthar fekne se pahle main taiyar ho gaya ki.. jab wo mujhe patthar marega toh main catch kar lunga lekin main isme asafal raha aur patthar seedhe mere mathe me laga…. 

“bhag ke channel gate band kar…”apna sar sahlate hue maine kaha…

Wo aadmi meri gali sunkar kuch jyada hee gusse me aa gaya tha, usne pahle mujhe patthar mara aur phhir khisiya kar bada sa patthar uthakar hostel ke gate ki taraf dauda… lekin wo gate tak pahuchta us-se pahle hee channel gate band ho chuka tha…

“kyaaa chahiye aapko…”achanak hui is bhag-daud se apne room me so raha warden utha aur us-se chillakar pucha

“tum warden ho yaha ke…”us aadmi ne bhi chilla kar kaha…

“haaaaa… toh…”warden phhir chillaya “sala na raat me sone ko milta hai aur na din me…”

“ek baat batao… yaha pagal log rahte hai kya..? madarchod din me jata hoon tab bhi bakte hai aur sham ko wapas aate samay bhi bakte hai… pichhle ek mahine se itna torture hua hoon ki raat me sapne me inki galiya sunayi deti hai…”

“college me complaint karo…”bolkar warden apne room me dubak gaya… 
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“kya hua, itna tension me kyu hai…”room me Saurabh ne mujhse puchha…

“main zinda hoon na…? kahi aisa toh nahi ki.. ye sab kkabhi hua hee na ho… tujhe pata nahi par main story banana me mahir hoon… meri puri zindagi mere dimag ki upaj toh nahi hai…. mujhe is waqt hospital me hona chahiye tha…” bolkar main fb se Esha ki photo churane laga… “sala madarchod, Gautam… meri maal ke sath bahut selfie le raha hai aajkal…”

“tum mujhe khoon do, main tumhe aazadi dunga…”room ke bahar bheed me Arun chillaya

“hume aazadi nahi bf chahiye…”

“thik hai phhir.. tum mujhe net do, main tumhe bf dunga…”

Net aur bf ka len-den karke Arun andar aaya aur aate hee mujhse bola..
“wo sab tune fix kiya tha na…”

“kya.. wo sab.”

“wo us aadmi ko gali dene ka pura plan…”

“tujhe kaise pata chala..”

“jab Rajshri Pandey chhat me chillaya ki…. Main kya, mera pura batch us shaks ki gulami karega jo us aadmi se kuch bulwa le… tabhich… tabhich… apun sab samajh gaya. kitna gira hua insaan hai tu…”

“gire hue insano se aise hee kaam liya jata hai… ab main unke paas yadi prem se jata aur bolta ki… bhaiyo, aaj ke baad meri jis-se bhi ladayi hogi, chahe wo hostel ka senior hee kyun na ho.. tum log aankh band karke mera sath dena. … tujhe kya lagta hai wo aise me sath dete..? nahi… Rajshri Pandey ko main pahle se jaanta tha, baki us din hostel ke saamne uske muhbole bhai ko batti dena toh plan ka hissa tha, RP ne mere kahne pe jaan-buchkar daru ki botal ko apne room se nahi hataya aur us time chicken khane baitha, jis time uske gaanv se aane wali bus highway pe rukti hai aur main us din isiliye Marlboro lene ke baad apne hostel na jakar junior ke hostel me tujhe lekar gaya aur RP ko bachaya…. taki juniors soche ki zaroorat padne par main unka bhi sath dunga….”

“tune Rajshri ke sath sab jugad jamaya… tujhe maloom tha ki wo aadmi apni biwi ke sath roj university se aata hai aur tune use galiya di… taki log baad me tere bolne par marne-maarne par utaru ho jaye… mast chutiya banaya bakiyo ko lekin mujhe nahi…”room se jate hue Arun ne kaha…

“aur tu ab tak nahi samjha ki meri ragging ke dauran kayro ki tarah jab tu room me chhipa tha toh uske baad bhi maine tujhe kuch kyun nahi kaha… tujhse dosti kyun nahi todi… kyunki main do hafte me hee jaan gaya tha ki tu meri tarah sanki hai… yadi main best toh tu second best… aura pun kabhi nahi chahega ki mere jaisa hee koyi mere khilaf ho…”Arun ke jaane ke baad maine socha….
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“ye Pandey aaj itna udas kyun hai…”cafeteria me maine Arun se puchha…

“jisko wo line mar raha tha, wo use dhokha dekar kisi aur se set ho gayi… lol...”

“teri maal Divya ne bhi toh tujhe dhokha diya.. lol”

“kam se kam meri abhi tak Divya single toh hai.. Esha toh tere saamne Gautam ke 
sath ghoomte rahti hai.. dono ek car me aate hai, ek car me jaate hai aur isi dauran beech raaste me car rok-kar kahi…………”

“rook kyun gaya, aage bol na… maza aa raha hai…”

“ajeeb chutiya insaan hai be.. tu..”

“actually, mujhe kal raat gyan ki prapti ho gayi… jaise Shri Gautam Buddha ji ko hui thi na…waisich.. unko Bodhi briksha ke neeche gyan ki prapti hui thi aur mujhe mere laptop ke saamne bf dekhte hue… mera ab in sansarik sukh-dukh se koyi lena dena nahi hai… baki yadi koyi ladki khud aake chodne ke liye bolegi toh main chod dunga, aisa bhi nahi hai”

“kisi ladki ke itne bure din nahi aaye..”

“bure din…? most eligible boyfriend hoon main is college ka… yaha itne sare ladke hai… unme se tu beta, gin ke ek aise ladke ka name bata de… jo mere se jyada handsome ho, jo goggle lagane ke baad mere jitna manohar, haseen, sudaul ho… jo do-do cigarette ek sath muh me daba ke peeta ho… most eligible boyfriend hoon main… ladkiya mere naam se mutth marti hai… mujhe dekh aur phhir khud ko dekh… tujhe toh sharm se hee 20-30 bar ikatthe mar jana chahiye…”

“tu Esha ke liye meri kuch jyada bezzati nahi kar raha…”

“hat sala uska naam lekar uska naam ganda kar diya aur Esha ke liye sab kuch jayaj hai… uske liye toh main teri kya.. teri maa ki bhi bezzati kar du”fb se Esha ki churayi hui photo Arun ko dikhate hue maine kaha “ye dekh… kaha ye, kudrat ka karishma aur kaha tu, kudrat ka shraap… tere se achchha toh tere peechhe khada ye Chetan Bhagat ka bhai dikhta hai… aa be hakle… baith… ladki patane ki trick deta hoon tujhe…”

Arun ke peechhe khade Deepak Bhagat ko maine apne paas bulaya, jo meri baat bahut der se sun raha tha…. wo haklu saamne aaya aur mere bagal me baitha… jiske thodi der baad pyar ke gam me doobe Rajshri Pandey ne bhi waha aasan grahan kiya…

“ye sale, mechanical wale sab jhand hote hai… unke branch me toh ladki rahti nahi… lawde dusaro ki maal me muh marte firte hai… madarchod, jis ladki ke peeche main pada tha… wo mechanical branch ke first year ke ladke se set ho gayi… yanii, apne se junior se… wo bhi ladki ne khud use propose mara…”

“madarchod, main bhi mechanical ka hoon…”Arun bola…

“arey main city walo ko bol raha tha…”iske baad Deepak Bhagat ke kandhe par hath rakh kar RP bola “kyun be psycho... teri item ka kya haal hai… suna hai tera room partner use chod raha hai…”
“i..i.. love.. s.s.sssss”
“isliye tere se nahi pati…”ek jhapad kheech ke use marte hue maine kaha.. “agar teri jagah main rahta aur Arun ne meri item ko pataya hota toh main Arun ke muh me moot deta… lekin tu toh sale dhang se moot bhi nahi payega…”
“wwww…. Wo… kyun”
“ kyunki… jis tarah main mahan.. mera lund mahan… usi tarah tu hakla… tera lund hakla…. Matlab rook-rook kar mootega…”
“mera mazak mat..mat..mat udao… aaj mera mazak tum log uda rahe ho… kal meri jagah tu ho sakta hai… frame of refrence… tujhe toh iska mat.mat. matlab bhi nahi pppppppata hoga..”
“nahi pata…. tu hee bata de…”
“object change ho jate hai, isme…”
“bas..?”
“haan.. yahi frame of refrence hai…”
“madarchod…”uska baal pakad kar uska sar gol-gol ghoomate hue maine kaha “library me padi ek jhat book se relativity topic ke andar 4-5 line frame of refrence ke baare me padhkar mujhe gyan chod raha hai… tujhe toh ye bhi nahi maloom hoga ki jo meaning toh bata raha hai, wo relativity ke terms me bhi loosely fit baithega… actual me iska meaning kuch aur hai… isiliye teri maal tere se nahi pati.. ab toh teri maal ko main chodunga aur hostel me nanga karke usko hunter se mar-mar ke uski gand laal kar dunga…”
“Eeeeeessshaa ko main…”
“arey hat madarchod…”uska sar pakad kar table par marte hue main waha se utha aur bahar jaane laga… jaha beech raaste me Gautam mujhe dikha…Actually maine Bhagat ko mara hee isiliye tha, taaki Gautam ko dikha saku… 
“dekh le be… tujhe bhi aise hee marunga.. isliye aukat me raha kar…”Gautam se itna bolkar main cafeteria se bahar nikal gaya…..
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“so tellllllll….. m…. Armaaaaaaan, why yooo diiiiiiid you ……. that…”

“did what…. Ek minute, aawaz saaf nahi aa rahi..”apne kaan me lagi hearing machine/hearing aid ko set karte hue maine kaha… 

“why did you do that…”mere saamne baithi ek doctor boli…

“ab maine kya kiya… aur ye item kaun hai..”apne kaan ki machine thik karne ke baad maine charo taraf dekhkar khud se sawal kiya… “Sali randi toh nahi hai… ya phhir meri fan hogi… bahut fan following hai meri lawda…. Pure universe me mujhe jaante hai……. lag toh ye hospital raha hai… ye mere hath ko kya hua aur ye mera pair… madarchod goli ghusi thi yaha aur mujhe sunne ke liye hearing aid lena pad raha hai… ye flashback nahi flash-forward hai… yani future……”

“Tell me, Arman… tummhare sath tumhare ghar me kya hua, jab tum 8th Semester ke baad ghar gaye toh…”

“ye randi hai kaun… jo Shri Arman se sawal kar rahi hai…”aas-paas mahol ka jayja lete hue maine ek baar phhir khud se kaha “wo raha bahar wala gate… chal bhag”
Main chair se uthkar sirf do-teen kadam darwaje ki taraf badha tha ki… ek-dum se zameen par muh ke bal gira…

“Arman, tum bhag kyun rahe ho…”

“chup be chhinar… mujhe pata hai tu mera lund katne wali hai… aur mera lund kat ke freezer me rakh legi aur jab bhi mann karega toh chusegi… randiyo ko main shakal dekh ke pahchan jata hoon…”
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“that girl you just saw.. was Angelina… a future event. Anyway do you remember all these memories… except the last one, that will happen in future”

“sorry…”

“don’t tell me, you cant recognize your own face……….. again”

“no…”

“really…?”

“i mean I don’t remember these memories.. my mind got blank and these incidents don’t ring the single bell in my brain…. How can these incidents completely slipped my mind. it’s like someone’s adding new incidents in my past life… plot is same, but these incidents… it feels fresh… not a single bit of these moments are striking my mind… it feels live not highlight”

“don’t worry, once I’ll be done you will get new life…”

“what if I don’t want new life…”

“still you’ll get one.. you’re going to die, my friend… I’ve watched you, manipulated you for years…”

“still you’ll get one.. you’re going to die very soon, my friend… I’ve watched you, manipulated you…. for years… now There is no such way, there is no such plan by which you can survive”

“bitch please, I survived 4 years of engineering…”

“bad time to crack a joke….”

“ok…enough. Let’s assume that somehow I believe this… okayyy… ok. you’re not my hallucination but then… I have to believe in everything related to you... right ?”

“yes and that’s what I want.”

“then a while ago, I saw a moment… somehow, I was speaking to Angelina. that means, I’m going to survive this………”

“what if I tell you that, that will happen in other dimension….? What I want to say is Your whole life, your whole hallucinations, your whole story is combination of alternate realities… when you’re hallucinating, you’re not actually hallucinating… you just visualize incidents from the other dimensions... ”

“and how am I able to do that…?”muskurate hue maine puchha…

“because of me…. I’m the best version of you… or I should say, you’re just a corrupted copy of mine in other dimension… you’re just a puppet but now I’m gonna kill you… You've caused me a lot of harm, not anymore. Now tell me, Arman… How do you save yourself, when you are about to kill yourself”

“ bahut hua. mujhe pata hai ki ye sab mere dimag ki banayi hui kahani hai… just like a maze. Jisme main kho chuka hoon. Main zaroor is waqt coma me hoon aur yaha se bahar nikalne ke liye mujhe ye khel khelna hee padega… mujhe apne dimag ki is bhool-bhulaya se nikalna hee hoga.. sala kya mastermind aadmi hoon main bhi… khud ko hee gandu bana raha hoon.“apne samne khade mere jaise hee dikhne wale ko dekhkar maine socha aur jaise-jaise main ye sochta gaya wo muskurata gaya…

“ye sala gay toh nahi hai… mera matlab kahi ye mera dimag toh nahi padh raha... yadi aisa hua toh phhir main ise harane ka plan kaise banaunga…. ek rasta hai, jis-se main ye check kar sakta hoon. abhi check karta hoon… sun be…. teri biwi ki choot me tere bete ka lund…. teri maa ka bhosda itna bada hai ki teri maa ke bhosde me tera baap apna pura sar dalkar chata karta tha… teri maa randi thi… teri maa madarchod thi… teri maa shemale thi.. teri maa ke muh ki jagah choot tha.. teri maa muh se moota karti thi aur tera baap ek sath teri aur teri maa ki gand mara karta tha… tu apne baap ka gand chat-ta tha… gadchataue….  hat teri maa ka bam bhosda”

“stop it… I know you don’t believe me… you never did… so now I’m gonna tell you my story one more time… few years ago or many years ago… we were part of Quantum Computing program through brain….”

“quantum computing through brain……? Hahaha.. and how were you gonna perform that process you just called Quantum computing through brain… ? by installing a software from playstore…? lol”

“by DMT… dimethyltriptamine. The Spirit Molecule… It produced naturally inside of human brain during sleeping…”

“in pineal gland.. both in plants and animals…”maine achanak se kaha… ya phhir clearly kahu toh apne aap mere muh se nikla…

“ye maine kaise kiya… mujhe toh ye bhi nahi maloom ki pineal gland hai kya…?”

“that’s why I admire you.. you’re the only version of mine, who defeated me… and I still have to know that how you did that…”

“and when I defeated you…?”

“in future”

“so, you’re saying that I’m gonna survive these injuries or I did it already… I just have to open the tunnels of my brain to go back”

“but on what prize… and the more important question is do you really want to go back ? I don’t think so. I mean…. Why would you like to go to a world that you hate since you have been born. I can give you the peace you always wanted. I can free you from your miseries. Just allow me to kill you, peacefully or I’ll do it forcefully…”

“ forcefully.. ? if you could kill me then you would have killed me… anyway according to you I’ve beat you before… ”

“that’s why I’m manipulating your brain… I’m changing your memories. So do whatever I speak, or else I will make your life so bad that after some time you will not even recognize who you are.”

“You said that I have beat you earlier”

“In future….so I chose the time when I could beat you, I changed your whole life. I changed People’s attitude towards you and the result of this is that today you are losing your life and in the last moment of your life… you’re alone.”

“how did you change my whole life..”

“In our world, we have been experimenting on a secret project. some died, some gone insane but I passed the experiment right”

“what was that experiment…”

“connect to parallel universe through brain by injecting extra DMT, the spirit molecule in the brain”

“to perform quantum computing stunt….?”

“yes.. but then people in parallel universe started dying due to our program…”

“aukat se jata nahi bol raha tu… tu hai kaun… itna toh main samajh chuka hoon ki ye sab kuch mere dimag me ho raha hai. 1.0 tu hai nahi… 2.0 aisa tha nahi aur 3.0 tu ho nahi sakta, kyunki wo main hoon… phhir meri shakl tujhse kaisi milti hai aur ek baat batau…. ekdum jhat lag raha hai… ”

“you can call me 4.0, though I’m not… what will be your response, if I tell you that… I’m 5 dimensional ”

“At first I’ll laugh at you and then punch you… anyway, continue… I’m enjoying this”

“we’re never meant to kill our own versions in parallel dimension… but then something bad happened and I started killing my own. i killed thousands of my own kind, my own forms in other worlds…. but you beat me. I don’t know how… but you beat me… you beat me so brutally that I feel like a 3-dimensional… ordinary people…. And then I chose a time where I could kill you. the time is just a dimension for us, we can go ahead in time….. even behind”

“so you’re saying that you’re from 5 dimension world and you traveled back in time …. Just to kill me..? a 3-dimensional ordinary man… who cant even make a tea…”
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Note: next update raat me dene ka try marunga. thank you everyone. 

“No, it's not like that. I'm not a murderer…. But at the same time, I can’t stop myself from killng you. When the Quantum Computing program started, the first parallel world I went to, the first man’s brain I was connected to was a murderer and He was killed just hours after I joined him. I felt everything that the man did ... I felt stress on my neck. I felt dying myself and then I died with him. We did not envisage what would happen if we died before our return from Parallel world to our real world. I died with that criminal at that time and it closed the channel to my world. My consciousness was lost for some time and I was lost too and then when I sensed, I was in another Parallel World. It goes like this. I die and then open my eyes in the new Parallel World and in this sequence I found you.”

“it means I have to die so that you can live. Now…. I understand why I see such terrible dreams and why, I do not sleep at night. You fucked my brain so bad that I see the ghost of Aradhna and Despite having fadu memory I forget a lot of things… such as my birthday party day but please clear one thing on whether I really had a girl named Esha in my life or it is just my hallucination or imagination or lawda-lahsun due to your so-called DMT aka the Spirit Molecule… please, tell me… what I was, what was my life in reality. Do i really have a big brother ? I am very tired now fighting all these things. Please answer me..”

“fuck you and take it easy…. You’re in transition phase.. soon you’ll reach the zero point, from where.. I’ll take the charge. ”

“zero point….?”

“That point where past, present and future meet together. So Keep your fingers crossed… bitch”
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“Arman bhai…. Bhai… kaha kho gaye… arey wapas aao.. wo idhar hee aa rahi hai..”

“Arman bhai…. Arey kya hua… utho… bhai… wo idhar hee aa rahi hai… aise samay me dhokha mat do… mera moot nikal jayega..”

“sala phhir se past tense…”apna sar sahlate hue maine kaha…

“bach gaya… aaaahhhh… waise hua kya tha, achanak se aisa laga jaise khade-khade mar gaye…”

“chup be… sala ek toh ye bhi nahi maloom ki tu kabhi haqiqat me tha bhi ya nahi… main khamkha kyu tere liye ladta firu…”

“kar do na… parallel universe ki khatir…”

“tujhe kaise pata be… parallel universe ke bare me…”

“kal aap hee toh bol rahe the ki yadi humlog 3 dimension se aage badh jaye toh bahut kuch kar sakte hai… tarah-tarah ki laundiya chod sakte hai, gori-gori choot chat sakte hai… ladiyo ke muh me lawda de sakte hai”

“ye maine kaha… wo bhi kal…?”

“haan…”

“lagta hai zero point door nahi… madarchod, usne sach kaha tha ki main, khud ko kaise bachaunga… jab main khud hee khud ko marne wala hoon…”

“aap phhir se kho gaye…”mujhe jor se hilate hue RP ne kaha… 

“Woo…wo.. wo toh apun acting kar rela tha… ab performance toh dena mangta hai na beedu… waise ekdum fad acting karta hoon na… sala ab samajh me aaya ki main aksar aise beech me kisi se bhi baat karte-karte kyun kho jata tha”

“bilkul…. Ekdum mast acting karte ho. bhagwan aapka bada kare.. par aapke performance ke chakkar me meri gand fat ke chauraha ho gayi thi….”

“la pani de… fir teri maal se bhidta hoon..”Rajshri ke bag se pani ka botal nikal kar peete hue maine socha “madarchod sabkuch ekdum itne saye-saye se ho raha hai ki… sala kuch palle hee nahi pad raha… upar se ye ladki…”

“chakhna..? kaha hai be”

“chakhna.? Pani pee rahe ho, daru nahi….”

“toh kya pani.. bina chakhne ke peete hai…?”

“aur nahi toh kya….”us ladki ko apni taraf aata dekh paseene se tar-batar hote hue RP ne jawab diya… 

“acha hua, bata diya… mujhe toh maloom hee nahi tha… anyway… hiiiiiii”Rajshri ko dhokha dene wali item ko maine hath dikhaya aur pani peene laga…
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Rajshri ek samay ek ladki ke peechhe kafi pagal tha par wo ladki RP ko lawda dikhakar kisi aur ka lawda apni pond me le rahi thi… mujhe bura toh laga par phhir bhi maine bura nahi mana… reason…wahi… anyway, jab wo ladki kisi dusare se set ho gayi toh Rajshri ke kahne par maine uske boyfriend ko pel diya tha matlab do-teen jhapad mar diya tha. jyada isliye nahi maar paya kyunki wo ek hosteler tha.

“is-se bolo ki ye yaha se chala jaye… main tumse akele me baat karna chahti hoon… Raj…”

“Raj…… hahaha… iski maa ka…” pani peete hue mujhe itni jor ki hasi aayi ki mera pani peene ka balance bigda aur jitna pani mere muh se lekar gardan ke beech tha, wo sab mere achanak hasne cum khasne ke karan us ladki ke chehre, gardan aur doodh me ja gira…

“sorry.”khaste hue maine kaha… “tumne isko Raj kaha toh achanak se hasi aa gayi… really sorry. You continue…”

Sorry bolkar Main wapas pani peene laga… wo mujhe thodi der tak ghoorti rahi, phhir mann me gali di aur wapas RP se baat karne lagi… 

“Raj… ye tumne thik nahi kiya….”

Usne ek bar phhir se Pandey ko Raj kaha hee tha ki.... maine phhir se uske muh me thook diya… 

“Aaaaaaa, kutte tu aisi harqat kyun kar raha hai… teri behan ke sath koyi aisa kare toh… laj-sharam sab dhokar pee gaya hai kya….”

“tujhse toh jyada hee laj-sharam hai mere andar… do-do lawda choot me ek sath lene wali, sari duniya se chudwate ghoom rahi hai aur mujhe naseehat de rahi hai…”

“toh bhadwe tera kya ja raha hai… meri choice hai ye…”gala fad kar wo boli… jis-se waha aas-paas mauzood sabhi log parking ki taraf dekhne lage.

“ye choice-voice kuch nahi suddh randi-pana hai. suna hai ki tu 25  me deti hai… sach hai kya…? matlab tera 25  kaun deta hai… main toh free me na loon”

“tu samajhta kya khud ko… tere bare me sach hee bolte hai sab ki tu ek number ka….”

“bitch please.. first raise your level, then raise your voice… now get lost. Aur gali mat dena, warna main jis level ki gali aajkal dene laga hoon na… wo sunkar tere dimag ki nashe fat jayegi… matlab itni intense gali deta hoon. Isliye ja, apne boyfriend ko bol ki wo aisa samjhe ki uske baap ne use laundiyabazi karne ki saza di hai aur phhir aaram se ghumo… mera aashirwad tumhare sath hai. sada suhagan raho aur yadi bhag kar shadi karna ho toh batana… victim main ban jaunga…”

“victim nahi Arman bhai… witness…”

“haa wahi… witness aur tu sun ladki, 25 me mat diya kara… chillar ki problem hoti hogi ladko ko. 30 me ya 20  me diya kar… Chal RP. chal..chalkar ek dusare ki gand me ungali karte hai… yahi bacha hai zindagi me. ab…”
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Main parking se hostel ki taraf muda par puri tarah mud nahi paya.... mere aas paas mauzood har chiiz mere charo oor teji se ghoomne lagi… itni teji se ki mujhe kuch nahi dikh raha tha… ye aisa hee tha, jaise bachpan me hum log aankh band karke hath faila kar gol-gol ghooma karte the aur jab ghoomte-ghoomte gand fat jati toh jaise rukne ke baad sar ghooma karta tha…. waisich mujhe abhi feel ho raha tha. main kuch der wahi khada raha aur bardasht karta raha aur phhir jab ye bardasht ke bahar ho gaya toh main apna sar pakad kar wahi baith gaya…

"Hiii... Did you have any victories you want to share”

Maine use dekha jisne abhi-abhi mera naam liya tha… phhir use dekhne ke baad maine aas-paas ke mahol ko dekha aur phhir muskura diya… fir main past me gaya aur uske sawal par gaur kiya…..

“sorry main samjha nahi… tum meri kaun si victory ke bare me puch rahi ho.. ab kya hai ki mujh jaisa shoorveer jisne lakho jung jeeti hai, wo thoda confuse ho jata hai…aise sawalo se”

“tum na... kabhi-kabhi... i was asking about your day... What was frustrating about your day?” mand-mand muskurate hue Esha boli 

“I don’t remember and I don’t care… anyway... it’s nice to see you. After so much time I enjoyed seeing you…aisa lagta hai sadiya beet gaye.. tumhe thoda ajeeb lagega.. thoda kya bahut ajeeb lagega.. par kya main tumhe thoda sa touch marke confirm karu kya....”

"Zelja.. 4 ghante pahle humne sex kiya hai aur bol rahe ho ki tumse mile sadiya beet gayi.."

"Hat pagli... mazak karne ki teri aadat abhi tak nahi gayi.. aise hee bol-bol ke meri aisi taisi kar di tune... par mera dil bahut bada hai.. ja tujhe maaf kiya... "

"Zelja...?"thodi der chup rahne ke baad... ek-do saans lene ke baad Esha sirf itna hee boli... Zelja..
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Ye Zelja... kya hai behanchod... zaroor english ka koyi khati word hoga. Sala yadi meaning puchh liya toh bezzati ho jayegi... 

"Zeljaaaa..."abki baar Esha thoda aur teji ke sath boli... jiske jawab me maine bhi kah diya... "Zelja.." .

Maine socha zaroor koyi phrase ya riwaz hoga... jisme jab samne wala Zelja bole toh uske samne wale ko bhi Zelja bolna hota hoga...

"Zelzaaa..."wo fir boli

"Zelja..."maine bhi repeat kiya...

"Zelja... go.."

"Zelja... kaha go.."

"Zelja.. it's your turn... go"

"Zelja.. ok.."
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Aur main apni seat se utha aur mere khade hote hee itne jor se log taaliya bajane lage ki mujhe aisa laga jaise mere sare fans aaj yahi aa gaye hai... maine bhi hath uthakar abhivadan kiya... maine pahle aise hee simple tarike se hath uthakar abhivadan kiya aur phhir bagal me baithe ek aadmi ke jeb me rakha goggle jabarjasti kheecha aur goggle pahankar logo ka abhivadan kiya... jis-se log aur jor se taaliya bajane lage... jis se mere andar aur josh aa gaya aur main apni seat par khade hokar logo ko flying kiss dene laga....
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"Zeljaaa... Zeljaa...Zeljaaa..."wo sab chillaye.

"Zelja... Zelja.."main bhi chillaya...

jis par ab kuch log hasne lage the... Esha mera hath pakad kar neeche kheechne lagi... wo mujhe baithne ke liye bol rahi thi. Par ye kya... ye kaise ho sakta hai... aisa toh door-door tak kabhi nahi hua aur Esha bol rahi thi ki maine uske sath 4 ghante pahle sex kiya... ? Par aisa toh kabhi nahi hua tha. Infact Maine toh use aaj tak bikni tak me nahi dekha tha phhir sex toh bahut door ki baat hai..... 

"toh kya main future me hoon..."maine apne aas-paas dekha... 

Waha bhari bharkam bheed is waqt jama thi aur sab Zelja... Zelja chilla rahe the. Maine khud ki shakl dekhne ke liye apne jeb se mobile nikalna chaha... par mere jeb me mera mobile nahi tha... isliye maine jis-se thodi der pahle goggle chheena tha usi ke saamne wale jeb me se uska mobile kheecha...

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"Sorry man... thodi der me lautata hoon aur ye jhat type ke kya dhoti jaise kapde pahan ke aaye ho tum sab log... mujhe dekh ke kuch seekho..."
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Maine uske mobile me camera on kiya aur khud ko dekhne laga... usme meri photo ke sath neeche Name... umra aur address bhi likha aa raha tha... main dikh toh same raha tha... par mere baal thoda gandu type ke lambe-lambe the aur toh aur maine bhi wahi dhoti type kapde pahan rakha tha... jo waha auro ne pahan rakha tha. Meri shakl toh same thi par mere khayal se meri umra thodi jyada thi. Mere bal bhi safed hone lage the... matlab main same hokar bhi same nahi tha... phhir maine auditorium ko gaur se dekha... ye na toh mere college ka auditorium tha aur na hee yaha anchoring ki practice chal rahi thi... ye toh koyi function tha... jise main Esha ke sath attend kar raha tha....
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Mujhe apni aankho pe yakin nahi hua... matlab ye toh ekdum out of syllabus nahi balki out of world tha... maine socha ki ye mera vaham hoga... isliye maine phhir se camera me khud ko dekha... nateeza wahi pahle wala hee tha. Jiske baad camera ke neeche jo name, age likha aa raha tha maine waha dekha aur dekhta hee rah gaya....
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"Ye log Zelja...Zelja .. isliye nahi chilla rahe kyunki ye koyi riwaz ya phrase hai... ye log... ye isliye chilla rahe hai kyunki ye mera name hai... mere khayal se main future me nahi balki parallel world me hoon..."

Jaise hee mujhe ye maloom hua ki main shayad parallel dimension me hoon ... main us auditorium se uthkar bahar bhaga. Par aisa karne wala main akela nahi tha... mere peechhe aur bhi kuch log bhage. Pahle-pahal toh mujhe laga ki wo sab mere die hard fans honge par baad me samajh aaya ki wo mere fans nahi balki mere security ke liye the... unme se do ne mera hath pakda aur mujhe neeche le jaane lage... Main shayad yaha bahut badi hasti tha... main jaha rahta tha wo jagah bhi badi alishan thi... upar se duniya bhar ki security... sukh.. suvidha... maine pel ke khana khaya.. mast daru piya aur phhir apne signature style me do cigarette ek sath jalaya...
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"Zelja..."mere kamre me ek aadmi aate hue bola "tumne ye thik nahi kiya Zelja.. tumne kaha tha ki bagiyo ko tum surrender karne ka mauka doge... par aaj jab tum bina kuch bole auditorium se aise hee chale aaye toh Zokaro ka bagiyo ko marne ka bill pass ho gaya... itihas tumhe tumhari is kayarta ke liye kabhi maaf nahi karega"

"Gautam... tu... tu yaha kya kar raha hai aur tere gand me himmat kaise hui mujhse baat karne ki... madarchod mujhse tu karke baat karta hai... rook bhosdiwale... abhi teri maa chodta hoon..."

Main apni jagah se uth khada hua aur table me rakhe pens me se do pen uthakar Gautm ke paas gaya... wo clueless nazar aa raha tha. 

"Is b ko rokne ke liye humne tumhe kitna gold diya tha... tab toh kisi paltu kutte ki tarah humari haan me haan milaya tha tumne... tumhari is harqat se tumhe andaza bhi hai ki kitna collateral damage hoga... hazaro begunah log mare jayenge... tum ye rok sakte the"

"I dont remember and i dont care..."

Mujhe maloom tha ki wo Gautam... wo Gautam nahi tha... jise main jaanta tha... par phhir bhi maine apne dono hatho me ek-ek pen liya aur Gautam ke paas jakar uske dono kano me ghusa diya....
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"Zellll...jaaa..."neeche zameen par girte hue wo zor se chillaya...
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"Abey gandmare... kya soch raha hai...chal... abey chal na... "mujhe kheechte hue Arun ne kaha... "aise hee desh ki raksha karega... jaha dekho... wahi so jata hai... uth.. chal desh ko teri zaroorat hai... teen goli chahiye mujhe tere seene me..."

" phhir se past tense... sigh... anyway... maine abhi-abhi Gautam ko jaan se maar diya. Chal papa bol"

"90° pe clockwise direction me ghoom..."

"90° pe clockwise... roger that... ye toh Gautam hai..."

"Wo bhi Esha ke sath aur tu bol raha tha ki tune use maar diya..."

"Haan toh sach bol raha tha... maine use sach me mara.. par yaha nahi, kisi aur duniya me... parallel dimension me..."

"Aur tu waha pahucha kaise..."

"Through brains... matlab not in physical way... matlab mind to mind shifting..."

" wo din door nahi jab tu logo ko patthar marega..."
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"Hat madarchod... teri dayi ko chodu... sale kallu... teri behan ka bhosda... kanghi wapas kar nahi toh teri behan Aradhna ka nanga naach hoga..."RP gusse se chillaya...

"Betichod.. gali kyu de raha hai..."

"Burmari ke..."kaliya ka baal pakad kar kheechte hue RP bola... jiske jawab me kallu bhi RP ka bal pakad kar kheechne laga.... 

"Arman... ye RP... kuch jyada udi me nahi rahta ? Ek kanghi ke peechhe uski behan ko gali de raha hai..."

"Randi hai madarchod... gand dekha hai tune uska... itna bada hai... lagta hai apne baap se chodwati hogi ghar me... "Jaha dono lad rahe the udhar jate hue maine Arun se kaha...

"Senior hoon main tera... chhod mujhe..."

"Senior hai toh kya ukhad lega... teri maa ko aaj raat me sarso tel laga ke chodunga..."

"Chhod... "RP ko kanghichor se alag karte hue maine kaha... RP toh alag ho gaya lekin ab kallu jyada excite ho gaya tha aur jab maine aur Arun ne dono ko alag kiya toh kallu ne RP ko phhir se pakad liya...

"Isiliye teri maa mar gayi madarchod... pure gaanv walo ne milke choda hoga... randi thi sali... main bhi choda hoon teri maa ko..."RP ki gardan dabate hue Kallu bola...

Kallu kanghichor ne jaise hee ye kaha meri aur Arun ki fat ke char ho gayi aur mujhe thoda-thoda ye abhas hua ki un logo ko kaisa lagta hoga... jab main unhe gali deta hoon... khair iske baad jyada kuch khas nahi hua... bas humne kallu kanghichor ke kapde fade aur nanga karke pure hostel me dauda-dauda kar mara... jiske baad RP ke sath main aur Arun ground ki taraf ghoomne nikal gaye... 

"Kyun be Pandey... aaj bahut gusse me tha..."

"Arey sala... india semifinal me Australia se haar gayi... madarchod pura mood off ho gaya. Phhir Socha ki taiyar-vaiyar hokar ground me ladkiyo ko tadunga toh kuch dard kam ho jayega... lekin kanghi hee nahi mili... Arman bhai... india jab aise bade match harti hai toh gand hee fat jati hai bc... pura mood hee off ho jata hai..."

"Pahle se hee imagine kar liya kar ki india haregi... aankh band karke wo scene dekha kar jisme vipakshi team khushiya manate hue nazar aati hai... isse fayda ye hoga ki yadi india phhir haar bhi gayi toh tu bur nahi manega kyunki wo toh tune pahle hee soch ke rakha hua tha aur yadi jeet gayi toh phhir balle-balle..."

"Ye kaam karta hai..?"

"It works.... worked for me. Depends on your imagination power... "

"Kaise..."

"Toss hone ke bad maine apni aankhe band ki.. highlight mode me Australia se pel ke run banwaye aur phhir highlight mode me india walo se jhat type se khilwaya aur 150 me all out karwa diya... phhir main india ke harne se dukhi bhi hua.. pura mood off ho gaya tha... jiske baad jab maine apni aankh kholi toh main india ki har ke liye taiyar tha."

"Matlab us chiz ka gam pahle hee mana lena... jo abhi hua hee nahi hai aur sure bhi nahi hai ki aisa hee hoga..."

"Thats the silver lining of being a pessimistic... ek nirashavadi sirf bura nahi sochta... wo us bure situation se ladne ki himmat bhi jutata hai aur ye sirf match ke results se nahi balki puri life se ladne me kaam aata hai. Ab jaise main pahle se hee maan chuka hoon ki Esha mere se nahi pategi... engineering ke baad meri life jhand ho jayegi... isliye ab mere sath kuch bhi ho...mujhe jyada fark nahi padega... main uske gam me padne ki bajay main kya kar sakta hoon ispar bina ek bhi second gawaye kaam kar sakta hoon..."

"ye sahi nahi hai... kisi ko bhi aisa nahi sochna chahiye."Arun ne kaha...

"Sometimes people dont need hopes... they need tricks to overcome their loss and grief... i'm not telling you to follow it... i'm just giving you another option to deal with your problems"

"Maa chudaye... main toh Arman bhai ko follow karunga..."RP chillaya " abhi sala room me jakar imagine karke aata hoon ki Kohli ipl me jhat type se khelega... "
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RP ke jaane ke baad main aur Arun wahi ground ke 400 meter ke track me paidal chalne lage... un dino main aur Arun duniyabhar ki idhar udhar ki baate karte hue kayi ghante tak kayi kilometer chal dete the... reason wahi... hum dono har jagah hamesha bahut bore hote the. Ab toh college ki ladkiyo ke bare me bhi baat karne me hume kuch khas maza nahi aata tha. Is boriyat se bachne ke liye TV series ek option toh tha par apne college ke bache kuche din laptop ke saamne gujarne ka mera koyi irada nahi tha... upar se future ki tension alag.... Arun ko. 

"Finally... final semester bhi khatam hone wala hai... kya karega aage... kuch socha hai"

"Yahi toh dikkat hai mere sath... main har chiz ke liye itna sochta hoon... itne tikdam khelta hoon. Plans banata hoon lekin jab mere future ki baat aati hai toh mujhe kuch samajh hee nahi aata... maine kabhi socha hee nahi ki mujhe zindagi me kya karna hai... mera koyi aim nahi hai... koyi goal nahi hai... main kuch bhi nahi banna chahta par shayad ab main samajh gaya hoon ki aisa kyun hai... mujhe shayad pahle se hee maloom tha ki main college ke baad jyada din tak zinda nahi rahunga. Isiliye maine apne liye kabhi koyi lakshya nirdharit nahi kiya tha... kyunki jab mujhe jeena hee do din tha toh main do mahine ki planning karke mehnat kyun karta..."

"Matlab..?. tu suicide toh nahi karne wala na.. yadi karega toh apne naam ki jaydad pahle mere naam kar dena... please..."

"Wo toh main kar dunga... par pahle ye bata ki saamne ground me tujhe wo disturbance dikh raha hai kya..."

"Disturbance ?"

"Basketball track tedha-medha ho raha hai kya..."

"Nahi..."

"Have you ever heard of that wormhole in brain which shifts you in another world created within brain..."

"Hat bc"

"Chal phhir... bye..."
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Aur main ek baar phhir se yahi tha... apne hostel ke saamne. Us jung lagi bench ke saamne jo aaj bhi wahi thi jaha mere college ke dino me hua karti thi.
"Wapas reality me jaane ke liye bas yaha se nikalne ki zaroorat hai... jiske baad Nisha ke pure khandan ko pelunga... bahut khushi mana rahe honge madarchod log... next target: David... i'm coming bitches... be scared... be very scared"

Chapter-34: To Exist...? 2

Jiske baad main ek baar phhir se yahi tha… apne dimag me, apni khud ki banayi duniya me… jaha mauzood har ek shaks mere baare me sab kuch jaanta tha… jaha mauzood har ek shaks mujhe samajhta tha. main waha se andar apne kamre me aaya aur ek baar phhir se apne kamre ki khidki ke paas khada hokar hostel ke bahar bench par mera intezaar karti hui Esha ko dekh raha tha… mere dimag me ek baar phhir se pura Ganga-Jamuna kand ghoomne laga.. jaise main waha pahli baar+ aakhiri baar kab gaya.. kyun gaya... kaise meri vazah se Daddu ne ek ladki ko jaan se mara... kaise main thuka aur kaise meri vazah se Daddu thuka... 
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“KL… KL…”room ke darwaje par ek laat maarkar andar aate hue Arun bola(KL= kya lawda)

"HL...."(hii lawda)

"ML..."(mast lawda)

“hat lawda…”peechhe mudkar maine kaha “gand fat gayi bhai… tujhe pata hai kaise baandhkar pela mujhe..."

“ab lund se bada laad loge toh yahi na hoga… sabne mana kiya ki mat kar.. mat kar… aukat me rah… lekin nahi… waise real me kafi difficult situations thi… ”

“God always put me in difficult situations because he knows I’ll handle it… ”

“solid…”

“so, this is the end of The Great Arman…”

“maybe… or maybe not. I know, what you know… and if you don’t know, how the hell I’ll know..”

“fine…”maine like ka symbol bana kar Arun se kaha, jiska saaf matlab tha ki hum dono ka mood is samay bahut kharab tha aur… aur jyada chutiyapa kisi ek ke liye bhari pad sakta hai… isliye Arun ne ek cigarette sulgayi aur mere paas, mere bagal me aakar chup-chap khada ho gaya….

Hum dono Esha ko dekh rahe the… par hum dono ki feelings me kafi antar tha… par main Esha ko dekhkar kya feel kar raha hoon, wo Arun mere bagal me khada hokar feel kar sakta tha… infact is samay mere hostel me mauzood har ladka apni khidki ke paas khada hokar Esha ko dekh raha tha aur un sabke andar wahi feelings daudne lagi thi jo mere andar daud rahi thi… is samay un sabke dil me Esha ke liye beinteha mohabbat thi… 

"Why you did it... what did you want to prove"

"I wanted to save the humanity"
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Meri hamesha se ek ichchha thi ki Esha mere saamne rahe aur main use ghanto dekhta rahu… bina palak jhapkaye, bina kuch kahe… bas aisich dekhta rahu aur aaj meri wo wish itne saal baad puri ho rahi thi… aaj mere paas bharpoor samay tha aur uske paas bhi. Na toh aaj use mujhse door le jaane wala Gautam tha aur na hee Arun mujhe us-se door kar raha tha… ye mere liye perfect duniya thi… par kab tak. Sawal toh ab bhi wahi hai ki… kya main zinda hoon ? Aur yadi haan toh kis halat me ?
..
..

“hiiii….”Esha ke bagal me baith kar maine muskurate hue kaha… 

“ajeeb hai… tum ab bhi muskura rahe ho…”

“khoobsurat ladkiyo ko dekhkar main apne aap muskurane lagta hoon.. ye default feature hai mere andar... pahle bhi ye hota tha aur aaj bhi yahi hota hai… daru,cigarette ke baad yahi meri khayal se ek aisi aadat hai jisne mera sath nahi chhoda…. Love you”

“main tumhe pyar nahi karti… tum ye jaante ho aur na hee kabhi karungi… phhir bhi….”

“kya fark padta hai…”

“ghoomne chale….”apna hath meri taraf badha kar Esha boli…

“kaha…”uska hath pakad kar maine pel ke dabaya… jis-se usne apna hath chhuda liya….

“ye kya kar…”

“ye kaam mera hai… matlab pahle mujhe hath badhana chahiye, tumhe nahi… isich liye…”

“aise hee tumne Shweta ka proposal reject kar diya tha… kyunki usne tumhe pahle propose kiya tha…”

“according to me… Love is cross product, I mean… A x B ≠ B x A.isiliye direction change nahi honi chahiye… friendship me aisa ho sakta hai kyunki wo dot product hai… A.B = B.A”apna hath uski taraf badhakar maine kaha “ghoomne chale….”
Aur badle me Esha bhi mere hath ko jor se dabane lagi lekin jab maine koyi reaction nahi diya toh wo apne dono hatho se mere hath ko dabane lagi.. par main muskurata raha… aisa nahi hai ki mujhe dard nahi hua dard toh mujhe hua… par main sah gaya…. aur finally haar mankar Esha hasne lagi….

“toh kaha chale….”khade hokar wo puchhi.. lekin maine koyi jawab nahi diya… wo ek aur baar puchhi… lekin maine is baar bhi koyi jawab nahi diya….

“Armaaaan… kuch bolte kyun nahi…”

Jiska maine phhir se koyi jawab nahi diya… aur teen baar mere koyi jawab na dene se Esha ko apni galti ka ahsaas hua aur wo wapas bench par baithi…. Jiske baad main utha aur Esha se puchha…

“toh kaha chale…”

“maine suna tha ki first year ke ladke ragging se bachne ke liye ek khufiya raaste se jungle-jhadi ke beech se college jaya karte the… kya ye sach hai…”

“hundred one percent… main khud gaya tha kayi din aur us saal ye aakhiri baar hua tha kyunki next year jab Sidar college se gaya toh maine wo raasta band karwa diya aur jo non-hosteler seniors first year ki ragging lete the un sabko maine samjha diya ki aaj ke baad college me kahi bhi ragging nahi hogi… par ye maine aane wale naye ladke-ladkiyo ke liye nahi kiya tha… mujhe toh bas un seniors ko marne ka bahana chahiye tha, isliye main khud first year ke ladko ko pahle unse bhidwata aur phhir unko fodta…”

“toh kya hua, tumhare iraade chahe jo bhi rahe ho… par college me ragging toh band ho hee gayi thi… us samay tum mujhe bahut achchhe lagte the… par phhir tumne Gautam ko hostel me……..”bolte hue Esha ruki… 

Wo do tarike se ruki… bolte hue bhi aur chalte hue bhi… kamal hai, mujhe toh hawa tak nahi laga ki hum chalte hue baat kar rahe the ya phhir baat karte hue chal rahe the…. mujhe toh yahi laga tha ki main ab bhi hostel ke saamne bench ke paas khada hoon….

“Gautam ko maine jaan-buchkar nahi mara tha… wo khud 15-20 ladko ko lekar hostel me hostelers ko marne ghusa tha…. par usne ye nahi socha ki us hostel me 200 ladke the…”

“aur wo sab… mera matlab wo pure 200 ladke Gautam aur uske dost ko marne aa gaye the…? kitne bewkoof the na wo sab… mera matlab un 200 me se 190 ko toh ye bhi nahi pata raha hoga ki kis baat par ladayi ho rahi hai… lekin phhir bhi wo kood pade…”

“mere.. tumhare... Gautam ke aane se pahle hee hostel me ek niyam banaya gaya tha ki galti chahe kisi ki bhi ho… yadi hostel ka ladka ladayi me shamil hai toh sab uska sath dene jayenge aur jo aisa nahi karega use phhir baad me milkar hostel ke sabhi ladke marenge….”

“aur sabne maan liya…?”

“nahi… do-char ko us samay marna pada tha… jiske baad hostelers ki ladayi me sab shamil hone lage…. Waise bhi meri gulami karne ki bahut logo ne shapath li thi... ”ek kaantedar jhadi ko uthakar maine kaha… “iske andar ghuso… wo raasta yahi se aage jata hai…”

“kya… yaha toh ghutno ke bal chalna padega… tum aage chalo… yadi main aage chali toh tum kahi peechhe se…..”

Sunkar main muskuraya…. Shri Arman par shaq… par kar bhi kya sakte the.. main ghutno ke bal baitha aur dono hath zameen par rakhkar aage badhne laga aur mere peechhe Esha….

“kafi sangharsh kiya tum logo ne… first year me”

“abhi aisa lag raha hai, us samay aise chalne me bahut maza aata tha… ek baar maine aise hee mere aage chal rahe Arun ke pichhwade me kaskar ek laat maari thi aur wo saamne wali jhadi me muh ke bal gira tha… Uska chehra us din dekhne layak tha… yaha se right aur ye bahar…”khada hokar apne kapde jhadte hue maine kaha… 

“first year me humare kapde aise hee gande hote the, is karan hum logo ne kapde dhone band kar diye the ki… kya fayda kapde dhone ka… gande toh waise bhi hone hai aur college wale sochte the ki hostel ke ladke bahut gande, jaanwaro ki tarah rahte hai…”

“ye peechhe wala darwaja hai… hai na…? workshop ke paas wala… yaha maine ek baar Vibha mam ko kuch ladkiyo ke sath dekha tha… jo hostel se aane wale first year ke ladko se bahut bura bartaav kar rahi thi… tumhe Vibha mam yaad toh hai na… jo us samay final year me thi, jab hum first year me the…”
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Vibha mam… Vibha…Vi+bha… Vibha… use kaise bhool sakta hoon main…. Wo jab yaha se sab chhod-chhad ke ja rahi thi... tab usne mujhe railway station bulaya tha... par main kabhi gaya nahi... jispar wo mujhe railway station se call karke boli..

"Kya boli..."

"Unke last words the..... Fuck you, Arman"

"Not surprised... aur unke pahle shabd kya the..."

"Pahle shabd..... yaad karta hoon"

((“oye maa de ladlo… kaha bhage ja rahe ho idhar aao…”jin ladkiyo ko main thodi der pahle swarg ki apsara samajh kar line marna chahta tha wo ab nark ki chudail ban chuki thi… aur unme se ek Vibha thi…

“yes..yes mam…”paseene se tar-batar hokar maine kaha… jiske jawab me Vibha ne mere muh me cigarette ghused di… maine peechhe mud kar Arun ko dekha, is ummid me ki shayad usme thodi-bahut himmat hogi… par wo toh mujhse bhi jyada dara hua tha… phattu, sala

“kyun be lawdo, kya socha tha ki peechhe se aaoge toh bach jaoge… dildo lagakar gand marenge hum tumhari…. Chalo, jhuko..”))

“Armaaaan…”mujhe hilate hue Esha boli

“Vibha…. Wahi na, Sidar ki crush…. Got it… wahi jise Sidar full left side se pyar karta tha par wo har saal fail hone wale Varun se set thi…. dekha jaye toh Sidar ki story bhi kuch-kuch meri tarah thi… meri jagah Sidar bhai the, Tumhari jagah Vibha aur Gautam ki jagah Varun… unhone Varun ko Varun ki class me hee ghuskar mara tha… thik waise jaise maine Gautam ko mara tha…. us samay main college me nahi tha par main aksar us ghatna ki kalpana kiya karta tha ki kaise hua hoga wo sab…. jab Sidar bhai third year me the aur Varun final year me… Sidar, final year ki class me chasma-vashma lagakar... gali-vali dete hue role se gaya aur phhir pure final year ki claas ki saamne Varun ko jhapad-e-jhapad pela… unko bhi Vibha nahi mili aur mujhe bhi… mera matlab story lagbhag-lagbhag same hai bas mere case me pyar jyada tha, dushmani jyada thi, khoon jyada baha aur anjaam kafi bura nikla….”

“toh tum muskura kyun rahe ho… tumhe toh udas hona chahiye…”

“maine kaha na ki, tumhe dekhkar ye apne aap hota hai… kafi practice kiya karta tha hostel me main iski… ki... andar chale…? ”

“college ke andar… kaha…”

“wahi… apne lover point pe.”

“canteen…”

College ke peechhe wale gate se workshop se hote hue Civil, Electrical department ko cross karke main aur Esha Mechanical Department me pahuche…. Aur apni final year ki class ko dekhne laga… andar hod sir heat and mass transfer ki class le rahe the… maine class ke andar nazar dali… toh mere kayi sare dost mujhe andar dikhe aur phhir wo ladkiya jinki char saal tak maine khoob bajayi…

“I know all of them…”garv se maine kaha

"Then why none of them are with you now. I think you were the only one in the whole college, who got nothing. no friends, no love… all you got is Vengence, anger, frustration… why do you have so less”

“because I was the best…”

“that went right over my head…Do you mind explaining it again? ”

“I mean… I am the best that’s why I have the less…”canteen me Esha ke liye chair kheechkar maine kaha..

“I got the better one…. you’re nothing that’s why you have nothing…”

“l got the best one…. I’m everything that’s why I have everything… look around Esha…"

"This is not real... Arman, and not likely to happen"

"Not as far as i know but maybe in future... anyway, just think of what you want and canteen wala will serve you…”

“do frootie… one doughnut….. wow.. Arman, ye kitni jaldi aa gaya order leke… main jab kal Divya ke sath aayi thi toh itni jaldi mera order leke nahi aaya tha”

“you’re with The Originator…”Esha ke top ko kheechkar uske top se apna goggle saaf karte hue maine order mara “one quarter, one packet cigarette and …. Kya… aise kyun dekh rahi ho… nahi…? thik hai phhir… daru, cigarette cancel… ”kahkar maine Esha ke muh se frootie chheeni aur peene laga…. 

“tumhari aankhe yaha pahle se jyada bhoori hai…. ”ek saans me pura frootie gatakne ke baad maine kaha...qQ

“aur tum yaha pahle se jyada achchhe ho… funny, sensible, lovable….”

“funny.... sensible.... lovable..Was not I in college ? main college me bhi aisa tha… par meri ragging ne sab kuch badal diya… us din mere andar jo nafrat paida hui, wo kabhi khatam hee nahi hui… maine un sabse apna badla liya lekin meri nafrat kam hone ke bajay badhti hee gayi aur itani jyada badh gayi ki isne mere andar ke insaan ko hee khatam kar diya…. par kis liye aur kab tak… why I hate everyone…? You never know what will happen to you and what you will become ”

“okay… Arman. Time to go…”

“tum aise nahi ja sakti..”

“sab kuch tumhara decided hai… tum kisi ek se bore na ho jao, isliye tumne apna time divide karke rakha hua hai… kuch mere liye, kuch apne dosto ke liye aur kuch…”

“aur kuch… ?”

“Gautam ke liye…. Bye…”

“par Gautam yaha, kaise aa sakta hai… yaha na toh Aradhna aa sakti hai aur Na hee Gautam… phhir kaise…..Esha… Esha…”

"Take care, Arman... see you later, Alligator "
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“teri item gayi be… ab kis-se baat kar raha hai….”kisi ne ek mukka bahut jor se mere sar me mara….

“teri behan ka….............. Arun tu…”

“bhosdike… hod ki class me tha main… madarchod ne pura dimag choos liya… paralyzed ho gaya tha main, ek class aur attend karta toh glucose chadhana padta… sab teri vazah se hua… na tu Esha se itni der baad karta aur na hee hum hod ki class me kaid hote… lawde ke baal, bahut bhayankar game khel raha hai tu.. jo itna bhayankar arrangement karke rakha hai khud ke liye aur Esha ke liye…. Na toh lawda use tere gravity-energy ke combo ke karan koyi chhoo sakta hai aur na hee jab wo tere sath ho toh tum dono ko koyi disturb kar sakta hai…. itna dimag yadi padhayi me lagakar kuch ban gaya hota toh Esha ka baap Esha ke sath-sath Esha ki maa ki bhi shadi tere sath kara deta…. Waise ye tune kiya kaise..."

“psychosics hai... tere samajh me nahi aayega..."

"Ye kya hai be.."

"Psychology+Physics "

"Toh tu ab apne words bhi banane laga..."

"Yaha main apni alag duniya bana le raha hoon aur tu words pe pada hai... khair, tu ye bata ki... ye Gautam ka kya lafda hai… ”

“ Gautam ko toh tu khud yaha lane wala hai… aur shayad R.Aradhna ko bhi…. Exact kisi ko kuch nahi pata… ”

“main kyun launga us bhosdiwale ko… main toh chahta hoon ki Gautam, is college me toh kya is universe me hee kahi na rahe…”

“tere bore hone ki aadat…. Aur kisliye. Tu humse jab bore ho jayega tab tu Gautam ko bhi yaha entry de dega… waise bhi Gautam ke bina tera wazood nahi hai, kyunki yadi wo nahi hota toh Esha is college me nahi aati… Esha college me nahi aati, toh tu uske liye pagal nahi hota aur yadi tu uske liye pagal nahi hota toh tu aaj waha hota jaha tujhe hona chahiye tha, na ki waha jaha tu aaj hai…”

“aur yaha Esha hai, isliye Gautam college me aayega…”

“correct… Arman ke bina Esha ka wazood ho sakta hai, lekin Esha ke bina Arman ka nahi…. isliye Gautam yaha aayega aur ek baat jo main aaj puri tarah samjha hoon ki kyun yaha koyi nahi mar sakta… tune ye isliye kiya taaki tu Gautam ko marte dum tak maar sake par wo mare na… balki thik ho jaye aur phhir dusare din tu use marte dum tak maar sake…. Par yadi iska ulta hua toh…? Yadi Gautam ne kisi tarah hume hara diya aur tujhe rojana marte dum tak mara toh….”

“bitch please, I’m The Originator…”

“dekh le… baki Gautam ke dosto ka college me gang ban chuka hai…. wo bas Gautam ke aane ka intezaar kar rahe hai… unka manna hai ki abhi unconscious state me pada tera brain... jab highly unstable hoga matlab koyi control nahi hoga... tab ek moment aisa aayega jab Gautam ko yaha la patkega.... baki chut-chudan mujhe nahi pata... mujhe sirf do kaam aata hai.. marna aur chodna.. pahle bhi yahi karta tha ab bhi yahi karunga... charo dishao me mutth marne wala aadmi hoon main... record darj hai mere naam..."

"Arun... A-Run... Ambitious Run..."
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Special thanks to the_lost_love for suggesting me full form of AR-Man and A-Run. Love you bro and thank you everyone like before 

"Arun... A-Run... Ambitious Run.. anyway... Gautam yaha kabhi nahi aayega….”

“main bhi yahi chahta hoon.. ab aur ladayi nahi. kafi achchha mahol hai college ka. Par yadi wo yaha aaya toh tension mat lena main sare laundo ko taiyar kar raha hoon…. Maa chod denge unki is baar…. Workshop ki Lathe machine me katenge sabko… by the way.. i've a news which will ruin your life….”

“Mi aikat aahe...”

“Rajshri Pandey is here….”

“RP bhi aa gaya.... kaha hai…”Arun ke aage-peechhe, daye-baye… upar- neeche dekh kar maine puchha…

“abey yaha nahi hai.… neeche kya dekh raha hai ab kya wo mere lawde se niklega... hostel me hai….”

“wait….”

"Kahe ka wait..."

“aur Arman bhai…”peechhe se mujhe aawaz dekar Rajshri Pandey mere saamne aaya aur apni trademark harqat karne laga…

Rajshri ne ek Rajshri Gutkhe ka pouch fada aur phhir Rajshri ke sath milne wale tobacco ka pouch bhi fadne laga…

“kya bolte ho Arman bhai, aaj kha hee lo… Rajshri….”

“chal be… mera koyi level-vevel hai ki nahi.. jo main rajshri kha loon”

“Arun bhai… aap logo…”

“laa lawda, aaj try maar hee leta hoon…”

Itna sunte hee Rajshri Pandey ke andar itna josh aaya ki usne turant tobacco Rajshri ke pouch ke andar dalkar tobacco ko supari ke sath milaya aur ek dose apne muh me bharkar Arun ki taraf packet badha diya… 

“lo, Arun bhai… peg maro…”

“tum log khate hee ho toh, Rajshri kyun khate ho… kuch level wali chiz khaya karo..…”

“main explain karta hoon..”wahi ek ladki ke gaal par Rajshri thook kar RP bola… “dekho Arman bhai… jis tarah har ore ...mineral hota hai, lekin har mineral... ore nahi.. jis tarah har iphone ... mobile hota hai, lekin har mobile ....iphone nahi… thik usi tarah har Rajshri .... gutkha hota hai, lekin har gutkha... rajshri nahi… Rajshri ki baat hee alag hai, kyun Arun bhai…”

“aur nahi toh kya…”bagal wale table me, jiske gaal me RP ne abhi-abhi rajshri thooka tha, usi ki glass me Arun ne rajshri thooka aur usi ladki ka dupatta kheechkar apna muh pochhne laga….

Dupatta ladki ke kandhe par safety pin se fit tha aur Arun ke is tarah jhatka dekar duatta kheechne se uski dress fat gayi aur wo ab Arun ko ghoor kar dekh rahi thi…. 

“ghoor kya rahi hai bahinchod… yahi pe patak ke chodunga… yakin na aaye toh apne bagal wali se puchh.. 4-5 baar chhat par le jakar chod chuka hoon usko… samajh nahi aa raha kya, lawdi tere ko….. ajeeb gand-mari hai, ghoorna band hee nahi kar rahi… dekh… aakhiri baar bol raha hoon, ghoorna band kar… warna mahtari chod dunga”

“chup be chutiye… jo mann me aaye bolta rahta hai… samajh kya rakha hai tune college ki ladkiyo ko.. jis din hum apni pe aaye na toh nanga karke college me ghumayenge aur aakhir me lund kaat denge…”

“Arun… hahaha..”Arun ki taraf dekhkar main aur RP hase… 

“tu kya has raha hai…”Arun ne mujhse puchha

“tujhpe has raha hoon, dekha nahi kaise us ladki ne teri utari…”

“tujhe sach me lagta hai ki us ladki ne wo mujhe kaha… zara dhyan se dekh toh…”

“dhyan se dekh ka kya matlab… pahle tune uski udayi aur phhir usne teri… simple…”cigarette muh me fasate hue maine us ladki ki taraf dekha… wo ladki Arun ko nahi balki mujhe hee ghoor kar dekh rahi thi…. maine Rajshri Pandey ko dekha , wo bhi mujhe hee dekh kar has raha tha… 

“very good… ab cigarette ka filter dekh…”

Maine waisa hee kiya aur dekha ki cigarette me laal rang laga hua tha… phhir mujhe ahsaas hua ki Rajshri main kha raha hoon, Arun nahi… aur jo thodi der pahle hua wo maine kiya tha… maine us ladki ke gaal par Rajshri kha-kar peek mari thi aur maine hee uska dupatta pakad-kar kheencha tha, jiske bad uske kapde fat gaye the… us ladki ne mujhe hee reply diya tha aur mere hee lCund ko kaatne ki dhamki di thi…

Maine pani ka jug uthaya aur us ladki ke muh par pani feka aur haste hue Arun ki taraf dekha…

“nahi..... pagal hai kya be…. Ye gande kaam main nahi karta… main iska rape bilkul nahi karunga…”

“really…”

“tera badla… tu hee lena…”

“badla main hee le raha hoon… RP idhar aa, baith ke maza lete hai…”

Jiske baad Arun apni jagah se utha aur us ladki ke kapde fadkar use canteen me ek kinare le gaya… jiske baad mujhe us ladki ki cheekhe sunayi di… Maine kafi enjoy kiya un cheekho ko… mera matlab ekdum mood hee fresh ho gaya… phhir jab wo cheekhe shant hui toh main samajh gaya ki lund ghus chuka hai. Tab mujhe andar se thoda bura laga ki ye maine Arun se kya karwa diya… khud toh paapi tha hee, Arun ko bhi paapi bana diya. isi beech Rajshri Pandey ne rajshri ka ek au packet fada…

“Arman, ye tune achchha nahi kiya… tune mujhe mazboor kiya, mere dimag ko control kiya aur…. ye sab haqiqat me bhale hee na ho.. Arman….. par bhagwan tujhe kabhi maaf nahi karega…”

“aur na hee main kabhi bhagwan ko maaf karunga… why the hell he created me.”

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main apni jagah se utha, table ke neeche padi kulhadi uthayi aur jis ladki ko Arun ne abhi konte me lejakr pela tha… uske baal pakad kar use ghaseet-te hue canteen me sabke beech laya… phhir Arun aur RP ko mazboor kiya ki wo us ladki ke hath-pair pakde… taaki us ladki ko jab main zinda kaatu, toh mujhe koyi problem na ho…. 

“pel do, Arman bhai… ekich baar me kaam tamam hona chahiye…”

“hao…”

“ aap ruk kyun gaye… maro kutiya ko… aapse jubaan lada rahi thi.. arey phhir rook gaye…? ”

"Arey pelo na... ruke kyun ho. Kaat dalo lawdi ko... aaj isko bhun kar khayenge..."

"Phhir rok gaye... soch kya rahe ho..."

.

“rook be thoda… goggle laga loon, kya pata koyi video bana raha ho whatsapp... youtube me dalne ke liye…”

Maine goggle lagaya aur us ladki ke gardan par kulhadi se dheere-dheere kharoch kar ek nishan banaya ki mujhe yahi pe marna hai aur nishan banane ke baad pura dum lagakar us ladki ka gardan par kulhadi mara… mara toh maine pura dum lagakar.. par us ladki ki gardan puri tarah kati nahi… meri kulhadi uske gardan ke andar jakar phas gayi.. jiske baad na toh main kulhadi bahar nikal paa raha tha aur na hee uski bachi-kuchi gardan kaat pa raha tha… main jab bhi kulhadi ko thoda sa bhi idhar-udhar karta toh chhatpatate hue zameen me padi wo ladki aur chhat-patane lagti… jise dekh kar hum teeno kafi enjoy kar rahe the… Rajshri ne mere kahne par us ladki ki salwar utari aur phhir chaddi utar kar uski choot me apni ungali andar-bahar karne laga…

“lagta hai, mar gayi Arman bhai… ek bhi maza nahi aa raha…”

“choot chat ke dekh toh…”

“yukkk... mari hui ladki ka choot kaun chatega....”

“arey kuch nahi hoga… chal chaat…”

“thik hai phhir….”majbooran us ladki ki choot chatne ke liye RP ne apna muh us ladki ki choot ki taraf kiya…

Aur maine us ladki ke chehre par ek pair rakh-kar jhatka dete hue kulhadi uski gardan se nikali… aur is beech, jab Rajshri Pandey uski choot chat raha tha, jab Arun us ladki ki doodh daba raha tha… toh maine kulhadi hawa me uthayi aur pura jor lagakar us ladki ke gardan par phhir se de mara……. Jis-se us ladki ki sar uske dhadh se puri tarah alag ho gaya… maine us ladki ka sar uthaya aur table par rakh kar Canteen me mauzood sabhi logo ki taraf dekh kar kaha…

“I can forgive you for my murder but not for my insult... I’m the most ruthless, worthless and fearless creature you’ve ever met or you’ll ever meet. Even the devil is a kid infront of me… got it…? Now get lost… you ugly people.. I hate you all…”

Us ladki ki gardan kaatne ke baad main Canteen se akele nikla aur Esha ki class ki taraf jaane laga… bhale hee ye real me na hua ho.. par phhir bhi jo maine kiya tha.. jo bhi maine Arun aur RP se karwaya tha, usne mujhe sochne ke liye mazboor kar diya tha... main kaun hoon aur kya banta jaa raha hoon. Kya iska koyi ant nahi..? Aur yadi iska koyi ant nahi toh mujhe Ganga-jamuna kand ke baad zinda nahi bachna chahiye.. kyunki is duniya me mere aur mere jaise logo ke liye koyi jagah nahi... sawal ab bhi wahi hai ki... kab tak aur kis kimat par..?. jo log kahte hai.. jo naitikta aur insaniyat ki badi-badi baate karte hai... wo toh mujhe kahi dikhti hee nahi or i've lost my humanity and there is no hope to return.... 

Khair... main jaise hee canteen se nikalkar insaniyat ki taalash me Esha ke class ke bahar pahucha... tabhi uski class chhoot gayi, jaise professor ko maloom tha ki main kya chahta hoon aur usne class khatm kar di. Esha ki class se launde-laundiya bahar aane lage, unme se kayiyo ne mujhse hath milaya, kayiyo ne door se sirf hath dikhaya toh... kayiyo ne mujhe smile pass ki. Par kisi ne mujhe koyi advice nahi di… koyi salah nahi, koyi saleekha nahi… koyi gyan nahi ki... maine ye thik nahi kiya aur koyi gungaan nahi ki... maine kaise ek zinda ladki ko kaat dala...

main Esha ke class ke bahar thodi door pe khada tha. Esha ke class ke kayi launde-laundiyo ko main jaanta tha par unme se adhiktar aise the… jinhe main nahi jaanta tha, infact main unhe aaj pahli baar dekh raha tha. ya phhir kahi dekha hoga… par yaad nahi. thik usi tarah jis tarah sapne me kuch anjaan chehre dikhayi dete hai. bas fark itna tha ki mere case me ye bulk me tha, yaha anjaan chehre kuch jyada hee dikhayi de rahe the… main bhale hee un sabko nahi jaanta tha, par unme se aisa koyi nahi tha… jo mujhe na jaanta ho. chahe wo reality me mere college ke dino ki baat ho ya phhir yaha haqiqat me...I mean sapne me… upar se maine thodi der pahle jo canteen me gardan kaatne ka stunt kiya tha, wo un sabko mere through pata chal gaya hoga… isiliye, jinhe main jaanta tak nahi… wo bhi mujhe salaam thok rahe the. 

Kam shabdo me kahu toh ye mere liye perfect world tha. yaha kuch karibi logo ko chhod diya jaye toh koyi mujhe saalah nahi deta, sab saalam thok ke jaate hai… phhir chahe wo ladke ho ya ladki… yaha na toh Gautam tha aur na hee meri sabse jyada gand fadne wali Aradhna… infact wo har jagah jaha Gautam aur Aradhna na ho par Esha ho… wo jagah mere liye perfect hai, phhir chahe mujhe R.Divya ki respect hee kyun na karna pade… 

sabse jyada professors ki gand fati hui thi. kyunki college me toh phhir bhi meri koyi limit thi… lekin yaha…………Kul milakar ye jagah mujhe kafi raas aa rahi thi aur yadi yaha rahne ke liye mujhe marna bhi pade toh main khushi-khushi katta apne mathe par rakh kar trigger daba dunga… par abhi main sure nahi hoon ki marne ke baad main yaha hamesha ke liye rah paunga… jis din ye confirm hua, us din E= mc2 formula ki kasam ki main suicide kar lunga… jisme 5th dimension wale ki help lene padegi..
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Yahi sab sochate hue Esha ki class ke bahar khada main Esha ka intezaar karta raha… main pahle bhi aisa kiya karta tha, matlab college ke dino me bhi… par us samay ye sab main chhip ke kiya karta tha aur pure chaar saal chhip-chhip ke kiya lekin aaj…. Lekin aaj main khullam-khulla kar raha tha. thodi der baad Esha apne class se bahar aayi.. par wo akeli nahi thi, uske sath R.Gautam ki behan R.Divya bhi thi… 

“jo tumne abhi kiya… wo hum sabne dekha. Wo thik nahi tha. tum yaha bhi waise hee ho.. jaise college me hua karte the…. sniffy, egotistic, self-loving, self-conceited, swollen-headed, vain and…. ”main jaise hee Esha ke paas pahucha wo boli… cheekhte hue boli aur mujhe waha se jaane ke liye kaha…

“ I’m no more that crappy, arrogant, swollen-headed person I used to be… now I’m awesome, astonishing, mind-blowing, charming, entertaining and thrilling… and if people cant handle me, then they must die.. just like that girl died in canteen”

“allow my brother and he’ll tell you who must die… you chose us… okay. Fine...but without my brother ? without any difficulty…? how coward you are.. Arman… you knew.. you knew that if my brother was here... Esha wouldn’t even spit on your face”mujhpar haste hue R.Divya boli… 

"That's an interesting interpretation... do you mind walking me through your logic?.. or, you've forgotten me completely... ?. I love the difficult things as well as your baklol brother Gautam, You know…why…? because it gives me chance to know myself…to know my abilities, my weakness… my cruelty… and soon you’ll know it too. don’t worry”

“I’m not worried, you dickhead… we just saw what you do when you lose.. I mean She just replied to your blashphemy and when you… you got nothing to support yourself… you just cut her throat..? and your this act proved that… once a failure, always a failure….”

“you’re right… I’m a failure, I know it very well. I know, My whole life was a failure… is a failure but have you ever seen any sign of failure in my face ? .. the answer is… NO and here I become The Invicible, The Inviteble. Randi Divya…. sorry for my harsh words but I do the things which I like, which makes me happy and trust me, I’ll do it forever”

“see… I was right, Arman… no matter how you show yourself.. at the end you will end up as a bad person…”

“bad..?.. no… Version 1.0 was bad, 2.0 was worse but 3.0 is worst… yani ki main. now one question…have you ever seen the use of three forms of adjectives in a better way.”

“wo toh waqt batayega, jab mera bhai Gautam yaha aayega… college me gang banna shuru ho chuka hai…”

“aur wo aayega kaise… mere bina toh wo aa hee nahi sakta…”

“yahi toh tumne Aradhna ke baare me bhi socha tha na.. par wo toh aa gayi. Maine use aaj college me dekha.”

“Almost surely impossible…”

“mujhe bhi yahi lagta tha, par jab Aradhna ko aaj college me dekhi toh meri ummid jaag gayi… jiski vazah shayad real world me tumhari behoshi ya maut ho sakti hai… jaha tumhara tumhare dimag par koyi control nahi… jis tarah se Aradhna aayi hai, usi tarah se Gautam bhi aa sakta hai…”

“thik hai… suppose ki Gautam aa gaya. phhir uske baad kya… i'm damn Originator..., yaha toh wo mujhe chhoo bhi nahi sakta, lekin main….. Isliye uske liye yahi behtar hoga ki wo yaha na aaye, warna roj uska sar, dhad se alag karunga…”

“jaisa ki maine pahle hee kaha hai ki ab yaha zaroori nahi ki wahi ho… jo tum sochoge… tumhara dimag hee tumhare khilaf ho jayega… thanx to your counterpart 4.0.. who came from some 5 dimensional world.. ”

“ye kya tha…”aas-paas hone wali aawazo ko sunkar maine Divya se puchha… uske agle hee pal mera dum ghutne laga… maine apna sar dono hatho se dabaya aur jor-jor se saans lene ki koshish karne laga lekin main saans nahi le paya… balki.. jab maine saans lene ki koshish ki toh mujhe aisa laga jaise main pani ke andar saans lene ki koshish kar raha hoon aur waisa hee affect bhi… 

Par ye sirf mera vaham nahi tha… main sach me pani ke andar tha… jiska andaza mujhe tab hua, jab maine apni aankh kholi. Main kisi taalab ya phhir nadi ke andar tha… mujhe pata nahi ki ye achanak location change kaise hui par main is waqt gahre pani me tha aur mera dum ghut raha tha… maine khud ko concentrate kiya aur aankh band karke upar aane laga….

“iski...... maaa... ka…”pani se bahar aakar maine jab charo-taraf dekha toh bola 
“sala..ye toh samundar hai… aur thik hostel se sata hua bhi… nahi, actually ye pure college ke charo taraf hai… ye toh maine kabhi nahi socha tha. phhir kaise…? kahi Divya sach toh nahi bol rahi thi ki mera, mere dimag me koyi control nahi hai.. kahi Gautam sach me toh nahi aane wala…?”

Hairan-pareshan main Samundar se bahar nikal-kar kinare tak aaya aur kinare par aakar let gaya… ye bhale hee maine na socha ho par tha ye gazab ka… matlab maine ye kyu nahi socha… Samundar me bahta hua mera goggle bhi waves ke through kinare tak aaya, jise maine pakda aur goggle lagakar wahi kinare me leta raha…. Par main waha akela nahi tha. waha Esha bhi thi…. wo bhi bikni me. waise toh maine Esha ke baare me kabhi us tarah se nahi socha… par abhi use dekhte hee mera lund khada ho raha tha… wo wahi mere bagal me baithi aur muskurane lagi…

“kahi isne mera khada hua lund toh nahi dekh liya… tabhi ye itna muskura rahi hai...”
Aur Mera aisa sochna hee tha ki Esha ne mere underwear ki taraf dekha aur dekhte hee ek baar phhir muskurayi…

“dhattt… main na hee ye sochta aur na hee use mere through pata chalta ki main kya soch raha hoon aur na hee wo idhar dekhti…”

“koyi baat nahi, Arman… normal hai ye...”

Chapter-35: Breakdown

“normal…? Haan.. normal hee hai ye... thik usi tarah jaise tum logo ko periods aate hai…”

“ok. That was unexpected... ye normal nahi hai.. mera matlab periods aana normal hai, lekin use aise example dekar kahna… ye normal nahi hai.. tumhe nahi kahna chahiye tha…”

“main toh bas explain kar raha tha…”

“anyway, tumhe swimming aati hai…”

“mujhe kya nahi aata…. Bhagwan se jyada talented hoon main…”

“ohkay… waise name kya hai is sea ka..”

“iska naaaaame… ............. Engineer’s Sea”

"You figured that out fast. That's really nice. DYNAMITE !..”

“See the Sea… Esha…”

“I’m”

“Don’t you think seas are great place to commit suicide...”

“dont know... "

"You should go now.. "Arun ko aata dekh maine kaha..

"see you later, alligator...”
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"See you later, alligator... badhiya rhyming hai.. tu bhi bol diya kar... see you soon, my moon... lol.."hatheli me gaanja malte Arun bola...“waise... maine suna ki aaj Divya ne tujhe thik waisi hee dhamki di, jaise college ke dino me diya karti thi…”

" Is duniya me aise bahut hee kam log hai.. jo mujhe dhamki nahi dete… par main unko jyada seriously nahi leta kyunki… "

"Haan kyunki... tu galat ho sakta hoon lekin kamzor nahi.... like a monster…”

“ monster..? main monster nahi hoon... par pata hai monster kaun hai ? maine unhe dekha hai. wo log pura valentine week celebrate karte hai. chocolate day me chocolate dete hai, teddy bear day me teddy bear day dete hai, phhir last me hug dete hai… mera matlab how foolish, gandul, immature they are… they are the real monsters. Aise logo ko dekh ke rooh kaanp jati hai meri aur yahi vazah hai ki aliens humse kabhi nahi milte… inhi burchatto ki vazah se… mera vash chale toh in sabko nanga karke aapas me inka pond se pond ladwau…”

“abey wo toh bahana rahta hai… haqiqat me adhiktar log ye nahi karna chahte par isi ke jariye unhe wo raasta milta hai, jaha wo apna lund dalna chahte hai. Par hum dono iske liye nahi bane the... ya phhir tu bhi ye sab karta yadi Esha tujhe line deti toh… par tu ye kar nahi paya… shayad isiliye jo ye kar rahe hai tu unhe khunnas me bak raha hai…. tera Daru ne utna nuksaan nahi kiya jitna Esha ne bina kuch kare kar diya… bahut bada chutiya nikla be tu, Arman… hum sochte the, hum me se sabse pahle tu bada aadmi banega par ab toh tu aadmi ban-ne ke bhi layak nahi bacha… par ab bhi waqt hai… mujhe allow kar, main tujhe Esha se mukti dila dunga… just allow me to pass that gravity-energy barrier, you made around her ”chilam me gaanja bharkar apna hath jhadte hue Arun bola...

“that will lead you to your extinction and by the way.. I’m addicted to her. now, either I’ll get her or I’ll kill her… there isn't any third option.”

“first wala toh bhool ja… kyunki kuch chize zindagi me kabhi nahi badalti… upar se wo aise logo ke beech rahti hai jo tujhse beinteha pyar karte hai, jaise Divya… wo Sona…”

“Sona…… Sona…. S+ O+ Na… Sulphur… Oxygen… Sodium… Sona kaun be…”

“jab Aradhna ne suicide kiya tha yad hai…”

“wo toh main agle janam me bhi yad rakhunga….”

“toh phhir jab wo critical condition me hospital me admit thi… tab main, tu aur RP Apollo hospital gaye the… yaad kar…”

“yaad hai…”

“waha phhir hospital ke bahar girls hostel ki ek laundi tujhe jhadne aayi thi… yaad kar…”

“hostel ki laundi…. … rook ek minute… Sona… Sooooonaaaaaa…. Yani gold..”

((Arun ke karan main chup ho gaya.Sona humare paas aakar kuchh der tak apne kamar me hath rakhkar mujhe ghoorti rahi aur main kabhi baye dekhta toh kabhi daye... .maine kuchh der tak intezaar kiya ki wo mujhe ab gali degi...ab gali degi. lekin jab wo mujhe kuchh bolne ke bajay sirf ghoorati rahi to main bola...

"Ab bolegi bhi... Bol na... jo bolna hai...."

"sharam aa rahi hai thodi ,bahut..."

"Thodi si..."

"disgusting....jab se Aradhna ke suicide ke bare me uske papa ko pata chala hai, unhe hosh tak nahi...idhar Aradhna apni zindagi se lad rahi hai aur udhar uske papa....kya bigada tha usne tera, jo use aisa karne par majboor kar diya.jab pyar tha hee nahi ,tab kyun uske sath sambandh rakha tune....bloody hell...."
.

"idhar dekh idhar..."bolkar Sona ne dusari taraf dekh rahe mere chehre ko apne hatho se pakad kar apni taraf kiya....

"teri maa ka lawda... madarchod... chodri... hath kaise lagaya be tune.. .jyada kachar-kachar karegi toh yahi dhar ke kachar dunga... bol toh aise rahi hai jaise maine khud ne chuhe marne wali dawa laakar use diya aur bola ho ki'le kha aur mar ja'...khud to dus-dus lawde apne gand me lekar chalti hai aur mujhe yaha aakar naseehat de rahi hai....bhool gayi lawdi... pichhale saal jab ek ladka tere karan Yashwant se maar khaya tha. sali khud to kayi ladko ki zindagi barbaad kar di aur yaha mujhe suna rahi hai... choddari kahi ki"

is beech Arun ne mera hath dabana jaari rakha taaki main chup ho jaun...

"hath chhod be tu...ise aaj goli de hee deta hoon, bahut shan-patti kar rahi hai apun se....tune kya socha tha ki tu yaha aayegi aur mujhe chamka kar apne saheliyo ke saamne deenge hakegi... ki... 'girls.. i just bashed Arman.. wow.. awwww... aahhh...aaahhhhhhhh '......wo aur ladke hote honge... jinpar tu hukumat karti hogi...mujhse thoda door hee rahna...warna jab Police mere paas aayegi toh tera naam le lunga aur kahunga ki... tune mujhe aisa karne ke liye kaha tha...ab chal nikal lawda.. yaha se..."

"maine sahi suna tha tere baare me...tujhe ladkiyo se baat karne ki tameej nahi hai..."

" tujhe bahut tameej hai ladko se baat karne ki....sali........chodri kahi ki."

"abhi chahe kitna bhi akad le ,ye sab karke tujhe raat me bahut tension hogi.tujhe neend tak nahi aayegi...."

"Neend nahi aayegi toh kya hua.. tv series dekh lenge... lawda... tu chal ab.. pond utha ke bhag."

"how dare you..."

"aa gayi na apni aaukat pe...char saal me english ka sirf ek line sikhi hai ... 'how dare you'.... dum hai toh iske aage english me bol ke dikha...."

iske baad Sona kuchh nahi boli aur chup-chap udhar se jaane lagi....lekin main phhir bhi chillate hue bola..

"apne kaan ke sath apna sab kuchh khol ke sun le...ye sar sirf tirange ke aage jhukne ke liye bana hai...ladkiyo ke samane nahi aur tujh jaisi ladki ke samane to bilkul bhi nahi...agli baar se kisi ladke ko kuchh bolne se pahle soch lena kyunki har ladke tere boyfriends ki tarah jhandu nahi hote... kuchh jhande gadne wale bhi hote hai... aur sun tera payjama baye pond ke paas fata hua hai.. hath laga le.. hahaha"

"Arman bhai... lodh.."

"That's lol not lodh... chutiye.."

"Iska full form..?"

"Lol means.... Lots of lund"))

“achchha wo Sona… use kaise bhool sakta hoon main… maine use na chodne ki bajay Aradhna ko choda.. isliye wo bur maan gayi thi. mere khayal se Aradhna ki jagah wo mere liye suicide karna chahti thi… par use wo mauka nahi mila… sahi hai behanchod… isiliye Esha mujhse nahi pati kyunki chaubiso ghante toh wo Randi Divya aur chodri Sona ke sath rahti thi… waise tujhe pata hai kya ki is duniya ka sabse samajhdar insaan kaun hai…?”

Mere is sawal par Arun aise chup raha jaise usne kuch suna hee na ho ya phhir maine kuch kaha hee na ho… par sach ye dono nahi tha. wo actually gaanje me beedi patti mila raha tha…. 

"Arun... bata is duniya ka sabse samajhdar insan kaun hai..."

“kaha laga pada hai... lawda... lee machis maar…”mujhe machis dete hue Arun ne kaha aur chilam muh me fasaya...

Maine machis jalaya aur Arun ne chilam… bhaka-bhak do shot kheechne ke baad dhua mere muh me chhodte hue Arun bola…

“toh tu kuch samajhdar-vamajhdar insaan ki baat kar raha tha…”

“you know... who is the wisest man in this universe…”

“main aur kaun…”

“correct… but why…”

“tune ye sawal puchhte hue mera name socha isliye maine jawab de diya.. lekin reason tune daba ke rakha hai… in short, mujhe kya pata lawda…”

“kyunki tu kabhi pyar me nahi pada… who don’t love are the wisest…”

“bhosdike… maine kabhi pyar nahi kiya lekin itna zaroor maloom hai ki pyar kiya nahi jata, balki ho jata hai… isiliye... Esha nahi pati tujhse…”

“mere case me aisa nahi hai… mujhe pyar hua nahi tha… maine pyar kiya tha. update your baba aadam jamane ka quotes… what I want to say is it’s better to be alone than be a chutiya…”

“par tu toh dono hee hai… laundibazi me pagal hua… ghamand me kabhi basketball nahi khela aur hoshiyari me police se thuka lekin iske baad bhi shant nahi hua… socha ki ghar me bhi tu waise hee rahega… jaise college me rahta tha… isliye gharwalo ne bhi nikal diya… seriously Arman, tujhse bada chodu insaan maine zindagi me nahi dekha… main tere sirf ek chiz ki tareef karta tha wo tha tere basketball khelne ki ability ki… bc kya match tha wo… jab tune aakhir ke chanda minutes me dhada-dhad goal pel diya tha… jisme se do half court se bhi the… matlab meri toh gand hee fat gayi thi behanchod… bhagwan ne kya talent diya tha tujhe lekin”

“Don’t thank God….”

“kya…”

“don’t thank god… yadi tu mere bure kaam ke liye bhagwan ko doshi nahi manta toh phhir mere achchhe kaam ke liye bhagwan ko credit dena galat hai... yadi main basketball court me half court se basket karta hoon toh ye mera talent hai… na ki bhagwan ka… I made myself. Warna usne toh mujhe sabki tarah… goonga, bewkoof hee paida kiya tha…” maine kaha aur Arun muh faadkar suntan raha… is beech uski chilam bujh chuki thi…

Usne mujhe chilam pass ki aur machis jalane laga…

“tujhe pata hai… iski maa ka…”khaste hue maine kaha “tujhe pata hai.. bhagwan ne mujhe kyun paida kiya…”

“nahi...”

“dialogue marne ke liye…”khaste hue maine dialogue complete kiya

“aaram se khich be… waise chal… time ho gaya…”

“kis chiz ka…”

“party… aaj hostel me party hai… farewell party… kuch log bol rahe the ki 5th dimension wala teri conscious tujhe wapas dene wala hai... taaki tujhe maar sake”
______________________________

"Aur main yaha kab tak rahunga.. ye decide karne wala wo kaun hota hai..."

"Tujhe ab bhi lagta hai ki ise tu control kar raha hai...?"

"Aur nahi toh kya... i'm the damn Originator.."

"And who made you the damn Originator.. ? Tu samajh kyun nahi raha.. tu ise nahi jeet sakta... wo tujhe har jagah kaid kar raha hai... tu jitna aasan ise samajh raha hai.. itna aasan ye hai nahi... Khair, tu ye sab chhod.. aur farewell party me chal.. kuch toh aisa kar ki kuch chize toh aasan ho...“

"Not interested...."

"ladke-ladkiya sab allowed hai… aur jo nahi aayega chahe wo ladka ho ya ladki… sabko nanga karke hostel ke bahar murga banwaya jayega… aise farman maine jaari kiya hai… tere naam se…”

“matlab…. Arman ka farman…”

“yaa...”

“aise me yadi main hee nahi gaya toh meri sarasar bezzati ho jayegi... main chalunga..."apni jagah pe khada hokar maine kaha "chal phhir… izzat down nahi honi chahiye… 5th dimension wale ke baare me baad me sochunga... waise bhi mujhe yaha se bahar kaise nikalna hai.. ye pata hai ”

.

Maine ghadi me time dekha raat ke 9 baj rahe the… par aisa lag raha tha jaise din ke 9 baje ho. Arun ke sath main Engineer’s Sea se hostel ki taraf badhne laga…

“maine suna ki Aradhna aa chuki hai yaha…”

“do baar chod bhi chuka hoon use.. workshop me. kya tight gand hai be.. madarchod pahle toh ghus hee nahi raha tha. bahut royi, vinti ki… lekin main nahi ruka aur phhir jor se dhakka mara… tab andar gaya… Aradhna ki toh gand hee fat gayi…(literally)... jab tak choda tab tak roti rahi… phhir wahi workshop me band kar diya use… aaj ke baad roj uski gand marunga…”

“aur jab thak jaye toh boti-boti kar dena…”

“hat be… itni mast maal hai, tune use chhoda kyun..”

“gad-chataue... isiliye tu kabhi Shri Arman nahi ban paya…”

Main aur Arun Hostel pahuche… par humare pahuchne se pahle hee hostel ki chhat me party shuru ho chuki thi… matlab Originator ki koyi izzat hee nahi... ya phhir wo sab mere jaane se itne khush the ki mera intezaar hee nahi kiya. Well, hostel ki chhat pe dj baj raha tha… log naach rahe the aur main.. chadda, banyan pahankar upar chhat par pahucha… waha maine ek ladke ko pakad kar kheecha, jisne badhiya kapda pahna hua tha aur uske kapde utarwakar maine pahan liya… phhir maine goggle lagaya aur chilam muh me fasakar lighter mara aur chilam kheechte hue aage badha…

“Arman bhai… kya dikh rele ho… matlab ekdum fad…”

“rajshri khila…”RP ke sar pe chilam rakhkar maine kaha

“arey bilkul…”fatak se rajshri ka packet mujhe dekar RP bola…

"In logo ki tarah... Tu bhi mere jaane se khush hai kya be..."jispar RP ne koyi jawab nahi diya
.

“abey Arman… jise tune nanga kiya wo hostel ka launda tha…”

“toh…”

“abey toh… wo humari team ka hai aur tu use hee sabke saamne beizzat kar raha hai”

“main ab in chizo se upar uth chuka hoon.. mere liye sabhi jeev-jantu saman hai... uski jagah tu bhi hota toh main tujhe bhi nanga kar deta… chal baju hat… ”

Arun ko side karke main ladkiyo ke jhund ki taraf gaya.. jo apna gand fulaye… mera matlab gaal fulaye, shanti se ek oor baithi hui thi.. in short kahu toh wo Esha ka group tha. par waha Esha nahi thi… Divya aur Sona toh thi par Esha pata nahi kaha thi…

“Esha kaha hai be… Chodari”Sona ke baju wali ladki ke muh me rajshri thook kar maine kaha aur wo gusse se aankh fad-fad kar mujhe dekhne lagi… 

“harami…”

“yesss... yahi toh main chahta tha ki koyi mujhe bas motivate kar de aur gali sunkar main motivate ho jata hoon.. ”us ladki ka baal pakad kar maine use uthaya aur kayi baar gol-gol use ghoomane ke baad uski choot me pura dum lagakar ek laat mara.. 

"Aaaaaaaa..."

Wo waha peechhe rakhe sofe se takrayi aur dono hatho se apna choot pakad kar... apna choot dabate hue rone lagi….

"maza aa gaya behanchod… i always wanted to kick a vagina.."maine kaha aur gala fad kar hasne laga...

Us ladki ko rote hue apna chut dabate dekh mujhe itna maza aaya ki main uske paas gaya aur..... ek aur baar uski choot me pura dum lagakar laat mara…. Jiske baad wo ladki bahut ajeeb harqat karne lagi… uske choot me mere dusare laat ke karan uska muh fata ka fata rah gaya aur wo thodi der tak apna muh fade, apne choot ko dabaye ekdum waisich rahi… matlab na toh koyi aawaz aur na hee koyi reaction… matlab kuch der ke liye ekdum shocked ho gayi thi. lekin phhir wo itni jor se rone lagi ki... laga… kaan ke parde fat jayenge… 

“RP, iska gala kaat ke neeche fek… aur gala katne ke baad iske upar moot dena”
Rajshri Pandey kisi aagyakari shisya ki bhati fork lekar us ladki ke gardan me ghusa diya aur phhir fork se hee uski gardan fadne laga… 

"Gardan nahi kat raha, Arman bhai..."

"Ye le..." table par rakha chaku fek-kar dete hue maine kaha...

Jiske baad RP ne chakur aur fork ke combo se us ladki ki gardan ki jo slice nikali... wo dekhne layak tha. wo ladki bahut tadpi, bahut chillayi… yaha tak ki moot bhi di... par main kya karta.. usne mujhe harami kaha tha… matlab swayam The Originator ko… isliye ye sab toh use jhelna hee tha… anyway, jab RP ne us ladki ka gala kaat diya toh main peechhe muda aur Sona ke peechhe jakar uski gardan sahlate hue bola…

“Sona… mera lona”

“k..k..kya…”

“chal side me…”

Jiske baad Sona ek jhatke me turant khadi hui.. matlab usne koyi virodh nahi kiya… face ka koyi exression change nahi kiya… shayad use mujhpar first year se hee crush tha… ab main hoon hee itna cute…

maine Sona ko uthaya aur waha se jaane laga, Arun ek side me khada hokar chup-chap ye sab dekh raha tha. shayad thodi der pahle maine use jo kaha tha use usne dil me le liya tha…

“itna chup kyun hai… ja chod Divya ko. Main toh mazak kar raha tha…”

“abey main, bur nahi manta…”

“phhir chup-chap kyun khada hai... isko chodega kya…”Sona ki choot bahar se hee sahlate hue maine kaha…

“nahi.. Divya ko… crush thi meri first year me…”

“toh problem kya hai…”

“problem ye hai ki yadi main use chodunga toh wo us chudai ko enjoy na karne lage… iska mujhe dar hai. isliye main yaha konte me khade hokar is college ka sabse chutiya ladka dhoondh raha hoon… jis-se chudne ke liye ek kutiya bhi mana kar de aur jab wo ladka Divya ko chodega toh Divya ko khud se ghin ho jayegi…”

“all hail Lord Arun… bow… that's my bro... wo raha kallu Kanghi-chor…”

“haan, wo thik rahega…”

“abey Kariya gand…”Kallu ko aawaz dekar maine paas bulaya… aur jab wo paas aa gaya toh maine kaha…

“Sona ko chodega ya Divya ko…”

“kya…”

“madarchod… Sona ko chodega ya Divya ko…”

“Esha ko… par wo dikh nahi rahi…”

Jiske baad main, Arun, Sona… waha mauzood har ek shaks Kallu Kanghichor ki taraf dekhne laga… main toh ye soch ke hairan ho jata hoon ki time to time itni pelayi khakar bhi uski himmat kaise ho jati hai... mere khilaf jaane ki.... Esha ke baare me aisa toh college time me bhi koyi nahi bolta tha aur isne toh yaha bol diya… maine apni aankhe band ki, dono hatho se apni aankhe mali aur phhir uska tetua pakad kar RP se chaku maanga… 

"Isme ye jaldi mar jayega.. fork de. I always wanted to do this..."

Maine apne hath me fork liya... kaliye ko neeche zameen me litakar Arun aur RP ko use pakadne ke liye kaha aur apna kaam shuru kar diya. Is dauran Kallu yadi thoda sa bhi hilta toh fork beasar ho jata.. lekin maine haar nahi mani aur dheere-dheere hee sahi… uski gardan kaat-ta raha.. maine uske gardan ki ek-ek nash ko kaata.. haddi tod di aur finally puri tarah uski gardan kaat kar jab main utha toh mere pure sharir me sar se lekar kamar tak khoon se san chuka tha… maine apna chehra saaf kiya aur Divya ko bhi apne sath aane ke liye kaha….

“tu mujhe maar de, lekin main tujh jaise sanki ke sath kabhi nahi jaungi…”rote hue Divya boli…

“jayegi toh teri maa bhi…”

“kya.. meri maa…”

“Arman bhai.. le ke aaun kya iski maa ko… is Divya gadwi ko isi ki maa ka gand chatwana..."

“ja.. aur jaldi lana… Godspeed”

“thik hai main chalti hoon…”rote hue Divya boli… “lekin meri maa ko kuch mat karna…”

“sorry babe… ab toh tere sath-sath tere bagal me teri maa bhi ghodi banegi…”bolte hue maine Divya aur Sona ka baal pakadkar zameen me ghistate hue waha se le jaane laga….
______________________________

Sona aur Divya ko mere dwara zameen me ghasit-te hee waha hadkanp mach gaya... waha mauzood sabhi ladke jis par bhi mann kiya kood pade… kuch ne iska virodh bhi kiya… par…. Ladkiyo ki choochi-gand dekhkar wo bhi khud ko nahi rok paye.. 

Khair main.... Sona aur Divya ko lekar neeche apne room me jaane laga… maine seedhiyo se utarte waqt bhi dono ko ghasit-ta raha.. jis-se unke sar seedhiyo se takraye... wo dono roti rahi, mujhse bheekh magti rahi ki main unhe chhod du... par unhe chhodne ke bajay main ek aur baar un dono ko seedhiyo se ghasit-te hue upar le gaya aur phhir wapas seedhiyo se neeche laya...
.

Divya aur Sona ko apne room me lakar.. maine dono ko nanga kiya aur bistar par aage Sona ko ghodi banaya aur uske peechhe Divya ko… Divya ko maine Sona ki gand chatne ke liye kaha… jise wo fauran chatne lagi.. us se ban nahi raha tha.. par phhir bhi bina ruke Sona ki gand me jeebh firaye pade thi aur idhar maine, Divya ki gand se apna lund sataya…. Aur ahiste-ahiste andar dalne laga... 

"Aaahhh... maaa"Divya cheeckhi..

"Teri maa bhi yahi chillayegi.. rook thodi der.."

...ki tabhi upar chhat se ajeeb-ajeeb aawaze aane lagi… shayad upar ladayi ho rahi thi. maine khidki se bahar dekha….

“andhera….? Ye kaise hua…”Divya ke gand se apna lund nikal kar maine socha… 

"yaha toh andhera hota hee nahi.."

“andhera ho gaya… yani…”cheekhte hue Divya boli…

“chup be..”

Divya ko ghoomakar maine uska jabda pakda aur uske honth me apna lund ragadte hue bola.. 

"Le choos.."

Par jab Divya ne apna muh nahi khola toh maine uska tetua daba diya... jis-se Divya ka muh khula aur maine uske muh me lund dal diya..

“raat hui matlab Gautam aa gaya…”Sona ekdum se khade hokar boli… “isiliye.. isiliye Esha aaj raat party me nahi thi..”

“toh…”Divya ka gardan dabate hue uske muh me apna lund andar-bahar karke maine kaha “soch toh use kaisa lagega jab use maloo hoga ki maine uski behan ko choda… aur agla number uski maa ka hai…”

“Gautaaaaam….”Sona apna jism dhak-kar jor se cheekhi…

Aur uske cheekhne ke turant baad hee mujhe ek rod dikhayi diya.. jo ki mere seene ko seedhe cheerte hue nikla tha… kuch der ke liye toh main waise hee khada raha jaise kuch hua hee na ho aur jab saans lene ki koshish ki toh Gautam achanak mere saamne aaya aur saamne se bhi ek rod ghusakar paar kar diya… mera dum ghutne laga.. main ye bhool gaya tha ki saans kaise lete hai… maine saans lene ke liye apna muh fada aur tabhi Gautam ne ek aur rod uthaya aur seedhe mere muh me ghused diya...

“jaan pyari hai toh dobara mat dikhna idhar… tujhe thikane lagane ke baad tere ek-ek dost ko niptaunga.. Arun… Saurabh … ek-ek hosteler ki maa chod dunga main aur sabse pahle toh us Rajshri Pandey ki dayi chodunga.... aur ek baat apne gand me bhar le… daring starts with me…”

“and ends with me…. and here i defeated self-claimed 4.0... he wanted to imprison me... but see, i'm getting out of here. Tu college me bhi chutiya tha aur yaha bhi chutiya hee hai.. ja.. jake apni behan ki gand ka khoon saaf kar.. hahaha... see you later, waiter.."maine kaha.. mann me.

Aur ek baar phhir se main mar raha tha.. main wahi farsh par neeche pada raha aur phhir achanak se sab kuch normal ho gaya.. main normally saans lene laga.. normally feel karne laga. Pahle ki tarah normally sar dard bhi shuru hua... Maine apni gardan ghumayi toh dekha ki… mere pure sharir me patti bandha hua tha..

" mummy bana ke rakh diya mujhe in logo ne... kahi 100... 200 saal toh nahi beet gaye..."

maine apna sar wahi aage-peechhe thodi der tak ragdata raha jis-se mujhe aabhas hua ki mere sar ke baal udd chuke the.. aur toh aur main waha akela nahi tha…

“kahi main college ke second year me toh nahi hoon, jaha Gautam ke gundo ne mujhe mara tha… ? yadi aisa ho toh…? Maza hee aa jaye. Kyunki yadi ye sahi hoga toh phhir wo sab galat hoga… Sidar bhai zinda honge aur college ke do saal ab bhi baki honge… maa kasam yadi ye sach hua toh pure mann se padhayi karunga… gand maraye Esha, Gautam, Arun, Saurabh… hostel chhod dunga… daru chhod dunga… duniya chhod dunga... Bas ye sahi ho jaye…”

Confirm karne ke liye maine aas-paas nazar mari… mere sirahne se right side me lagbhag 60 degree angle par ek Buddha apni budhiya ke hath se khana kha raha tha… 

“do hafte se jyada nahi jiyega ye lawda… hath-pair thik ho jaye toh main khud raat me mauka dekh ke marunga is buddhe ko… madarchod, mere saamne khana kha raha hai… marega tu..”

Phhir maine left side me apni gardan ghumayi… jaha 20° par ek aurat aankho me moot liye apne husband ke bagal me uska hath pakad ke baithi hui thi… wo apne husband se kuch bol rahi thi.. par uska husband tha ki kuch sun hee nahi raha tha… kash ki meri bhi biwi hoti… toh mast mutth marwata… is aurat ko iska husband bahut dukh de raha hai… raat me isko bhi salta dunga… 

Phhir meri nazar left side me hee 70 se 80° angle ke beech gayi. Main exact angle nahi bata sakta kyunki ek toh meri bayi aankh se kuch khas dikh nahi raha tha upar se tirchha dekhne se meri bayi aankh me dard bhi hone laga tha.. lekin maine phhir bhi dekha ki shayad mutth marne ka koyi jugad jam jaye… par wo wala bed toh khali tha. isliye main wapas apni aankh ki direction 20° pe set karke bejubaan ki tarah lete aadmi ki aurat ko dekhne laga… maine imagine kiya ki uska husband mar gaya hai aur wo gam me ro rahi hai… phhir main hero ke mafiq use dilasa dene jata hoon aur dilasa dete-dete uska doodh dabakar uske pond me apna lund ragadne lagta hoon… uske husband ki laash wahi mere saamne jis bed par hai usi bed me us aurat ko jhuka kar us aurat ki saree uthakar uski chaddi utar kar chodne lag jata hoon… aaahhhhh. 

“thank god…”mujhe jaga hua dekh jab ek nurse ki nazar mujh par padi toh wo boli… jispar maine apni nazar us aurat se hatakar us nurse ke taraf ki… 

Nurse maal toh nahi thi par phhir bhi maine use dekhkar aankh mar di… jispar wo mujhe ajeeb tarah se muskurate hue dekhne lagi…

“choo…choo…choooooo…choosegi kya…. lawda”maine pura dum lagakar kaha aur phhhir sar itni jor se ghuma ki wapas apni aankh band kar li…
.

Mujhe ummid thi ki ab main wapas Originator wali duniya me jaunga aur Gautam se apna badla lunga.. par sabse aham sawal ye tha ki main abhi hoon kaha aur ye kaun sa saal hai.. yadi main apne college ke second year me hoon toh phhir ye mere liye bahut achhi khabar hai kyunki tab MTL bhai ki maut, Aradhna ka meri zindagi me aana, Golden jubilee me performance na de pana, 8th Semester me meri thukayi hona ye sab mahaj mere dimag ka ittefaq hota… phhir na toh koyi River View colony hoti aur na hee koyi Esha… mera matlab Nisha aur na hee Sonam… ab toh mujhe khud ke astitva pe bhi shaq hone laga tha ki aakhir main hoon bhi ya nahi... aur yadi ye sab… sab mere dimag ka khel hai toh phhir na toh koyi Angelina hogi aur na hee koyi Madhulika…
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“tabhi main sochu ki main school life me kaise cigarette pee raha tha… jabki jo reality mujhe maloom thi uske according toh main school me bahut simple, sober aur sweet type ka banda tha… wo zaroor mere dimag ki upaj hogi… warna kaun aise raat-raat bhar jaagkar national highway me loot-maar karta hai aur kaun jabran Daddu jaiso se bhidta hai… toh ye sab jhooth tha…? I’m sure ki main apne college ke second year me maar khane wale kand ke karan yaha hoon na ki Daddu ki maar ki vazah se… 2.0 ?... 2.0… two dot O ? ye bhi nahi hai… kyunki... 2.0 main hee hoon..? phhir toh pakka main second year me hoon aur ye ICU ka hee scene hai… let me guess… main is samay takla hoon… jo ki us samay bhi tha… damn sure… main college me hee hoon. Bas jaldi se koyi college ka banda mujhse milne aa jaye”

Main jab tak jaag sakta tha.. jagta raha.. kisi ke aane ka intezaar karta raha.. par koyi nahi aaya.. kayi hafto tak koyi nahi aaya ya phhir kayi dino tak… mujhe samay ka koyi andaza nahi tha. isliye mujhe aksar kuch ghante… din ke barabar lagte the aur kuch din hafte ke barabar… mujhe kabhi bhi achanak hosh aata… kabhi normally toh kabhi sar me tez dard ki vazah se. ek baar toh main chillate hue utha… aisa kayi hafto tak chalta raha, ya phhir kayi dino tak.. mujhe thik se kuch pata nahi.. main bas uthta… kuch der utha rahta... kuch der aur uthe rahne ki koshish karta aur phhir so jata. Mujhe bade ajeeb-o-gareeb sapne aate the… jaise ki ek sapne me main sirf isliye mar gaya kyunki mere paas khane ko kuch nahi tha. ek sapne me mujhe zinda kaat diya gaya… aise kayi dil ko dahla dene wale sapne mujhe aaye. Matlab, mera matha khisak gaya tha. Maine ek baar spane me yaha ka sapna dekha.. matlab maine sapne me koyi jagah dekhi... jaha thak-haar kar main so gaya,jiske baad maine sapne me dekha ki main yaha ICU me leta hua sapna dekh raha hoon ki main sapne me sapna dekh raha hoon... mujhe kuchsamajh hee nahi aa raha tha ki kya sach hai aur kya jhooth. Par is dauran jo ek baat… jo ek sawal mere dimag me constant raha wo ye ki main hoon kaha… kya Daddu mere dimag ka vaham tha ya phhir sach… ?

“thik hai.. dusare angle se sochta hoon. Mujhe yaha admit hue hafte toh hue hee honge… phhir mujhe hosh aaye bhi kuch din hue honge, lekin mujhse milne abhi tak koyi nahi aaya… yadi main college time me hota toh zaroor koyi na koyi mujhse milne aata. Chalo, maan liya ki hospital walo ne mere dosto ko mujhse na milne diya ho… lekin mere gharwale…? Unme se koyi kyun nahi aaya. Ye toh tabhi ho sakta hai jab maine apni engineering comlete ki ho aur uske baad apne bade bhai ki shadi me wo kiya ho… jaisa ki main manta hoon ki main kiya hoon. Jiske baad maine apne gharwalo ka aur mere gharwalo ne mera tyag kar diya ho… warna college time me rahta toh koyi na koyi toh zaroor mujhse milne aata. Mera bhai nahi… mere papa nahi toh kam se kam meri maa toh zaroor aati. Lekin koyi nahi aaya yani… yani ye sab sala sach hai… kash ki family show wala kand na kiya hota… toh… anyway...., is angle se toh yahi lag raha hai ki Daddu… Ajmeri… Nisha sab real me hai… kyun , 2.0 ? ye bhi pata nahi kaha mar gaya… ye hospital wale, kuch batate bhi nahi. kam se kam mera laptop toh mujhe de de… ekat tv series hee complete kar du…”

Khair main is sawal se jhoojhta raha aur Dheere-dheere meri situation me sudhar hone laga… mera dahina toh nahi par baya hath kuch thik hua… jiske baad maine left side me 20° angle par lete ek adhed umra ki biwi jab us-se milne aayi toh uska gand dekhkar rook-rook kar mutth mara… rook-rook kar matlab, mera hath thodi-thodi der baad bahut jyada dard dene lagta tha, isliye mujhe beech-beech me rukna pad jata tha… aadha ghanta laga mujhe mutth marne me. 
hospital wale mujhe kuch nahi batate the. wo na toh mujhe ye batate the ki mera bill kaun pay kar raha hai aur na hee ye ki aaj din-taarikh kaun si hai… unke kuch na batane ki ek vazah shayad ye bhi ho sakti hai ki main unse kuch puchhta bhi nahi tha. Mujhe andar se feel hua ki yadi main.. yani ki swayam me Swayam Shri Arman.. in logo se kuch puchhenge toh beizzati ho sakti hai... istarah na maine kuch puchha aur na hee unhone kuch bataya. Maine bhi socha ki... chalne do lawda, jab tak chalta hai... kaun sa yaha se bahar jaane ke baad bahar Angelina mera wait kar rahi hogi...

istarah ICU me pade-pade din gin-ne ke aalawa mere paas aur koyi raasta nahi tha. Beizzati na ho, isliye maine kisi se din, taarikh tak nahi puchha... balki din gin-ne ke lliye maine khane ko target banaya… ek din me wo teen baar mujhe jhat type ka khana dete the aur khane ki counting karke main din gin raha tha aur usi se mujhe andaza hota ki abhi raat hai ya din…
.

“kis-se milna hai…?”

“Arman…”

“aage se right wale room me jayiye…”ek nurse ki aawaz mere kano me padi jiske baad main kafi utsahit ho gaya tha. kyunki mujhe mere kayi sawalo ke jawab mujhe ek sath milne wale the…. Jaise ki main kaha hoon aur kya sach hai... kaun sach hai.
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Maine dua ki.. ki ye mere gharwale ho ya phhir mere college ka koyi mera dost aur jab wo manav mere saamne aaya toh…….

“Madhure and Shriwas…”mujhse milne aaye logo ko dekh kar maine kaha…

“sir bhi laga le…”mere bed ke paas rakhi chair me baith-te hue Madhure bola…

“sab pata chal gaya tere baare me…”muskurate hue Shriwas bola… “yakin nahi hota ki itni purani aur chhoti si baat par tu Daddu se bhid jayega…”

“Daddu ka game hua….”

“nahi… zinda hai wo…”

“wahi… mera bhi wahi matlab tha… hai kaha wo…”

“jail me… thanks to you…”

“no problem…”

“nahi yar… sach me thanks. Tune jisliye bhi ye kiya ho, hume us-se matlab nahi… par teri vazah se kayiyo ki zindagi sudhar gayi… kayi ladkiya apne ghar chali gayi aur kayi bade-bade name saamne aaye… ab unme se adhiktar jail me hai ya phhir farari kat rahe hai…”

“mera bill kaun bhar raha hai… yad rakhna mere paas footi kaudi nahi hai. isliye yaha ka bill bharwa dena, warna yaha ka bill bharne ke liye mujhe NH-6 me phhir se chori karni padegi…”

“Bairangi ji yaha ka bill de rahe hai…”

“thik hai… tu aaram kar… hum log toh aise hee aa gaye the…”apni jagah par khade hote hue Shriwas ne kaha…

“yar Shriwas, suna hai ki hospital ki chay bahut badhiya hoti hai… ho jaye kya ek-ek cup…”

“chalo… chay peene me kono burayi thodi hai...”
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Shriwas aur Madhure ke jaane ke ek hafte baad tak main ICU me raha jiske baad mujhe general ward me shift kar diya gaya… general ward me aane ke baad maine doctor se, nurses se kaha ki main ab thik hoon, mujhe discharge kar do… lekin wo lawde nahi mane. Phhir maine unhe kaha ki main swayam ek doctor hoon.. par. wo lavde phhir nahi mane. Jiske baad maine unhe 8th Semester ki story sunayi aur kaha ki main hee Arman hoon aur mujhe apna badla lena hai... lekin wo lawde phhir bhi nahi mane aur bole ki yadi maine ab unhe pareshan kiya toh mujhe electric shock denge...

Is dauran ek-do baar aur Madhure+Shriwas mujhse milne aaye... maine unhe bhi kaha ki mujhe yaha se nikalna hai, mere fans bahar mera intezaar kar rahe hai... lekin wo dono lawde bhi nahi mane... Jiske baad ek din main bathroom jaane ke bahane hospital se bhag khada hua… par ye meri galti thi. maine socha tha ki main ab bhi pahle jaisa fit-fat hounga aur kood-kad ke yaha se khisak lunga... lekin main bhagte hue hospital ke main gate tak pahuchte-pahuchte do baar gira… shuru me third floor par, jab do guards mere peechhe daude, lekin phhir bhi main kaise bhi karke neeche tak yani ground floor tak pahucha par seedhi ke paas mere waha pahuchne se pahle hee 4-5 guards khade the. jiske karan maine waha se neeche parking me jaane wali seedhi par direct koodne ka socha. Mujhe maloom tha ki aisa karna sahi nahi hoga aur isiliye main ye karne ke liye aur jyada motivate hua… kyunki jo chiz mujhe nahi karni chahiye… wahi karne ki mujhe chuluk rahti hai. Toh waha jab main third floor se seedhiyo ke raaste stick ke sahare dheere-dheere langdate hue, girte-padte bhagte hue jab ground floor par bas pahuchne hee wala tha ki mujhe waha mera intezaar karte hue 4-5 guard dikhe… jiske baad maine ground floor se neeche parking me jaane wali seedhiyo ko dekha aur guards ko dekhkar haste hue jaha tha wahi baith gaya…....... kya laga, koodunga ?  aur jab meri is harqat par hospital ke guards ki nazar gayi toh unhone mujhe turant daudkar pakada aur wapas general ward me lejakar fek diya…
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“aisa kaun karta hai… aayye… kya samajhta hai khud ko. Management ne tere karan mere ko chamkaya… Punha kidhihi nahi.. anyatha mee tumhala thappada karin..”

“jaiiii Maharashtraaa…” General ward me chillakar maine kaha… jiske baad Mujhe laga ki wo moti-bhaisi nurse jai Maharashtra sunkar khushi se wo bhi Jai Maharashtra chillayegi… lekin wo nahi chillayi… aur main hasne laga...

“TV me toh aise hee dekha tha… 2-3 baar”

“why are you smiling… seems happy…”ek aur moti-tagdi nurse jo baju wale patient ko dekh rahi thi mujhse boli...

“happy...? no… If I'm silent then I’m happy but if I’m smiling or laughing , I’m depressed, full of anger and want to fuck someone. IN SHORT- My smile is more dangerous than my silence... So, Why don't you go outside and take a flying fuck at a rolling donut.... buffalo…”
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Maine kaha aur phhir chup ho gaya...Ye maine jaan-buchkar nahi kaha tha, matlab main uske sharir par koyi comment nahi karna chahta tha… wo toh……. okay, ye maine jaan-buch kar hee kaha tha aur sach kahu toh ye kahne ke baad mujhe bahut maza bhi aaya aur jor-jor se main hasa bhi, jiske baad waha general ward me mauzood aur bhi log hasne lage jiske bad wo moti bhains waha se chali gayi… wo bhi bina kuch kahe. Iske baad wo jab-jab round par humare ward me aati, main use dekh kar hasna chalu kar deta tha aur mujhe hasta dekh kuch aur log bhi hasna shuru kar dete…. Shuru ke kuch din toh wo moti sah gayi par phhir ekdin usne khunnas me meri shikayat kar di… jiske baad ek doctor us nurse ko lekar mere saamne aaya…

“kya name hai tumhara…”us doctor ne mujhse puchha…

“nahi bataunga…......... hahahahaha”

“no problem…”meri medical report wali file dekhte hue doctor ne kaha… jiske front page me hee maine pen se choot banaya hua tha…. kul milakar kahu toh jabse mujhe general ward me shift kiya gaya tha, main aisi ut-patang harqate karte hee rahta tha… Doctor mere report file me choot dekh kar kuch nahi bola... bas khunnas me, gusse se medical report ka wo page fadkar dustbin me fek diya

Main yaha se jald se jald nikalna chahta tha aur ye sab maine isiliye kar raha tha… main isme kamyab toh nahi hua par mere general ward me shift hone ke 12 din baad aakhir wo din aa hee gaya jjab hospital walo ne mujhe discharge kiya….
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“har hafte ye teen injection lagwa lena warna infection phail jayega… medicine time pe lena aur apna khayal rakhna…. Ab shayad tum pahle ki tarah ghoom-phhir na pao… par maine is-se bhi bure halat dekhe hai… tumhe toh khush hona chahiye ki tumhari halat kuch sahi hai… face bhi tumhara kharab ho chuka hai, yadi surgery karani ho toh… inke paas contact kar sakte ho…”kisi surgeon ka card dete hue us doctor ne mujhse kaha… “aur is galatfehmi me kabhi mat rahna ki hospital walo ko tumne bahut pareshan kiya… Bairangi ji ke karan tumhe humne tolerate kiya, warna 2 seconds me main tumhari zindagi ke sabse bure pal tumhe de sakta tha…”

“chup be… mujhe mat bata ki mujhe kya karna hai. ek toh itne din se bore kar raha hai.. upar se aaj jab jaa raha hoon tab bhi boring instruction de raha hai… main amaratva ko prapt kar chuka hu.. isliye apni ye doctor-giri kisi aur ko dikhana warna ek mukka chhati me markar puri haddi-pasli tod dunga… zameen me letaakar aisa kachrunga na ki… ”

“get out…”

“hat lawda… jhat jaisi shakl lekar mere shakl ke baare me baat kar raha hai ki main surgery kara loon… abey gandmare, mujhe dekh aur khud ko dekh... kaha main Kudrat ka karishma aur kaha tu Kudrat ka shraap... tujhse achchha toh mera lund dikhta hai…. aur bc kya gyan chod raha tha ki…. Ye toh kuch bhi nahi hai, maine is-se bhi bure halat dekhe hai…. abey, jhat… ab tum mujhe chodna sikhaoge….”

“bhag ja harami…. Nahi toh…”table par rakhi ek syringe uthakar wo doctor gusse se kanpte hue chillaya...

“tu toh. bur maan gaya be… hat lawda, sachcha engineer nahi hai tu… waise, teri biwi maal hai kya… dilana ek baar… ye le... phhir se bur maan gaya tu toh.. burmari ke"

Jiske baad mujhe do security guards ne waha se uthaya aur hospital ke main gate ke bahar fek diya(literally) aur sath me ek polythene me medicine aur ek file jisme mere liye descriptions.. prescriptions.. ascriptions.... likhe the… use bhi fek diya. maine apne dimag me time reset kiya aur timer on karke ek taraf se walking stick aur dusari taraf se hospital boundary ki deewar ka sahara lekar khada hone ki koshish karne laga aur jab mujhe 10 minute aise ho gaye toh mujhe khayal aaya ki doctor sahi bol raha tha… deewar ka sahare khade hokar maine lambi saans bhari aur neeche pade medicine aur meri medical reort wali file ko dekha… 

“Shri Arman doesn’t need anyone or anything….…”medicine aur medical report wahi chhodkar main walking stick aur deewar ko pakad kar aage badhne laga… 

“oye auto… rook… peechhe aa… abey aana… waha tak paidal aane me aadha ghanta lag jayega mujhe..”

“Railway jaoge... Railway... Railway... Railway.. aa jao bhaiya, railway wale...”auto rok kar auto wala chillane laga.. maine use dekha wo meri hee umra ka tha ya phhir mujhse bhi chhota. Jab main use jawab dene ki bajay use dekhta raha toh usne mujhse phhir se puchha…

“Railway bhaiya…?”

“ nahi.. Railway station toh kharid liya kal.. aaj soch raha hoon RVC kharid loon... … par pahle ye le… lund pakad mera…” walking stick fek kar use dete hue maine kaha... "ab andar kheech mujhe"

“thanks... lund wapis kar mera..." andar aakar hafte hue maine kaha

“kaha jaoge…”

“Bairangi…”

“kaun bairangi… Bairangi bol toh aise rahe ho, jaise Siddhart Singh Bairangi ho…”
Auto wale ki baat sunkar main mann hee mann muskuray aur Bairangi ke yaha jana cancel karke use seedhe River View Colony chalne ke liye kaha… aaj itne dino baad wapas River View Colony jakar mujhe thoda ajeeb lag raha tha… mujhe aisa feel ho raha tha jaise main aaj pahli baar RVC ja raha hoon.. matlab same depressed.. low .. down and out wali feelings jo yaha first time aate waqt maine feel kiya tha. waise abki baar kafi kuch badal chuka tha. jiska sahi-shot andanaza mujhe tab laga jab maine khud ko closet ke mirror me pura dekha. 

Aur jaise hee khud ko usme dekha yakin hee nahi hua ki ye main hoon… matlab mujhe apne chehre, apni body, apni personality ka hee toh sabse jyada ghamand tha. par ab… aisa lag raha tha, jaise maine aaj tak jitney logo ko badsurat bolke mazak udaya hai… ye sab usi ka nateeza hai. maine apne sar par hath ferte hue khud ko dekha… mera sar ka aadhe se adhik hisse me baal nahi the, matlab baal nahi aa rahe the... jo ki Daddu ke maar ki nishani ban chuki thi... aur waha ab kabhi baal aayenge bhi nahi... mere right side wala gaal tab buri tarah fata hoga, jab Daddu ne mujhe buri tarah mara tha… jiske baad waha taanke lage aur ab taanko ne apna nishan chhod diya tha.. ek aur chiz jo maine notice ki thi... wo ye ki jyada tez light hone par meri dahini aankh se dikhna band ho jata hai... kul milakar mera baya hath... dahina pair... dahini taraf wali aankh... khatm ho chuki thi. Upar se ab zindagi bhar mujhe ganja bankar rahna tha.

"MAHTARICHOD..." apne hath me pakde stick se closet ka aaina todkar, main wahi neeche zameen par baith gaya… 
.

"Doctor ke according ab main zindagi bhar sirf stick ki sahayata se hee chal paunga. Yani ki ab main zindagi me kabhi basketball nahi khel sakta..... NH-6 me dhamal nahi macha sakta … mujhe waise toh khud par kabhi taras nahi aata, par aaj mujhe khud par bahut jyada taras aa raha tha...."

“ye maine kya kar diya…”neeche toot-kar bikhre aaine ke tukde me ek aur bar khud ko dekh kar maine kaha…

“is-se achchha toh mar jata…”

“kaun…?”

“abey main…”

“2.0… ?”

“yeah…. really, is-se buri shakl maine zindagi me kabhi nahi dekhi…”

“maine bhi… tu tha kaha”

“ main har pal tere sath tha. ICU me, General ward me, phhir auto me bhi… bas teri badsurat shakl dekh kar tujhse baat karne ka mann nahi kar raha tha…”

“isiliye maine hospital me aaina nahi dekha, ye sochkar ki jab discharge ho jaunga toh pahle ki tarah thik ho jaunga…”

“ab koyi chance nahi… tujhe, tune kitni bar samjhaya ki sudhar ja… par tu toh The Biggest, The Greatest, The Deepest ki rat lagaye baitha tha… badla kabhi bhi free-fokat me nahi aata dost… bhari keemat chukani padti hai. example ke taur par tu khud ko le le”

"There is no use crying over spilt milk“ 

“ab kya karega…”

“ab bacha hee kya zindagi me… isliye,baki bacha badla lunga… ab Esha aur Gautam ka number… par uske pahle Nisha...”

Chapter-36: Agony and Angelina

“abhi bhi nahi manega…”

“you know my answer, dont you...”

“kisi ko call karu.. Nisha ko ya Varun ko…?”

“ Arman doesn’t need anyone or anything… now, i'm going to get some shut-eye… see you tomorrow morning”stick zameen me tika-kar uske sahare khade hote hue maine kaha aur bed ki taraf dekha...

Par bed toh waha tha hee nahi, uski jagah toh waha sirf raakh thi, jiske baad mujhe dhyan aaya ki maine thandi lagne par aag ke liye bed ko part by part jalaya tha. isliye main sofe me baitha aur band khidki ki taraf dekha… main khidki ke bahar dekhna chahta tha… par itni himmat nahi thi ki chalkar utni door jaun aur khidki khol kar wapas yaha baithkar bahar ka nazara dekhu… isliye maine imagine kar liya ki khidki khuli hui hai aur bahar mast suraj ki roshani khidki ke through mere room me mujh tak aa rahi hai… maine imagine kiya ki mere room ki light maine band kar di hai aur pure kamre me andhera hai. suraj ki kuch kirne khidki ke through mere room me aa rahi thi… maine apni gardan peechhe sofe par tikaya aur so gaya…..
..
..

“Arman bhai…”

“arey hatt madarchod..”

“arey Arman bhai main hoon… Rajshri..”

“chal bhag... subah 7 baje soya hoon.. waise bhi kuch mahino baad 8th semester khatm hone ke baad zindagi jhand ho jayegi… neend nahi aayegi, isiliye abhi neend ka quota pura kar raha hoon…”

“arey Esha mam se related hai..”

“ main toh mazak kar raha tha… mera sense of humour toh tu jaanta hee hai...” uthkar baithte hue maine kaha aur chadar lapet kar baith-te hue bola “bol de ki usne.. I love you bola hai…”

“nahi bola…”

“phhir..”

“uski ek friend hai.. usi ki class me padhti hai. main us-se kab se line de raha tha… phhir usne bhi mujhe thoda-bahut line diya matlab ki hum dono love conductor the, insulator koyi nahi tha aur barabar ek-dusare ko line de rahe the… lekin usne hostel ke hee second year ke launde ko propose kar diya do din pahle… tab se bahut kharab lag raha hai… matlab kaise iska vivaran doon, samajh nahi aa raha… ek baar phhir se wahi sab kuch ho raha hai... phhir se ladki mujhe dhokha de gayi aur jab maine ye baat apne class ke dosto ko bataya aur unse help mangi toh wo bhi mujhpar hasne lage… do din se mera mazak uda rahe hai.. aap anchoring ki practice me aaj kal busy ho toh aapko bola nahi.. par sach me Arman bhai… life bahut viran lag rahi hai. bhookh-pyas-neend-chain-vain sab udd gaya hai..”

“isme Esha se related kya hai…”

“hai na… mera do din se ye haal hai. aap toh char saal se Esha ko Gautam ke sath dekh rahe ho… kaise jhela aapne… toh ab hua na Esha se related..”

“mujhse doglapan mat kiya kar. Madad chahiye toh seedhe aao.. mere saamne gidgidao... main madad kar dunga.. time kya hua hai…”

“11 baj rahe hai…”

“chal.. phhir. Arun uth…”

“na toh main mahila pradhan movie dekhta hoon aur na hee mahilao se koyi sambandh rakhta hoon aur na hee unse sambandh rakhne wale tum jaise burchatto se… ”

“wo konte me pada danda utha…”jeans pahante hue maine kaha aur phhir aaine me dekhkar Rajshri se puchha “bata, RP .. is college ka sabse handsome launda kaun hai…”

“aap Arman bhai… aapko toh modeling-vodeling karna chahiye… kaha Engineering kar rahe ho…”

“bata.. phhir bhi Esha nahi pat rahi.. itna mast dikhta hoon main, kabhi-kabhi toh lagta hai ki khud ko Mr. Engineer ki upadhi de doon..”

“pat jayegi, Arman bhai… aap na dhang se line nahi marte…”

“nahi pategi…”karwat lete hue Arun bola

“cowards choose leave while stalwarts choose live… tu chal RP”

maine hostel warden ke room me rakha lohe ka rod uthaya aur hostel se bahar aakar hostel ke board ki taraf dekha… jaha hostel board ke upar yani neeche ek line likhi hui thi...

“jo akadta hai, wo pakadta hai- Arman”

Maine cigarette sulgayi aur RP ne Rajshri ka pouch fada aur hum dono college ki taraf badh gaye… 

“maine uske liye khud ko kitna badal diya tha, Arman bhai… ek hafte se Rajshri bhi nahi kha raha tha… par kya fayda hua… pat wo junior se gayi aur maine jab us-se puchha toh mujhe dehati, gutkha-khor, loser aur na jaane kya-kya bolne lagi… kya maine galat kiya, Arman bhai… khud ko badalkar”

“ launda hai kaun se branch ka…”

“Mech. mechanical…”thoda hichkichate hue RP bola…

“wah… ek toh hosteler, upar se khud meri branch ka… fresher party me daru pilaya hounga main usko aur tere karan aaj…. Khair, kaun sa mera koyi imaan, dharam hai. confirm Mechanical ka hai..? kyunki hod chodega mujhe baad me yadi us launde ne shikayat karwa di toh…”

“areyy hod kya kar lega… director hai na”

“Sidar uncle aaj upar se dekh ke kitne gussa ho rahe honge ki kaise humlog unke marne ke baad unka naam ka… unke achchhayi ka misuse kar rahe hai…”

“Sidar bhai toh napunshak type the Arman bhai… aap chaho toh kya nahi kar sakte. Maine aapka presence of mind kayi baar dekha hai… aap jitni jaldi situation ko samajh kar uska solution nikalte ho wo koyi aur nahi kar sakta…”

“bas kar be… aur kitna chadhayega.”

“arey sach… main bhi aapke jaane ke baad aapki mafiq college me dhoom-dhadaka karunga… kuch toh abhi se hee bolne lage hai ki main is college ka next Arman hoon… main bhi ek din aapki tarah banunga…”

“it takes too much sacrifices to become AR-Man, you simply and specially cant be.…”canteen me ghuste hue maine kaha aur RP ko wahi canteen ke gate par khade rahne ke liye kaha…

mujhe waha rod ke sath andar ghusta dekh sab ghabra gaye aur canteen se bahar hadbada kar bhaagne lage... sabki fati me aa gayi thi…………………………… well, aisi meri soch thi ki aisa hoga, par hua nahi. koyi ek bhi apni jagah se nahi hila. Even kisi ne notice tak nahi kiya. Isliye maine pure canteen me nazar mari aur jo pahla banda mujhe Mechanical second year ka dikha seedhe usi ke paas gaya…

“kyun be… class bunk kyun kiya. Khud ko Shri Arman samajhta hai kya…”

“good morning sir..”

“ayushman bhava…”

“wo sir, aaj mess wale ne upma banaya tha breakfast me… isliye yaha charne aaya hu”

kya gunda banoge, lawda aise me… khair tu Rajshri Pandey ki item ke aashiq ko jaanta hai ? hosteler hee hai koyi…”

“kaun… Ranjan…”

“kaha hai…”

“wo kinare baitha hai… aapko hee dekh raha hai..”ek oor ungali dikhate hue usne ishara kiya…

“kaha… wo…”

“haan…”

“thanks…”

Canteen ki Tables me rod thok-thok kar bajate hue main us ladke ki taraf badha… aur jaise hee main uski taraf jaane laga, wo ekdum se utha aur canteen se bahar ki taraf bhaga… lekin gate paas RP khada tha aur usne usko daboch liya…. RP use full marne ke jugad me tha, lekin maine RP ko roka aur us ladke ko parking me laya…

“aap hee ne kaha tha sir… ki hostel wala hostel wale ko nahi marega… humari ladayi Gautam aur uske dosto se hai…”

“I’m the man of my word…”

“toh main jaun…”

“rook toh… main tujhe nahi mar sakta lekin Rajshri Pandey toh mar sakta hai…”

“I’m not the man ooof…. Aage kya tha, Arman bhai…”

“tu maar na… dialogue pe kyu dhyan de raha hai..”

“haan…”bolkar Rajshri Pandey ne us ladke ke gardan apni kohni me fasaya aur uska gardan dabana laga… 

“maaaadharchod.. mere saamne meri maal ko leke ghumega, uske sath valentine week manayega, use movie dikhane le jayega, us-se chat karega, uski pic like karega.. use pizza khilayega.. use apne dost ke room me lejakar uska bur chatega…. Uska pond dabayega.. uske muh me mutth marega... Bhosdike… le…”gardan daboch kar apne ghutne se us ladke ke pond me ek laat marte hue Rajshri Pandey ne kaha…

“tuuujhse nahi pati toh main kya karu, sale shakl dekhi hai apni… din-bhar toh gutkha khake idhar-udhar thookte rahta hai. shakl dekh ke baat kiya kar…”

“maadharchod… Rajshri is life aur apne senior se aise baat karta hai... sale bol toh aise raha hai, jaise Arman bhai jitna handsome dikhta ho"ek aur baar ghutne se uske pond me markar RP bola aur Parking me khadi bike par us ladke ko jhuka kar, uske peeth me back to back mukka marne laga……. 

Maine socha ki RP ab rukega… ab rukega, lekin uske andar itni khunnas thi ki wo mukke pe mukka mare ja raha tha… wo haaf bhi raha tha aur maar bhi raha tha.. uske muh se Rajshri tapak kar us launde ke upar bhi gir raha tha…. Par RP nahi ruka… is dauran waha aur bhi log aaye…

“ho gaya bas kar….”RP ko alag karte hue maine kaha “energy bacha kar rakh… jab iski item aayegi toh uske saamne marna ise... HOD gand toh fad dega meri… par chalta hai… internal me lawda dega… mujhe bhi aur tujhe bhi… manzoor hai…?”

“na… nahi… ek toh waise bhi 5.9 chal raha hai mera……”

“mc jab gand me dum nahi rahta toh aaya mat karo. Chodu hoon kya main, lawda.. chal peechhe ja… mera 7.5 + chal raha hai”

“Riya aa rahi hai…”peechhe jate hue Rajshri bola

“Riya kaun”

“arey wahi… meri maal…”

“ok… plan 2”maine Ranjan ka baal pakda aur Parking me uska baal pakad kar hee khada raha… “hath neeche… kar”

Aur phhir uske gaal me uske maal ke saamne ek jhapad mara… parking me mahol garam hone laga tha, kayi launde waha ghera banane lage the… launda hosteler tha isliye koyi jyada kuch kar nahi sakta tha… mere kuch chuninda sathi College gate ke paas chale gaye the, taki koyi college me jakar kisi ko bata na sake…. Maine ye sab mazak me shuru kiya tha, socha tha… ki aisi hee warning dekar chhod dunga, lekin jaise-jaise bheed badhi… main serious hota gaya…. Matlab ab meri izzat daav pe thi ki Arman apne opposition ko kitna aur kaise dominate karta hai... is tarah ab ye matter mera na hote hue bhi mera ban gaya tha.. 

“Ranjan….”uski maal Parking ke bahar se hee apne boyfriend ko dekh kar daudte hue chillayii...

“Ranjan and Riya… just like Arman and Angelina… hath neeche…”

“I’m sorry… sir…”jab maine use uski item ke saamne ek aur jhapad mara toh wo bola…

“sorry kisliye…? Galti teri thodi hai… galti toh meri hai. mujhe aisa nahi karna chahiye… koyi aur hota toh use apne is kaam ka anjaam bhugatna padta… lekin main Arman hoon… hath neeche…”

Maine ab tak Riya ki taraf achchhe se nahi dekha tha, mera pura concentration Ranjan ko marne me laga hua tha…. kayi baar Ranjan ka gaal laal karke maine use chhoda toh dekha ki… ki… waha Riya ke paas Esha aur Divya bhi khadi thi… bc.. ye dono kab aayi.. khair, maine wapas Ranjan ka baal pakda aur us-se puchha…

“bata be… main jyada handsome hoon ya Gautam… .”

“aap…”

“chal bhag hostel aur jate hee Riya ko block marna… fb me, whatsapp me, dil me… har jagah… ”

Uske baad main un teeno ki taraf badha… mujhe apni taraf aata dekh Esha waha se chali gayi, lekin Riya aur Divya wahi khadi rahi…. Main is samay khud par kafi proud feel kar raha tha…

“jab tum mera kuch ukhad nahi sakte toh mujhse nafrat karne ka kya fayda…”Riya aur Divya ke paas jakar main bola..
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....

Tabhi doorbell ke bajne ke karan meri aankh khuli… news paper main leta nahi aur doodh main peeta nahi, phhir itti subah kaun aa gaya… khidki kholkar maine kaha. 

“subah ho gayi… ? chalo, in sabka ek toh fayda hua ki ab neend badhiya aati hai… "

“Arman…”

“koyi ladki aawaz mar reli hai..”

"Ladki...? VR ?"

Gate me koyi ladki hai, ye khayal aate hee maine stick uthaya aur goggle lagakar gate ki taraf badha… phhir mujhe khayal aaya ki kahi mere hath me stick aur kala chashma dekh kar mujhe andha na samajh le, isliye maine goggle utar diya…
maine gate khola… gate ke saamne do log the… ek nar aur ek maada… aur dono ko main jaanta tha. 

“Arrrrman….”mujhe dekhte hee Nisha boli aur bolne ke baad chup ho gayi…

“it’s A-r-m-a-n..”

Jis par wo thoda sa muskurayi… actually, wo dono muskuraye…

“ tum dono chup-chap bina koyi sympathy-giri kiye yaha se nikal lo aur Varun, main ab bhi tujhse jyada handsome dikhta hoon aur ye sar pe kya baandha hai..? aur tu takla kyun hua … Sonam mar gayi kya ？. Ab har kisi se chodayegi toh yahi hoga .... kisi ne muh me aisa lawda diya hoga ki saans nahi le payi hogi”

“dekha Nisha, maine kaha tha na aur ek tum thi.. jo bol rahi thi ki… itna time ho gaya hai toh Arman badal gaya hoga...”

‘‘time changes everyone except Shri Arman… I am independent of time and space... mujhe yaad hai, tu ek baar Sonam ke kahne pe jhadu mar raha tha. mere bhi room me maar de yar.. purane dino ki khatir... itna toh kar hee sakta hai…”
Jiske baad Varun waha se jaane laga.. tabhi mujhe achanak yaad aaya 

“Sonam ko bolna ki............ uski maa ka bhosda…”

Khisiya kar Varun toh waha se chala gaya lekin Nisha wahi khadi rahi. 

“tu kya blowjob deke jayegi.. tu bhi nikal.. but wait, tu Varun ke sath kyun aayi ? tu Gautam ke sath soti hai na.. I mean, David ke sath. Phhir Varun ke sath kaise…? Kahi tera Varun ke sath affair toh nahi chal raha… mujhe shuru se tere character par shaq tha… zaroor tu, Sonam aur Varun threesome karte hoge… tabhi... tabhiii.. main sochu ki tu mujhse achanak ladne kyu lagi thi....”

“jab tum hospital me admit the, tab main tumhe dekhne aayi thi… par tum kisi nurse se lad rahe the, use abuse kar rahe the.. kafi hasi aayi tumhe hospital me waisa dekh… Varun dikhata nahi, par wo kayi din hospital aaya tha, tumhe dekhne… par tumse mila nahi.”

“toh… kya ukhad liya usne, aisa karke.. hahaha”

“toh ab bhi waqt hai… maine Varun jaisa dost nahi dekha.”

“tumne abhi mujhe nahi dekha… tum mere baare me siway mere lund ke kuch nahi jaanti...”

“ok… bye… and I'm married to David…”

“I don’t… care. I’ll always see you as my slut…"

Nisha ke jaane ke baad main peechhe muda par main peechhe nahi mud paya kyunki peechhe mudte hee maine khud ko us chair me baitha hua paya.. jaha main kal raat soya hua tha... 

"Wasn't i talking to Nisha ? If yeees.., then why am i still on my couch.. and if No, then...... fuck you, man... "
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Main thodi der aur waise hee sofe par raha aur phhir taiyar hone laga...

“iski maa ka... itni dhoop....” room ke bahar kadam rakhte hee maine kaha aur wapas andar aaya...

"ek aankh se toh abhi se hee dikhna band ho gaya..."goggle lagakar wapas bahar kadam rakhte hue maine kaha "i hate everything.. including sun."

.

“so, what’s next…”

“Shriwas texted me, last night and i believe, Bairangi should have my autographs… so, the next stop is Bairangi House..."

Is tarah khadi dopahari me main chashma-vashma mar ke... taiyar-vaiyar hoke Bairangi ke ghar ke liye nikla... . Ganga-jamuna ke kand ke baad kayi chize badal gayi thi... ab main daud nahi sakta tha yaha tak ki dhang se chal bhi nahi sakta tha... mujhe apne room se yani RVC se highway tak pahuchne me hee bc aadha ghanta lag gaya... maine deewar ke sahare teji se chalne ka bhi prayas kiya lekin phhir bhi meri speed me kuch khas parivartan nahi hua aur aadhe ghante me main highway par pahucha aur wahi highway ke kinare lage ek thele wale ke paas rakhi chair me hafte hue baith gaya...

"Do cigarette do... khamkha Daddu ke chakkar me fasa... sale ne mujhe apahij bana diya.. shakl ki maiyya chod di alag... ab jeene ka kya fayda. 5th dimension wale se koyi deal karke main bhi chalta hoon is duniya se... oye auto...rook... rook be..."

"Kaha ja rahe ho..."auto ke rukne par maine puchha...

"Railway...."

"Muh me le lo yar mera..."

Jiske baad auto wale ne mujhe upar se lekar neeche tak dekha aur chup chap waha se chala gaya.... 

"Ye toh lada hee nahi... koyi baat nahi... next wale pe try karta hoon... autoooo..."main jor se chillaya "kaha ja rahe ho..."

"New bus stand..."

"Le lo yar muh me mera...."

Iske baad wo dusara auto wala bhi mujhe ghoorne laga aur uske sath me us auto me baithe log bhi...

"Aaja lad le... lad le be... mera din ban jayega... hat bc... darpok... kariya gand nahi toh... oye auto rook..."

Maine teesare auto wale ko rukwaya... wo udhar hee ja raha tha.. jidhar bairangi ka ghar tha... isliye use bina muh me diye, Main chup chap us auto me baith gaya...
.

"Baithiye... Sarkar aapse kabse milna chah rahe the..."Bairangi ke naukar ne mujhse kaha... 

Mujhe bairangi ke naukar aaj bhi wahi bithaya jaha aakhiri baar Shriwas aur Madhure ke sath bithaya tha. Aur us din ki tarah mujhse aaj bhi puchha ki mujhe kya chahiye... jiske baad maine bhi us din ki tarah aaj bhi use daru ke liye bola aur us din ki tarah aaj bhi uska reaction mujhe kha jaane wala tha... khair... us din ki tarah usne mujhe aaj bhi kuch nahi kaha aur waha aur chala gaya... jiske baad wo Bairangi ki wheelchair dhakelte hue thik usi tarah room ke andar laya jaise us din laya tha... Bairangi ne aaj bhi wahi kapde pahne the jo usne us din pahne hue the. Matlab sabkuch itna similar tha ki... mere dimag me collision hone laga... mera dimag guch-puch hone laga.. mujhe aisa laga jaise koyi mera dimag nichod raha hoon... matlab mujhe puri marne wali feelings aane lagi. Maine apni aankhe band ki aur us din ki tarah aaj bhi sofe me peechhe apna sar tikaya... jiske baad us din ki tarah aaj bhi mere dimag me ek picture ghoomi… jisme kisi jagah, jaha kafi andhera tha… waha koyi ladki lahu-luhan padi thi… uska chehra mujhe bilkul bhi nahi dikh raha tha par aawaz jani-pahchani thi aur jab maine us ladki ko dekha toh usne ektak mera name liya….

“please mujhe mat maro… tum jo bologe main karungi…”
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"Fuck.. Ye bhi us din dekha tha... ye ho kya raha hai... "

"Mujhe tumhare baare me pata chala..."Bairangi bola..

"Aapne vaada kiya tha ki yadi main aur Daddu dono zinda bach gaye toh main us se paanch minute jail me mil sakta hoon... mere khayal se aapne mujhe isi liye yaha bulaya hai.."apne sar ke bal nochte hue maine kaha.. jiske baad mujhe andaza hua ki mere sar par toh baal hai hee nahi... isliye phhir maine imagine kiya ki mere sar par baal hai aur phhir main unhe nochne laga..

"Jaroor.. kyu nahi. Par maine tumhe yaha... tumhara shukriya ada karne ke liye bulaya hai..."

"Cheers... i mean.. that's ok.. no problem..."

"Hmmmm...."apne naukar ko ishara karke Bairangi ne kuch ishara kiya aur mujhe apne sath chalne ke liye kaha...

"Waise aapko bhi thank you... afterall aapne hospital ka pura kharcha jo uthaya.. ."

"I owed it to you....."

"Daddu ko fasaya kaise..."Bairangi ke bagal me stick ke sahare dheere-dheere chalte hue maine kaha...

"Daddu ke paas mile notes ke number... NH-6 me ambulance se chori hue notes ke number se match ho gaye... jis se NH-6 me pichhale kuch mahino se hone wali loot ka pura blame uspar gaya... phhir jungle me jab police uske aadmiyo ka peechha kar rahi thi toh police par bomb ke sath attack karna... Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki ladkiyo ke bayan aur katta smuggling ke case se use aatankwadi ghosit karne me jyada dikkat nahi hui... upar se tumne jo uska signature... ek paper ko modkar liya tha. Wo bhi bahut kaam aaya..."bolte hue Bairangi ek room ke bahar ruka aur meri taraf mudkar mujhe andar dekhne ke liye kaha...
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"Ye meri patni hai.. jo mere bete ki hatya ke baad se aisi hai... "

"Aisi hai..? Matlab kaisi hai..."andar jhakte hue maine mann me kaha"Chhee lawda.. kitna bekar dikh rahi hai... jhatahi.. ise dekh kar toh mera lund bhi ulti kar dega.. mar kyu nahi jati be raand.. ."

"Jab se mere beta gaya hai tab se... se..... iska ilaaj chalu hai..."

"Rona mat re... madarchod..."maine phhir ek baar mann me kaha aur bahar security observe karne laga ki yadi by chance mujhe Bairangi ko jaan se marna pade toh mujhe kya-kya karna padega...

" unke doctor hai... Dr. Boaz aur Dr......."

"Forgive me, for my...... insensitivity...sir but i'm not interested.."

"I was hoping for some........... but never mind, i'll do it alone..."

" chaprasi samajh rakha tha kya. Main phhir dayi bhi chodta hoon..."Bairangi ko dekhkar muskurate hue maine socha...
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Jiske baad Sidharth Bairangi ne mujhse aur koyi baat nahi ki aur thodi der me mujhe apne do aadmiyo ke sath waha se bhej diya... main un dono ke peechhe peechhe chalne laga. Ab wo thahre hatte-katte.. ekdum fit-fat aadmi. Unhone mujhe ek taraf ishara karke apne peechhe aane ke liye kahkar teji se us taraf chal diye aur Main dheere-dheere unke peechhe chalne laga... aur chand minute me hee main unse kafi pichhad gaya...

"Sale log.. mann me bahut has rahe honge... mujhpar. Ab toh katta bhi nahi hai mere paas ki raaste me uda doon, bhosdiwalo ko... jhand ho gayi hai meri zindagi... achchha hua, lund sahi-salamat hai aur barabar ladkiyo ko dekh kar khada hota rahta hai. Ab ye kaun aaya..."Bairangi ke ghar me ghus rahi ek car ko dekh kar maine socha 

"zaroor... randiya magwayi hongi, Bairangi ne. Uski biwi toh ab lawda choosne ke layak bhi nahi rahi... isiliye Bairangi ne rakhail bulwaya hoga... ya phhir hijdo ko bulwaya hoga... gandmara Bairangi... sala mujhe toh uspe pahle se hee shaq tha. Tabhi aaj mere lund ki taraf baar-baar dekh raha tha... Par usko maloom nahi ki yadi main chodunga toh uska bistar bhi uski biwi ke bagal me lag jayega... sala... tharki budhau... hattt.. iski maa ka..."
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Apni utsukta ki khatir ki is aane wali car me kaun hai ye dekhne ke liye main wahi stick ke sahare khada ho gaya...

"Toh ye hai doctor Boaz... maal hai ye toh... anyway..."waha se aage badhte hue maine kaha... par.. thoda aur aage jakar main peechhe muda aur phhir se us item ko dekha... dr. Boaz... Boaz.....

Main phhir aage badha par phhir peechhe palta aur abki baar pura peechhe palta... 

"Dr. Boaz... ghante ka Boaz... ye toh Angelina hai... Angelina... confirm.. Angelina hai... Arun ki maa ki kasam... hundred one percent... ye Angelina hai... ek minute abhi confirm karta hoon..."
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Main wapas teji se muda aur jaha Car khadi thi us taraf jitni speed se chal sakta tha... chalne laga... shuru me toh usne mujhe dekha bhi nahi par main jab hafte hue.. teji se uski taraf badhta raha toh wo meri taraf dekhi aur jab main uske aur paas gaya toh thoda peechhe khisak li...
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"Angelina... right.."khush hote hue main bola...

"Yeah..."

"Silva..."

"Yeah..."

"Angelina Silva... ?"maine ek aur baar puchha

"Yes... yes..."

" main Arman..."

"Nice to meet you, Arman..."

"Arey main... Arman... Shri Arman... the platinum bar"

"Nice to meet you, Shri Arman..."

"Arey main... hum dono camping ke dauran dam me mile the.. humne ek dusare se platinum bar me baat ki thi... phhir maine tumse sex karne ki apni ichchha bhi prakat ki thi jise tumne swikar kar liya tha... par actual me tum mujhe sabak sikhana chahti thi aur konte me lejakar chaku mar diya tha... remember...?"

"Oh God..! Meri mulaqat pagalo se hee kyu hoti hai..."upar dekhti hue Angelina boli aur phhir meri taraf dekhte hue apna sar hilane lagi...

"Chal na.. bahut hua. Kya natak kar reli hai.."

"Oh hello..... main na toh tumhe jaanti hoon aur na hee tumse kabhi mili hoon aur na hee kabhi... kya name bataya tumne..."

"Arman... single a"

"Aur naa hee is naam ke kisi shaks se mili hoon...."

"Natak band kar... bahut ho gaya... munda kharab hua toh Ajmeri bai ke paas bhej dunga..."

"Ajeeb aadmi ho... jab kaha ki main tumhe nahi pahchanti tab bhi chipke ja rahe ho.. pagal ho kya..."

"Haan.. love you."

"Suck your own balls..."ye bolkar Angelina ne mujhe dhakka diya aur waha se andar jaane lagi... 

Angelina ke dhakka dene ke karan mera balance bigda aur main wahi uske car ke paas neeche jor se gira... 

"Deeper i fall, higher i rise..." stick ke sahare khade hote hue maine kaha aur apni ghadi me time dekha...

"1 baje ye Bairangi ke yaha aati hai... par yadi ye... Bairangi ki lugayi ka ilaaz kar rahi hai toh phhir ye Dr.Boaz kaun hai aur Angelina mujhe ekdum se kaise nahi pahchan payi ya phhir jaan-buchkar mujhe na pahchanne ki acting ki.. ek minute..."

Maine, apna shirt uthaya aur kamar me chaku ka nishan check kiya.. jo ki tha. Yani Angelina mujhse mili thi aur usne chaku bhi mara tha... phhir BC pahchan-ne se inkar kyun ki...

"ab samajh me aaya ki log mujhse kitni nafrat karte hai. Par use dekh ke lag nahi raha tha ki wo acting kar rahi hai.. matlab wo full frustrate hui hogi... tabhi mujhe dhakka diya. Par ye kaise ho sakta hai... mujhe pakka yaad hai ki main camping me is se mila tha... warna mujhe iska name kaise maloom rahta... khair... abhi Daddu pe concetrate karta hoon.. Silva darling toh ab Nagpur me hee hai..."
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Main, Sidharth Singh Bairangi ke dono aadmiyo ke sath jail me ghusa... jail me, pahle toh unhone mujhe metal detector se gujara aur jab main metel detector test pass kar gaya toh unhone meri stick chheen li aur use check karne lage...

"Yadi mujhe Daddu ko marna hota toh tumhe lagta hai ki wo abhi tak zinda hota ? aur main front gate se aata..."deewar ke sahare khade hokar maine kaha...

"Aapad turungaat sodu ichchhita asalela tyacha mitra asu shakto..."

"Jaiiii Maharashtraaaaaaa...."main chillaya...

"Murkha vyakti..."

"Jo mujhe chodu samajhte hai... sabse jyada wahi chudte hai...anyway "
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Iske baad wo kuch nahi bola aur meri stick mujhe wapas kar di.. actually, wo bolna bahut kuch chahta tha.. par Bairangi ji ke naam aur unke do mustando ki vazah se usne kuch nahi kaha.. jiska nateeza tha ki aadhe ghante ke aur aise dand-fand procedure ke baad main Daddu ke saamne tha. Jis room me main tha.. wo kafi bada tha aur beech-o-beech salaankhen (trellis) thi.. salaankhon ke is taraf main tha toh us taraf Daddu... Mujhe zinda dekh uska khoon khaul utha aur khaulta bhi kyun nahi.. meri vazah se uska ladka jo mara tha.. wo salaankho ke peechhe se mujh par jhapatta marne ki koshish karne laga... galiya bakne laga... aur bakta bhi kyun nahi... meri vazah se uski rakhail jo mar chuki thi. Main Daddu ko aise hee tadapte hue... dekhta raha aur jab wo shant hua toh main uske paas gaya...

"Mere kutte ko apni taraf milakar tu khud ko bahut bada turram khan samajh raha hai.."

"kutta tune pala, boti maine khilayi... waise bhi main math ke field se hoon, mujhe bas last me answer laane se matlab hai, method koyi bhi ho, beech me kitni bhi kata-piti kyun na ho.. mujhe fark nahi padta. .. Tujhe College me mujhe maarne ke liye gunde nahi bhejne chahiye the.... tere karan main ek semester pura paper nahi de paya tha... maine meri ragging lene walo ko itna mara.. itna jaleel kiya toh phhir tujhe kaise chhod sakta tha... tune socha ki tere bhatije ko college ke kisi jhandu jaise ladke ne jhund banakar mara hoga... Par.. wo main tha, jisne tere bhatije ki daiyya-maiyya chod di thi... pura college yahi manta tha ki Gautam ka baap gunda hai.. main bhi yahi manta tha, par baad me mujhe pata chala ki unka asli source toh tu hai... Gautam ke baap ki yani Maravi ki gundagardi me mukhya kirdar toh tera tha. tere dum par Gautam ka baap uchka karta tha aur uchke bhi kyun na... tu uska saga bhai jo thahra... mujhe ye yaad nahi ki mujhe tere baare me kaise pata chala... bas ek din main utha aur mujhe tere baare me sab kuch maloom tha. Tu kaha rahta hai... kya karta hai.. kaha karta hai. Sab kuch. Mujhe toh ye bhi pata hai ki Nagpur se sate kis gaanv me tere katte bante the... par tera beta unexpected tha.. 5th dimension wale ne yaha mujhe dhokha diya, wo mujhe marwane ke full plan me tha.... "

"Tu mujhe jaanta nahi... main Daddu hoon... yaha se nikalne ke baad tere pariwar ke ek-ek aadmi ki gand me katta chalaunga... main kitna bada harami hoon tu abhi nahi jaanta. Tu sochta hai ki teri vazah se kuch randiya mar gayi, ya ek-do log ke pariwar ka naash ho gaya toh tu meri tarah bura ban gaya ? Burayi tune abhi dekhi nahi... main tujhe dikhata hoon... Bachpan me mera baap daru peekar ghar aata tha aur ghar me sabko nanga karke marta tha... fir chahe wo meri maa ho ya meri badi behan.. Mere ghar me sab mere baap se pareshan the.. Lekin main nahi... Balki main toh har din yahi prarthna karta ki mera baap aaj bhi daru piye aur sabko nanga karke mare, kyunki is dauran mujhe meri behan aur meri maa ko nanga dekhne ka mauka jo milta tha... phhir ek baar garmi ke dino me meri maa ko lakwa maar gaya... wo na toh kuch bol pati thi aur na hee apna sharir ka koyi hissa hila pati thi... hum do bhai aur ek behan the.. Hum teeno apne baap ke bharose the par mera baap daru peekar kahi bhi pada rahta tha... Maravi us samay bahut chhota tha, lekin mujhe duniya ki samajh ho chuki thi. Mujhe aksar kisi aurat ko chodne ki bahut ichchha hoti thi, par kahi jugad nahi jam raha tha... aur phhir ek din jab meri behan mere maa ke kapde badal rahi thi toh mujhe meri maa ki gori-gori chikni jaangh dikhi... jise dekhte hee mere andar kamukta ki lahar daud gayi.... main samajh gaya ki jis chiz ko main itne dino se bahar taalash raha tha wo toh mere ghar me hee hai...

Us din jab meri behan school padhane gayi toh maine Gautam ke baap yani Maravi ko khelne bhej diya aur apni maa ko hee nanga karke choda... maine apni maa ki gand bhi mari. Meri maa paralyzed bhale hee thi par wo shayad ye jaan gayi thi ki main uske sath kya kar raha hoon. Iske baad main sirf mauka dekhta tha ki kab meri maa mujhe akele mile... maine kayi mahino tak apni maa ko choda.... aur phhir ek din jab roj ki tarah meri behan school aur Maravi khelne gaya tha toh main bistar par apna lund tankaye chadha... maine, apni maa ki saree ko kamar tak khiskaya aur bur chatne laga... uski jaangh masalne laga... lekin jab main upar aaya toh dekha ki meri maa toh tapak chuki thi... wo toh bhagwan ko pyari ho gayi thi.. lekin main kya karta... ? Mujhe choot toh chahiye hee tha... upar se mera lund bhi khada ho chuka tha toh maine apni mari hui maa ko hee ulta paltaya.. use ghaseetkar tanki ke paas le gaya, uska gand saaf kiya.. phhir uski gand chati, uske gand me ungali ki aur phhir apna lund daal diya... kam shabdo me kahu toh maine meri maa ke mar jaane ke baad bhi use choda... meri maa ke jaane ke baad mujhe phhir se choot ki kami hone lagi, isliye maine abki bar apni behan ko nishana banaya... maine apni behan ko kayi din jabardasti bistar me baandh kar choda.. Maravi ko ye pata tha... lekin usne kisi ko kuch nahi bataya... shuru-shuru me toh meri behan natak karti thi lekin phhir jab maine kayi baar use chod diya toh phhir wo shanti se chudwane lagi... kya bolte hai use... compromise... hahaha... Maine use ye bhi bataya ki main... maa ko bhi chodta tha... jis par usne mujhe bataya ki use ye baat maloom thi. Main toh madarchod hairan hee rah gaya ye sunkar... par uske is shabd ne mere andar itna josh bhara ki main us din ghanto uski gand-choot chat-ta raha... maine use kayi baar Maravi ke saamne bhi choda aur phhir ek din apni behan ko Maravi se chudte hue dekha.... wo aisa isliye nahi karte the kyunki unka bhi mann karta tha.. wo aisa isliye karte the kyunki unke andar mera khauff tha.... jo ki ye sunne ke baad tere andar bhi hona chahiye... kyunki meri maa ke marne ke kuch mahine baad maine apne baap ko toilet saaf karne wali acid jabran pila kar maar diya tha. Wo bhi Maravi aur apni behan ke saamne... aur yahi sab main teri maa-behan ke sath bhi karunga aur tujhe aise hee zinda chhod dunga marne ke liye.. waise bhi teri halat mare hue insaan se badtar ho chuki hai..."

"heard of brains...? Brains are awesome, i wish.. you had one..."

Daddu ki baate mere dimag ki taar hila chuki thi... yadi wo salaankho ke us par na hokar... is paar hota toh main use jaan se hee maar deta. Par aisa tha nahi isliye aisa sochne me maine jyada waqt barbad nahi kiya...

main yaha aaya toh Daddu ko hilane tha par Daddu ne ulta mujhe hee hila ke rakh diya tha...
.

"Tu mere khandan ko khatm karne ki sirf baate kar sakta hai... lekin main sach me tera khandan khatm karne wala hoon... isiliye toh maine sabse pahle tujhe raaste se hataya... Ab tera bhai... behan.. tera pura khandan vulnerable hai... unhe maarne me mujhe jyada mushqil nahi hogi... jiske baad main Esha ke khandan ka number lagaunga... aur phhir apne khandan ka... tujhe mere maa-baap ya bade bhai se badla lene ki zaroorat nahi hai... unhe main khud maarne wala hoon aur ye sab karne ke liye mujhe teri jaisi nangayi chodne ki zaroorat nahi hai... tu bas dekhta jaa... kuch din baad Maravi ki maut ki khabar ke sath main khud yaha aaunga... main tujhe dikhaunga ki main kya hoon... the name is Arman... Arrogant Reputed Man.... Remember it.. brit."
.

Main waha se muda aur jaane laga... lekin mere dimag ke taar ab bhi hil rahe the. Main waha se bahar jaane laga...

"Tujhe lagta hai ki tu mujhse jeet chuka hai...? Pahle khud ko dekh ek baar... thik se chal bhi nahi sakta aur mere khandan ko khatm karega... mujhse badla lene ke liye tune zindagi bhar ke liye khud ko apahij banana swikar kar liya.. abhi toh tujhe lag raha hai ki tu ye sah lega... par baad me tu royega... sochega ki tujhe aisa nahi katna chahiye tha. Abhi tujhe hosh aaye hue din hee kitne hue hai. Ab Koyi jhat barabar launda bhi tujhe pel sakta hai aur tu zameen par kutto ki tarah pada gigiyata rahega... bahut maza aayega tujhe maarne me.... "

"Destiny will serve you... but are you prepared for the worst. Goodbye.. madarchod... Daddu... Aaj teri maa-behan ko imagine karke mutth marunga... waise teri behan zinda hai na abhi..? Main bhi use baandh kar hafto chodunga... Sala maza hee aa jayega..."
.
***Phase-2 Ended***

Phase-3: Multiverse~Pie in the Sky

Chapter-37: Flipside

Chapter-34: Flipside

Update-144

Daddu se ... yani Gautam ke sage uncle se milne ke baad main seedhe E-5 ke liye ravaana hua. Apne flat ke gate ke paas pahuch kar maine ek nazar E-4 par dali... Aur jaldi-jaldi ye socha ki ab mujhe kya karna chahiye... mere paas is samay do options the. First, ye ki main seedhe apne flat me ghus jaun ya phhir Rathi se milkar apni naukari ke baare me kuch puchhu ki... kya re Randi.. Main ab bhi Sharda Enterprises ka employee hoon ya chod diya mujhe... ??
.

Main bahut confuse ho raha tha ki kaun sa option choose karu... first ya second... aur jab ye confusion door nahi hua toh maine ek teesara option create kiya jisme both (a) & (b) tha. Yani main pahle apne room me gaya... hath-muh dhoya... kanghi-vanghi mar ke.. perfume vagerah dal ke... Rathi darling ke flat ke liye nikla... is dauran mujhe wo kayi pal yaad aaye jab mere hath-pair ekdum sahi-salamat the... jab main raat-o-raat, kisi bhi waqt VR ke ghar me boundary kood kar chala jata tha. Jab main raat-raat me Rathi ke flat me ghuskar mutth mar deta tha... Wo bhi kya din the.....
.

"Arrrmaaaaann... tum... "thoda khush, thoda aashcharya-chakit, thoda utsah ke sath Rathi ji boli... jiske baad maine bhi thoda khush, thoda aashcharya-chakit aur thoda utsahit hokar jawab diya...

"Abhi tak toh main hee hoon... aage pata nahi.."

"I knew, god would protect your sense of humour. Come inside..."saamne gate se hat-te hue Vandana mam haste hue boli par phhir turant peechhe mudi....

"do you mind taking off your shoes, i just cleaned and mopped the floor and I want to keep them clean... thank you . i really appreciate it. "

"Toh behanchod iske liye... itna engliah chodne ki kya zaroorat thi... seedhe-seedhe do shabd me bol deti ki... Jute Utaro..."bahar shoes utarte hue maine mann me kaha....

"Maine suna tumhare baare me... aur jo suna, jo dekha... uske liye unexpected word bhi kafi expected hai... matlab ek raat... achanak se police ka pura kafila tumhare ghar pahucha... unhone tumhe arrest kiya par phhir do din baad pata chala ki tum police ke sath milkar kaam kar rahe the aur is shehar ke sabse bade gunde ko police tumhari vazah se pakad payi..."

"Ye kya news me chhapa tha...? Phhir toh meri photo bhi aayi hogi..."
.

"Nahi... tumhare baare me toh koyi jaanta bhi nahi... par police dwara ek letter Sharda Enterprises me aaya tha.. jisme explain kiya gaya tha ki hum kyu tumhe naukari se na nikale..."

"Matlab main ab bhi aapka employee hoon..."

"Obviously..."

"Annual day nikal gaya... ? Kaisa tha..."

"Well, party was good but i dont want to hurt your feelings by telling you more about annual day.. "

" dont worry, I dont mind anything.. and i always miss the most destined party of my life..."sadak par parabolic curve banate samay main jaise pelaya tha us scene ko yaad karte hue maine kaha aur kuch der usi scene me raha... matlab chup-chap apne ateet me

"I gotta go now..."thodi der baad maine hee kaha... "Main apna resignation email kar dunga...."

"Tum resign... karrr... rahe ho.. Kyuuun.. "chauk kar Vandana Rathi boli "tumne shayad thik se suna nahi... Police ka letter aaya tha Sharda Enterprises me jisme unhone kaha tha ki..."

"Mera kaam ab yaha khatm ho chuka hai, isliye yaha jyada din rukne ka koyi matlab nahi.."VR ko beech me rok-kar maine kaha

"needless to say, but I always knew, you don't give a damn for this job and as far as my guess is correct you didnt come here in search of job. All this was a way to make your agenda successful... and now that... your undercover thing with police has worked... i dont think, you will do it more.. so why leaving.."
.

Vandana Rathi ke is sawal ka kya jawab dena maine thik nahi samjha.. kyunki main use batata bhi toh kya... Ki.. Ab main apna baki bacha badla lunga ? isliye VR ke is sawal par maine sirf apni million dollar wali smile di aur stick ke bharose dheere-dheere waha se bahar jaane laga... par mujhe mere aur Vandana Rathi ke beech ka ye conversation thoda adhoora-adhoora sa laga... mujhe yaad hai ki last time jab main Rathi ke yaha aaya tha toh bahut bada kaand kiya tha aur toh aur... wapas jaate samay koyi dialogue bhi mara tha... yahi sab sochte hue main gate tak pahucha....

" i did not get the chance to say sorry for that night.... that night means that... night..... i'm sorry..."

"I know... you wanted to get fired... that was your plan..."

"Plan... nah... i just wanted to fuck you that night.. Good Night"
.
.

Us din ganga-jamuna ke kand ke baad meri puri zindagi badal gayi.. pahle aksar Daddu aur NH-6 me loot karne ke baare me sochna padta tha... par ab ye dono mamle salat gaye the. Waise bhi ab main physically itna saksham nahi tha ki.. waisa kuch kar saku. Par phhir bhi mujhe ab bhi yaha bahut kuch karna tha... mujhe Nisha aur David se apna badla lekar jald se jald... Gautam aur Esha ke khandan ko marna tha. Main, Nagpur jis kaam ke liye aaya tha... wo kaam pura ho chuka tha. Halaaki uski bahut bhari kimat mujhe chukani padi... jiski maine parikalpana nahi ki thi... main yaha se aaj Daddu se milne ke baad hee chala jata par Angelina darling se hui meri aaj ki mulaqat ne mere kadam wapas nagpur me jama diye the... jiske baad abhi khali time me jab maine mujhse doglayi karne walo ke baare me socha toh paya ki Nisha aur David ko bhala main kaise chhod sakta hoon... un dono ne bhi toh mere sath wahi kiya... jo college time me Gautam aur Esha ne kiya tha... toh kyun na jab tak Nagpur me hoon in dono ka game baja doon... 
.

"Nisha..? Use kyu taad raha hai ? Waise bhi yadi Nisha aur David ko kuch hua toh... Police sabse pahle tere paas aayegi..."2.0 ne apna dimag yani mera dimag lagate hue kaha...

"Pahli baar me jab lund nahi ghusta toh chudayi band toh nahi kar dete... dobara lund ghusate hai na…waisich, Nisha bhi first time bach gayi thi… lekin abki baar ekdum nishane me aisa lund ghusaunga ki... zindagi bhar dard dega aur rahi baat police ki toh... Police na toh pichhali baar kuch ukhad payi thi aur na hee abki baar kuch ukhad payegi... next mission activated.. maza aayega, Nisha ki ek aur baar gand maarne me... bc bahut role de rahi thi... aur wo lawde ka baal, David... maaaadhaaaarchod... mujhe naukari dene wala tha... lawda mujh jaise param gyani ko newton kaku ka rule explain kar raha tha... abhi main usko batata hoon....."

"Ho jaye fir... par police ko sambhalne ki jimmedari teri..."

"Done..."

"Wait... Kahi ye sab 5th dimension wala toh nahi karwa raha..."

"No one can defeat me... unless i allow them..."

"Then let's go..."

"Abhi.... ? Itti raat me...? Pagal hai kya..."

"Kabira sir ka fan hoon main... kal kare so aaj kar........"

"Chal phhir.. waise bhi... tujhe kya... chalna toh mujhe hai. Uske ghar tak jaane me hee aadha ghanta lag jayega... madarchod police wale... lund me goli maar dete, pair me kyu mara..."stick ke sath cigarette ka packet uthakar maine kaha... 

" ab toh lawda cigarette jalane ke liye bhi deewar par tik kar khada rahna padta hai... Ki.. Kahi gir na jaun..."
______________________________

Update-145

Main apne room se nikla... park cross kiya... apna purana flat cross kiya, jaha ab Varun aur Sonam rahte the... un dono ne toh ab tak shadi bhi kar li hogi, aisa maine andaza lagaya....

"Mere sath... rahne wale... kaha se kaha pahuch gaye... ab Varun ko hee le lo... mere muqabale tha hee kya wo... aisa bhi nahi hai ki mera background kamzor raha ho.. mere paas bhi wo sab tha... jitna uske paas tha. Balki wo toh ekdum dhor tha school me... aise kayi example hai... kaise-kaise chutiya log kaha pahuch gaye... koyi lawda jhat sa dikhne wala... maal-e-maal pataye pada hai toh koyi betichod... foreign me naukari kar raha hai.... koyi behan ka lawda netagiri me utar gaya toh koyi business wagerah karne laga.... mujhe lagta hai... main hee bas ek defaulter hoon... khali... movies ki baat kar lo..."

"Kya kaam hai..."mere chintan me vighna daalkar ek aadmi ne mujhse puchha...

"Tujhe kyun batau be... ki mujhe kya kaam hai... chal hatt saamne se..."use dhakka dekar maine kaha... jiske baad usne mujhe pakda aur mujhe dhakka dekar girane ki bajay wahi ek chair par bithaya....

"Tu naya hai.. isliye mujhe nahi jaanta... Nisha meri maal hai..."
Jis par Nisha ke ghar ka guard mujhe ghoorne laga... ghoorne kya, apna daant peesane laga...

"Matlab ex-maal.."apna jawab update karke maine kaha... 

"Main yaha 5 saal se kaam kar raha hoon... Nisha madam ke ghar aane wale sabhi doato ki shakl mujhe yaad hai... tumhe toh kabhi nahi dekha..."

"Kyunki main din ke ujaale me nahi... balki raat ke andhere me aane wala dost hoon...”

is par wo mujhe aur jyada ghoorne laga 

“abey.. teri madam ka affair tha mere sath... ek saal tak. Affair matlab samajhta hai na... nahi... ? Affair... Affair matlab... gupt yaun sambandh jisme salagna vyakti se sabandhit logo ko kuch bhi pata nahi hota... waise… main jab-jab yaha aaya... teri jagah koyi aur tha..."

"Pee rakhi hai... kya... pichhale 5 saal se main yaha sikorti ka kaam kar raha hoon aur... main kar raha hoon matlab sirf main hee kar raha hoon..."

"Phhir wo dusara kaun tha... jise maine dekha tha..? Anyway.. let me go innnn.."khade hote hue maine kaha... par usne phhir se mera hath pakda aur mujhe wahi baitha liya...

"Ye kahi gay toh nahi hai.."use upar se neeche dekh kar maine socha... par tabhi Nisha ke bunglow ka bada sa darwaja khula...Darwaja khulte hee wo guard ekdum se salute marne wali position me khada ho gaya... 

"Arey baith lawda... in jhataho ko izzat dene ki zaroorat nahi hai..."
.

Nisha ke ghar se char log bahar nikle... Varun.. Sonam.. David aur Nisha... 
"now, dont be stranger.."Nisha ke gaal par fake kiss karte hue Sonam boli... jiska jawab Nisha ne same fake kiss se diya...

"ye sale, zaroor andar group me bf dekh rahe the... tabhi Sonam aur Nisha me abhi tak josh hai... waise… ek baar Nisha ko bf dekhkar kya choda tha..." 

Wo charo haste hue, ek-dusare se baat karte hue gate ki taraf aa rahe the. Jaise-jaise wo mere taraf aaye... un dhokhebazo ki tasveere andhere me clear hone lagi... maine Nisha ko dekha... 

"Sahi bolte hai log ki breakup ke baad ladkiya mast dikhne lagti hai... iska toh pura look hee change ho gaya… jab ise marunga toh bura toh bahut lagega... par kar bhi kya sakte hai... patthar me dil rakh ke marunga… ise"

“dude, it’s… dil me patthar.. not patthar me dil…”

“chup be… maine jo kaha, mera wahi matlab hai… dil me patthar rakhna…. yani.. majboori aur patthar me dil rakhna yani.. mazbooti…. ”
.

"Amaru, ye kaun hai..."Nisha meri taraf ungali dikhakar guard se puchhi aur apna baal peechhe karne lagi...

"Koyi bhikhari lagta hai..." Sonam boli...

"Toh kya ye koyi langar hai... jo yaha baitha rakha hai ise... bhaga yaha se isko..."uchi aawaz me David ne bhi mujhpar hath saaf kiya... jise follow karte hue ant me Varun bola...

"David, Aise logo ke toh muh hee nahi lagna chahiye... kuch kaam-dham toh karna hai nahi... bas zaroorat padne par dusaro ke saamne hath failana bas aata hai... aise logo ko inke maa-baap ghar se nikal dete hai... lekin phhir bhi inke bhuse bhare dimag me kuch nahi jata... inhe sirf ek hee kaam aata hai... wo hai.. bheekh magna.. Amaru, ise bahar kar... aur yadi na jaye toh police ko call kar dena..."

Maine un sabki puri baat suni... un charo ne mujhe bahut jaleel kiya... main bahut jala bhi par phhir maine apni billion dollar smile dete hue un charo se kaha...

"… Madarchodoo.... "

Aur mera itna kahna hee tha ki Varun... David aur Amaru mujhpar toot pade... mujhe toh ye bhi nahi dikha ki iske baad hua kya... mujhe unhone pakda... dhakela... neeche giraya aur ghaseet-kar security guard wale room me band kar diya aur us room ki light band kar di…

“come on… Arman.. You’re DareDevil… sense the things”us andhere kamre me idhar-udhar hath-pair marte hue maine kaha…

jiska darwaja phhir police ne khola...
.

"Yahi hai kya..."hawaldar ne baharwalo se puchha...

"Ab jab andar main hoon toh main hee na rahunga... hahaha..."police wale par haste hue maine kaha "akhand chutiya hai be tu.."

"Mujhe gali deta hai..."

"Gali toh main tere us T.I. Madhure ko bhi de chuka hoon.. NH-6"hint dete hue maine kaha... par us hawaldar ne hint nahi liya balki mujhe lekar seedhe police station aa gaya... 
.

Maine us hawaldar se kayi baar kaha ki main police ka hee aadmi hoon... main Madhure aur Shriwas dono ko jaanta hoon... lekin us hawaldar ne meri jhat ek bhi nahi suni aur jeep me baithakar thane le ja patka... sath me usne David ko bhi thane me bulaya... jispar, David ke sath Nisha bhi thane tak aayi.... aur uske baad David ne call karke Sonam aur Varun ko bhi thane bula liya...
.

"Us hawlu ne bulaya sirf ise tha.. tum kyun aa gayi... ? Itna pyar... meri toh aankhe hee bhar aayi..."thane me maine Nisha se kaha...

"Main tumhe jaanti hoon ?"mujhe dekh kar Nisha puchhi... ab wo har second-do second ke baad mujhe dekh rahi thi.... matlab ek taraf wo mujhse puchh rahi thi ki kya wo mujhe jaanti hai... toh wahi dusari taraf wo waisi harqat kar rahi thi... jaisi harqat usne tab ki thi.. jab main us-se first time mila tha...

kabhi-kabhi aisa hota hai ki ekich nazar me saamne wala achanak se pasand aa jata hai.. phhir wo chahe kaisa bhi ho. Par mere case me aisa nahi tha... Nisha ne pahle mujhe park me basketball khelte hue dekha tha.. phhir church ke bahar cigarette peete hue aur phhir park me shant baithe hue... jab main us-se first time mila tha tab wo aise hee mujhe har minute-do minute me palat-palat ke dekh rahi thi aur aaj bhi same scene repeat ho raha tha...

"Kahi toh dekha hai, ise... David ?"

"Kahi aur bheekh magte hue dekha hoga.... in logo ka ek pura network hee hota hai... abhi yaha kuch der toh kuch der baad kahi aur... aise log hee bheekh magne ke bahane ye dekhte hai ki kiska ghar khali hai aur phhir chori karte hai... ye hai toh bhikhari.. par main sure hoon ki iske jeb me iske haisiyat se jyada ka mobile hoga... ye in logo ko pahchan-ne ka sabse aasan tareeka hai..."beech me apni pond ghusedte hue Sonam boli…..

"Bhikhari nahi lag raha mujhe... thik se dekh.."bade gaur se dekhte hue Nisha ne kaha...

"Bhagwan se toh dar, Sonam. Kis angle se tujhe main bhikhari lag raha hoon.. bc bhikhari woodland ka shoes pahanta hai kya...."

Par hawaldar ne meri ek na suni aur meri taalashi lene laga… taalashi lene ke baad hawaldar ne mere jeb se mera mobile nikal kar Sonam ki baat confirm karne laga...

"Dekha.. maine kaha tha na... dekha, kitna mehanga mobile rakha hai..."

"Abeyyy.. tumhariiiiiii... wo isliye kyunki main bhikhari nahi hoon... akhand chutiyapa macha rakha hai, tum logo ne... abey main Sharda Enterprises me job karta hoon aur E-5 me rahta hoon.. yakin na aaye toh Mere manager Vandana Rathi ko phone karke puch lo aur tu.. mera mobile wapas kar.. galti se koyi button daba dega toh kahi Sidharth Singh Bairangi ko call na lag jaye..."

"Tu Bairangi sir ko jaanta hai..."Varun ne chauk kar puchha..

"He's my fan..."

"Maine zaroor tumhe kahi dekha hai..."Nisha phhir boli...

"silly girl… teri inhi harkato ki vazah se maine tujhe chhoda tha. Sala... sar pe chot mere lagi aur yaddasht in logo ki chud gayi... ya phhir natak pel rahe hai..." apni aankhe mijte hue maine socha..

"Maine bhi ise kahi dekha hai.." Nisha ke baad wahi paas me khade ek hawaldar ne bhi meri oor dekh kar kaha...

"Tune toh mujhe yahi dekha hoga be... kuch hafte pahle yahi toh tha main... yaad kar kaise kuch nahi ukhad paye the tum log mera aur phhir Daddu ko pakadwaya tha maine..."

"Ammraaan.. hai na.."

"Bitch please..."

"Arman...?"

" ye ho kya raha hai..... iska jo bhi naam ho, ye Amran ho ya phhir Arman… FIR darj karo iske naam..."David pura jor dekar bola...

"F.I.R. ? itni bhi jaldi kya hai..."thane me entry marte hue Shriwas ek hawaldar se bola "wo Khatik ki illegal daru bhatti wale case ki file lana toh... jisme wo bach nikla tha..."

Shriwas ko waha dekh mujhe thodi rahat mahsoos hui aur main ekdum se seena taankar khada hua... matlab khade hone ki koshish ki…

"Ab tune kya kiya..."

"Kuch nahi... bawle ho gaye hai ye charo... purani baat ka badla le rahe hai... bolte hai ki mujhe jaante hee nahi.. aur ulta chor bol rahe hai.."

"Tujhe hum sach me nahi jaante aur teri hasiyat bhi nahi ki tujhe hum jaane..."David gurrya "inspector, F.I.R. likho.."

"Really...? i mean.. really...? tum yaha aaoge aur chilla kar mujhe bologe ki F.I.R. likho..."

"Kisi ke ghar me bina jaan-pahchan ke koyi kaise ghus sakta hai... phhir isne hum sabko abuse bhi kiya..."

"Aap Nisha Desai ho na... kuch hafto pahle main tumse mila tha.."

"Haan... kisi Arman name ke shaks ke baare me puchhne ke liye ki... kya main use jaanti hoon.. ohhhhh my god..... oh my god... oh.my.god ab mujhe yaad aaya ki maine tumhe kaha dekha hai... ye Inspector tumhari photo lekar mere paas aaye the.. wahi maine tumhe dekha tha. Par tab tumhare chehre me ye nishan nahi tha... ye nishan kaise laga..."

" abeyyy… tumhariii…. mere se pahle tum log apna ilaaz karwao be... akhand chutiyapa pel rakha hai..."apna sar mijate hue maine kaha..."sala tum logo ki baat sunkar mere dimag me heart attack aa gaya..."

"Toh aap ise nahi jaanti..."Shriwas ne meri taraf ishara karke Nisha ne puchha..

"No... never.."

"Aur isne kiya kya..."

"Main batata hoon ki isne kya kiya..."Nisha kuch bolti uske pahle hee David ne bolna shuru kar diya... par jaise David beech me tapka tha waise Shriwas bhi beech me tapak gaya...

"Aap rahne do.. Nisha ji… aap boliye, please..."

" main.. my fiance, David.. my best friend Sonam and her fiance, Nishad..."

"Uska name Nishad nahi... Varun hai…. lodh.. Mere bachpan ka dost... Ye log jhooth bol rahe hai... aadhar card check karo uska…"

"I see that something bothering you. Take a deep breath and please, shuuut up" mujhe chup karate hue Nisha boli..
.

Ek toh main pahle se hee satka tha.. upar se in logo ki alag hee kahani chal rahi thi, jo ki meri kahani se bilkul match nahi kha rahi thi. Mere sar me ek baar phhir se dard utha aur maine chupchap wahi konte me peechhe deewar par sar tikaya aur apni aankhe band kar li...

"Ye madarchod kuch din se naye type ka hee dard shuru hua hai... dimag ekdum gooch-mooch ..gooch-mooch ho jata hai.. maa chudaye ye log.. thodi der so jata hoon..."
.

"Arman... oye.. Arman.. uth.. uth… be "

"So gaya tha kya... isko pani de"

"I was taking power nap.. anyway, What happenend and what is about to happened.."

"Nothing happened and nothing will happen... relax..."
.

Shriwas un charo ki taraf dekha aur bola.. 

"Toh aap charo jab Nisha ji.. ke ghar se bahar nikle toh aapne ise waha security guard ke paas dekha.... phhir aap sabne ise bhikhari kahna shuru kar diya jiske jawab me isne gali di.. mujhe nahi lagta ki aap logo ko ye baat aage badhani chahiye..."

"Par is-se pahle puchho ki ye waha kar kya raha tha.. mera matlab security guard ke paas ye kyu baitha tha..."

Shriwas meri taraf muda.. jis par maine apne kandhe uchka diye aur Shriwas ne phhir aankho se ishara kiya ki main kuch bol du... toh maine socha ki kyun na sach hee bol diya jaye...

"Main in charo ko maarne gaya tha aur guard mujhe andar nahi jaane de raha tha"
Maine kaha aur un sabki taraf dekha.. kisi ko bhi mujhpar yakin nahi ho raha tha.. sab mujhe aise nafrat se dekh rahe the, jaise maine Game of Thrones ka koyi suspence reveal kar diya ho..

"Okay... i'm a gay.. so is Nisha's Security guard.. main use us time mere sath sex karne ke liye pata raha tha... ab khush..."

"Chhhee... yuckkk... i'm outside.."bura sa muh banakar Sonam waha se chali gayi...

"Mera security guard gay hai... mujhe toh pata hee nahi tha "

"ek gay ko pahchan pana itna aasan nahi hai… Ek gay hee dusare gay ko pahchan sakta hai... aur main……….. I’m a gay and I’m proud of it…"

"So khatam kare... mujhe NH-6 par round pe bhi jaana hai.."

"NH-6 me round…? dakaiti karne wala to pakda gaya tha na... Daddu name tha uska... gun aur girl dono ki smuggling karta tha... "maine kaha aur has diya.. 
.

Nisha & gang waha se aise hee khali hath ravana hue.. unke jaane ke turant baad main Shriwas se bola...

"What the fuckkk… was that... wo charo bol rahe the ki wo mujhe nahi jaante ? aur main bata raha hu, uska name Nishad nahi.. Varun hai... uska id kyun nahi check kiya..."

"Kyunki main use jaanta hoon..."wahi table par rakha News Paper mujhe dete hue usne kaha... "Ganga-Jamuna ka article usi ne chhapa hai.. aankh fad ke padh le..."

"Usne apna name kab change kiya... isme toh Nishad Choudhary likha hua hai..."

"Same goes for Nisha.. wo bhi tujhe nahi jaanti... jab tune us din thane me kaha ki tu khud ko pagal saabit kar dega.. jiski gawahi Sharda Enterprises ki Manager.. RVC me Rahne wale Desai ji ki beti... vagerah-vagerah log denge... tab maine iski chhan-been ki.. main Desai ji ki ladki se mila.. tera name bataya... teri photo use dikhayi.. par usne tujhe pahchan-ne se inkar kar diya... tune apna purana address A-3 diya tha.. jaha Nishad rahta hai.. main waha bhi gaya aur us-se tere baare me puchha.. par wo bhi tujhe nahi jaanta tha..."

Itna bolne ke baad Shriwas shant ho gaya aur main...? Main….. toh… pahle se hee shant tha.. hum dono ek dusare ko tak-taki baandhe dekh rahe the.. Shriwas mujhe chutiya samajh raha tha aur main use... hum dono ke dimag ko is waqt heart attack aa raha tha...
.

"Dimag ghuma ke rakh diya tha tune.... ekdum khatm insaan hai be tu..."

"Bye..."stick zameen me tika kar khade hote hue maine kaha

"Teri shakl dekh ke nahi lag raha ki tu jhooth bol raha tha... 12 kyun baje hai teri shakl me.."

"Yeeee.. ye toh.. Performance de raha hoon main... waise bhi meri hamesha se ek philosophy hai ki... jhooth bolna buri baat nahi hai, thik dhang se jhooth na bolna… ye buri baat hai... "bahar jaate hue maine kaha "aur mujhe maloom tha ki uska naam Varun nahi balki Nishad hai.. wo toh main acting kar raha tha…. taaki wo log confusiya jaye…"
.
.

"What the fuck was that... i still feel Nisha's tight ass and her vagina pulsing… how the hell it happened and how the hell it didn’t happen"Police station se nikal kar main khud par chillaya.. 

"According to current situations.. tu kabhi Nisha se nahi mila.. tu kabhi David se anahi mila.. Sonam ka chutiyapa tere sath nahi hua aur jise tu Varun samajh raha tha.. wo Nishad hai aur uska door-door tak tujhse koyi lena dena nahi hai..."

"Matlab ye sab mera vahaaaammm thhhaaaaa... whhhhat thheeeee fuccckkkkk isssss happeningggg...."

meri aawaz slow hone lagi toh maine apne aas-paas dekha aur apne aas-paas dekhkar aisa laga, jaise duniya tabah ho rahi ho.. ped-paudhe apne aap chalne lage.. ghar toot kar phhir se banne lage.. ek pal din hota.. toh dusare pal raat.. ek pal mujhe kadake ki thand lagti toh dusare pal pura sharir paseene me naha jata.. kabhi baarish hoti toh kabhi kuch nahi hota.. sadke apne aap chal rahi thi.. sab kuch bahut teji se badal raha tha…. zameen upar uth rahi thi aur aasman neeche aa raha tha.. sab aapas me mix hone laga.. ped-paudhe.. gaadiya.. sadke.. ghar.. zameen.. aasman... mera sar bahut jor se jhannaya... aur main apna sar paadkar wahi neeche baith gaya.....

"That was a glimpse of five dimensional world... did you see that.."
Aawaz sunkar maine apni aankhe kholi... par saamne kuch nahi tha.. kuch nahi matlab kuch bhi nahi… naa koyi ghar… na koyi sadak aur naa hee koyi insaan… mere saamne is waqt sirf aur sirf… ghana andhera tha aur wo aawaz….

"That was a five dimensional world...? But how the hell i supposed to go a world.. whose channel is already closed... as you said.. "

"I was using the DMT produced in pineal gland inside your brain and guess what…. it fires the neurons.. normally, it creates hallucinations & feelings of being separated but sometimes it allows to visit another reality.. through mind.. not physically.."

"And what's the side effects..."jis taraf se aawaz aa rahi thi.. us taraf bhagte hue maine puchha... main us aawaz ke peechhe kafi der tak bhagta raha jiske baad mujhe samajh aaya ki main daud nahi raha balki tair raha hoon…

"You could become mad or you could die.. well, DMT.. alter the brain functions and grant access to knowledge of parallel universe.. by quantum computing."

"gand maraye DMT …. you tell me, why Nisha.. David.. Sonam and Varun didnt recognized me... were they right..? all that was just my hallucinations or..."

"they are right.. so are you.”

" how…"

" truth isn’t the truth and lie isn’t the lie……." 

" do you mind explaining it again because i still don’t get why you’re saying what you’re saying"

"i mean… All the incidents, you remember with Nisha and her friends.. that never happened here.. that all was took place in another space-time.. i still remember the day when you came to the Nagpur.. you're sitting in a park and Nisha came out of a church.. sit next to you... and here you had 2 options... talk to her or just ignore her. You did both and both created their separate space-time. You're living in that universe.. in which you ignored her in that park... but you have the memory in which you talked to her.. i mean… you're living in different space-time with different space-time memory."

"The hell it is... you are saying that.. somehow.. i captured the memory from parallel world and replaced it with my original one...okayy then.... how would you like to suck my balls"

"The scientists of your world call it... Cross-universe energy shift. In which multiple selves in multiple universes are affected by each other.. "

"And how the hell multiple selves affect each other.. i mean how i got the memory of my counterpart who lives in another space-time.."

"By dimensional transformation of conciousness... DMT produced inside your brain allowed you to jump over and experience multiple times & space... do you remember your counterpart Zelja.. Zelja ? For sometimes you transferred into his concious... the same way i did. multiple selves can affect one another.. actually, they do... that's why sometimes we think that what's happening, is already happened before... that's why.. sometimes you see a unknown person walking on the road and that person seems good to you, you feel good... you seem to like that person and on the contrary, sometimes you don't know a stranger yet you start hating that stranger for no reason "

"Kya hai BC... Mujhe hee samajh nahi aa raha toh bakiyo ka kya hoga"jab aadhe se adhik chiz mere upar se paar hui toh maine socha... par beizzati ke karan maine koyi sawal nahi kiya... aur isliye bhi sawal nahi kiya kyunki mujhe pata tha ki mujhe sirf sawal sochne ki zaroorat hai... 

"Okay.. i can make it simple... your Big-bank theory supported the phenomena... in which scientists considered univerae as a closed system.. i mean.. their is one main universe and inside that universe, infinite sub-universes lies in different space-time... but we, 5 dimensional people... we considered universe as a open system and we believe that their is infinite number of universes and it recieves energy coming from outside... i mean… from other universes... we believe that, universe in which we live is not the only one out there... infact, our universe is just one of an infinite number of universes... making up a multiverse. To understand it... consider space-time goes on forever, then it must start repeating at some point, creating another universe in another space-time..."

"Then why.. we, i mean... we… i mean… weeee… 3-dimensional people haven’t encountered any of the these universes...."

"Because you haven't looked far enough... if you look far enough, you would encounter another version of you- in fact, infinite versions of you... in which some of the Armans will be doing exactly what are you doing right now, while others not... some Armans love Esha the same way you do... while some hate her... and in one of these worlds, Esha would be dying to get you... or in one of these… you don’t even know her… your universe is just a small bubble in a vast sea of space and that space contains other bubbles too… i mean… other universes or worlds.. i'm sure there would be also some worlds where humanity is no more but it still exists"

"You said.. our memories travel from one universe to another universe by some kind of energy shift... in which, respective universe recieves energy from another universe..."

"Yesss.."

"Then how these energy select the target universe among the multiverse.. i mean… how, the memories of that Arman, who talked to Nisha in that park... transferred in me... who ignored her..."

"By Telepathy and Brainwaves... "

"by telepathy… ? seriously…? one universe to another universe by telepathy…"

"i don’t think you know very much about telepathy… and yesss… by Telepathy. Telepathy is not affected by contraints of time and space... Telepathy often found between twins. They transfer information... thoughts.. thinkings from one side to other side through brainwaves or atleast, they feel this connection and it happenes because of brainwaves with similar transmission and reception mechanism... that’s how you connected to Zelja and the other Arman.. who that day talked to Nisha in that park... that's how i get connected to my counterparts in multiverse... I, you and all my counterparts in multiverse are similar to each other in terms of… of our biological body structure. Our brainwaves more likely to have consistent transmission and reception mechanism.. this forms a channel, which connects all the selves in multiverse just like multiple computers are connected with a transmission line. It's what we call.. cross-universe energy transfer system"

"do me a favour for a favour… make me 5 dimensional and i'll reopen the channel to your home... "

"I'll do it.. if you make trees to see the wold.."

"I can’t… i mean… they can’t.. they aren’t meant to see things or hear things.."

"Same answer.. i can’t make you 5 dimensional and you can’t become 5 dimensional... you can’t even see the fifth dimension(hyperspace/Shrinkage)…. 3-dimensional people are not conscious to see the fifth dimension... you can learn about it.. you can think about it.. but you can’t visualize it.."

"But i've seen the 5th dimension.. that shrinkage... a while ago.. am i transferring into higher dimension...?"

"That wasn’t you.. that was my conscious and because of it…. now, you can visualize the 5th dimension.. as you've seen it through me..."

"What is happening... i feel gooch-pooch.. gooch-pooch.."

"You're in the bottom of space.. now you're going to your world... i mean your universe..."

"Why you answered my all questions..."

"What do you think... from where you get the quality of showoff..? I get bored in nano seconds and most important... i wanted you to believe me.. it makes me easier to kill you... See you Later, Alligator.."

"See you Later.................... Traitor..."
.

Aur phhir ek baar phhir wo sab hua.. phhir se kayi chize mix hui.. aur phhir se main chillaya..... par abki baar khush hokar

"Maza aa gaya... mood fresh ho gaya behanchod.."hawa me gand-fad uchak kar maine kaha aur seedhe sadak ke kinare zameen me gira... jiske baad main apna pichhwada malte hue khada hua ki tabhi mere saamne koyi anjaan shaks aa gaya...

"Chal be baju hatt... you, 3-dimensional ordinary people..."saamne wale aadmi se maine kaha... jispar wo mujhe ghoorne laga...

"Nikal le lawda.. warna har ek universe me dhoondh-dhoondh kar marunga..."

"Pagal hai kya..."

"Chal bhag lawda... apne se kam smart logo se toh main baat hee nahi karta... sale 3 dimenson wale log"
.
.

Toh kahani ye thi ki Nisha aur Varun ka pura chapter... real toh tha.. par real nahi tha.. mera matlab main ise puri tarah jhooth bhi nahi kah sakta aur na hee sach.. kyunki…

"truth isn't truth and lie isn't lie.. that’s the concept of multiverse "
.
.

"Dr. Angelina Silva, Nagpur" room pahuchkar maine apna lappy khola aur Angelina ko online dhoondhane laga...

Kyunki mujhe pakka yakin tha ki jab Bairangi kisi doctor ko personally bulayega toh wo Doctor toh normal hogi nahi... matlab kafi famous hogi aur famous logo ko dhoondhna jyada mushqil nahi hota... 

"Dr. Angelina Boaz.. isme toh Boaz likha hai.. meri wali toh Silva hai.... aur koyi doctor ka name bhi nahi aa raha... Angelina Silva hee toh Angelina Boaz nahi... ? Photo bhi nahi hai sala... ek minute..... Bairangi ke yaha jab main aaj gaya tha tab wo mujhe bata raha tha ki uski biwi ka ilaaz karne wale Doctor ka name Doctor Boaz aur....... jiske baad, maine kaha tha ki... i'm not interested, mujhe sirf Daddu se milna hai... Bairangi ne Boaz ka naam liya tha, jiske baad Angelina mujhe waha dikhi... aur yaha screen par Angelina Boaz likha aa raha hai.. yani Angelina Silva hee Angelina Boaz hai aur usne apna surname change kiya... matlab uski shadi ho chuki hai... maza aayega.. main hamesha se kisi shadi-shuda aurat ko chodna chahta tha aur Angelina se better option toh koyi ho hee nahi sakta tha... ek toh umra me 4-5 saal badi.. upar se famous doctor.. highly successful... matlab perfect item.... ."

Maine Angelina ka address, clinic address, jis hospital me wo doctor thi.. waha ka address yaad kiya aur bistar par letkar Angelina ko sochte hue mutth marne laga....

"So, what about Nisha & Co. Shouldn’t we make plans to kill them..?"

"You didn’t hear 5D-man.. ? I'm not the one who talked to Nisha in that park.. i'm the one who ignored her... tabhi main sochu ki main itna burchatta kaise ho gaya... balki main toh wo hoon.. jisne us dusare universe me rahne wale Arman ka breakup karwa diya... lodh.."

"Tune karwa diya..?"

"Matlab 5D-man ne kaha toh ki main wo brainwaves ke through different space-time me tha.. yani us space-time me yani dusare universe me Nisha ke sath us universe ke Arman ke jo sambandh kharab hue.. wo meri vazah se hue.. meri conscious ke karan hue.. "

"Toh phhir jab tu waha tha toh yaha actual me kya huaaa……....."

"Nisha ke sath mere chakkar ko blank kar de.. baki Daddu wala matter waha bhi raha hoga.. kyunki main Nagpur aaya hee isiliye tha... matlab ye samajh ki mujhe mutth marna tha.. ek me maine baye hath se mara aur ek me daye hath se… lekin mutth mara zaroor… ab mutth ko Daddu se replace kar de… clear…….?"

" ab aage kya.... Nisha & Party ko maarna hai ya... chale apni karmbhoomi... Esha se mile bahut din ho gaye. Is halat me toh wo pahchanegi bhi nahi..."

"Kuch din baad chalte hai..."

"Angelina...?..?"

"Oh teri...."

"Kya hua..."

"Isiliye Angelina mujhe nahi pahchan payi..."

"ab nahi…. abhi nahi"

"Kyunki main us-se kabhi mila hee nahi.. ye bhi kisi dusare universe me hua hoga.. jo ki brainwaves ke through mere yaddasht me shamil ho gaya... warna....... iska matlab mujhe jo meri zindagi yaad hai, wo purely... surely ... meri nahi hai... ye actual me multiverse me hue incident ka combination hai... jaise.. yaha maine NH-6 aur Ganga-Jamuna me kand kiya... aur Nisha ko kisi aur universe me mere counterpart ne pataya hoga.. par brainwaves ke through humari memory mix ho gayi yani yaha ki memory waha aur waha ki yaha... ab samajh me aaya pura khel... Mandela Effect bolte hai ise... "

"one more…. suck"

" mujhe jagah ka naam nahi maloom.. par ek baar pata nahi koyi programme tha ki kya tha…. waha baithe logo se Nelson Mandela ke baare me puchha gaya.. jinme se lagbhag 20 logo ka ye manna tha ki Nelson Mandela ki death 1980 me ho chuki hai.. jabki us samay Nelson Mandela jinda the.. sab un 20 logo par hasne lage.. ki kitne gadue insaan hai. GK kitna weak hai. Par jab unka background check kiya gaya toh wo bade-bade turramkhan nikle... phhir wo Nelson Mandela ke baare me kaise galat ho gaye.. yahi nahi, unhone ye bhi bataya ki Nelson Mandela ki maut kaise hui... surprisingly, un sabki story match kar gayi.. jiske baad ye niskarsh nikala gaya ki unki conscious us parallel dimension me rahi hogi, jaha Nelson Mandela 1980 me plane crash me mar gaye ya phhir memory mixing... that's the Mandela effect.. in simple language..."

"Matlab, Angelina tere se kabhi nahi mili.. phhir toh teri college life me.... main kya bolta hoon.. maa chudaye, ye chhote log.. apan , apni karmbhoomi chalte hai aur Waha chalkar clear kar lete hai ki actual me kya hua tha.. kya pata koyi aur hee fascinating story mile.."

"Angelina se milna hai.. "

"Chal chhod na.."

"Chup be.. itne update intezaar kiya hoon.. aiwe hee jaane du kya... waise bhi mujh jaise mutth manav ko aur kya chahiye.. log faltu me bolte hai ki meri kismat jhand hai.. jabki, jhande toh main hee gaad raha hoon.. baki toh jhande gand me le rahe hai... hahaha.. Angelina Silva… hold your Vagina... The Shagman is coming.................. "
.

Iske baad maine do din kuch nahi kiya.. kahi nahi gaya aur room me pade-pade Prison Break ke baki bache episode dekh mara... Ganga-Jamuna kand ke baad mujhe ek fayda jo hua tha wo ye ki ab meri neend na aane ki problem ekdum se salat gayi thi.. ulta ab mujhe har samay neend aane lagi thi.. pichhale do din me mere andar jo badlaav hua tha wo ye ki har 2 se 3 ghante ke baad mera sar ghoomta hai aur itni jor se ghoomta ki mujhe apne aap neend aa jati thi.. jiska maine in do dino me ilaaz bhi dhoondh liya tha.. iska simple ilaaz tha ki har 2 se 3 ghante me ek jhapki khud se mar lo...
.

"Come on, man.. you're the only person in this world.. who have seen the 5th dimension/hyperspace.. and you're going to that ordinary Doc..."

"Yugpurush aise hee hote hai... wo chhote se chhote logo ko bhi aage badhne ka mauka dete hai.. phhir chahe wo apne maa-behan ko chodne wala Daddu hee kyun na ho..... "

"You're comparing 5th dimension with Daddu... really.. ?”

"Shut up..."Memorial Hospital ki site kholte hue maine kaha "ye maine dabaya submit key.. aur ye bheja Dr. Angelina Sillva aka Mrs. Boaz ko apna medical record.. bas appointment de de..."

"You're totally fucked.. and still showing that..."

"I dont have time for this conversation."topi lagate hue maine kaha aur aaine ke toote hue tukdo me se sabse bade wale tukde ko uthakar bola "mere chehre par jo cut mark hai wo mast lag raha hai... hai na.. main faltu me tension le raha tha.. ab toh sab mujhe dekhte hee fati me aa jayenge.. mujhe dekhte hee moot marenge..."

"Chal be, langdu-lal.."
.

Main pure din intezaar karta raha Memorial hospital ke taraf se kisi responce ka.. par jab pure din udhar se koyi responce nahi aaya toh maine raat me bhi intezaar kiya.. par dusare din subah mere mobile me messege aaya ki.. Dr. Angelina Boaz ke sath mera pahla session 11 baje se hai.. 
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Maine ye messege.. messege dekhkar khush hua aur phhir confirm karne ke liye ek aur baar ye messege dekha aur ek aur baar khush hua... par mujhe laga ki kahi ye mera delusion vagerah na ho.. isliye maine teesari baar bhi dekha... ye sach hee tha. Phhir ye check karne ke liye ki kahi main yani meri conscious parallel universe me toh nahi hai... maine boundary wall ko dekha... jisme maine kal raat Sonam ki maa ka bhosda likha hua tha...

"Confirm.. messege bhi real hai aur ye duniya bhi... ab jab main Angelina se milne jaunga toh koyi nangayi nahi chodunga.. ek dum ek shikshit, shisht, 5-D manav ki bhaati vyavhar karunga.. "room se bahar nikalte hue maine kaha...

"Iski maa ka... Itni dhoop ? Dahini aankh se toh abhi hee nahi dikh raha.... I hate sun... "
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Jab se mujhe pata chala tha ki Nisha aur Angelina mujhse kabhi nahi mili aur ye sara khel consciousness ka hai, jisme main ek second yaha toh dusare second kahi aur... isliye aur aage confusion na ho, isliye maine Etching Needle liya aur jaha-jaha jata waha A letter, Etching Needle(EN) se ukerta ja raha tha.. EN, ek pen ke mafiq, pen jitna hee bada tha.. bas fark itna tha ki body wooden thi aur nib, iron ki... mere room se MBD Restaurant ke beech kayi ghar aaye, kayi ped aaye.. jaha maine EN se A shabd ukerate hue MBD ki taraf badhta gaya...

"One table for one..."gate kholkar dandana ke andar ghuste hue maine kaha 

"Follow me, please..."

Waiter ne mujhe ek table me bithaya aur phhir menu meri taraf khiska ke bola...

"What would you like to start with?"

"Samosa.. bana ke.. aur jab main first plate kha loon toh mujhe next plate mere table me hona magta… ek second ka bhi interval nahi hone ka"

Maine Samose ka order diya aur phhir table par needle se A... banane laga... kyunki parallel dimension me bhi same to same aisa hee MBD restaurant hai, jaha main kayi baar Nisha se mil chuka hoon.. isliye ab jab bhi main yaha aaunga toh ye mark dekh kar samajh jaunga ki main kaha hoon... par isse bhi bada sawal ya phhir confusion ye tha ki 4.0 ke karan jo mere andar dimension travel karne ki ability aa gayi hai…. ye kab se chal raha tha..? Mujhe toh zara sa andaza tak nahi tha. Tabhi mere mobile me alarm baja.. maine alarm off kiya, apni gardan peechhe ki aur so gaya.. taaki mere dimag me kuch ghanto ke baad uthne wala dard na uthe... actually jab se Ganga-jamuna ke kand ke baad mere jagne ki limit 2-3 ghante hee rah gayi thi.. iske baad mujhe har haal me kuch der ke liye sona hota tha... warna mera dimag bahut tej dard deta tha.... isliye... issssllliiyyyeee....
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"Dekh Arun, ye jhat... yaha aake career guidance de raha hai... do saal pahle kaise ladki ke chakkar me college ke saamne, sabke saamne ro raha tha... "

"People judge people by their success. If you're successful, then no matter how cheap and chutiya you are... people will admire you..."

THE END

"matlab kal yadi main bhi kamyab aadmi ban gaya toh mujhe bhi log aise hee dil aur dimag se sunenge... "

"Aur nahi toh kya... sara khel hee kamyabi ka hai, bidu... wo bhool jayenge ki tu wahi Arman hai.. jo nangayi choda karta tha. bewda, darua.. jaise prefix tere naam ke aage se hat jayenge aur yadi kisi ko tere purane kand yaad bhi rahe toh bhi kuch khas fark nahi padega... dekha kaise, baato hee baato me maine tujhe tera past change karne ki tarqeeb bata di aur tu kaha, kal puri raat time travel through wormhole ke baare me Sulabh Sauchalaya se bahas kar raha tha… chal, papa bol... "
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"Sir..."

"Kya hai behanchod..."jhatke se apni aankh kholte hue main badbadaya...

"Your order.."

"Thanks... par thanks kahe ka.. kaun sa tu mujhe free me serve kar raha hai... in fact tujhe toh ulta mujhe thanks kahna chahiye… chal thank you bol.."

Mere aas-paas rahne wale log aksar mujhe pata nahi kyun ghoorte rahte hai.. ab jaise MBD ka pura waiter samaj mujhe ghoor raha tha.. jiske baad maine waiter samaj ko apni trillion doller smile di.. aur chammach uthakar, extra pyaj lane ke liye kaha

"Maza aa gaya... bahut miss kiya samosa…”

Samosa khate-khate maine MBD restaurant me baithe bhookhe-nango ko dekha, jo 10 baje se hee muh faad kar yaha aa gaye the aur ek table me jakar…meri nazar atak gayi...

"Nisha aur David... badhia hai. Main bhi yadi Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ko Vipin bhaiya ke engagement ke dauran pata leta toh aaj main bhi uske sath kisi aise hee restaurant me baitha hota... upar se madharchod ka 28 lacs ka package... usi ke paise se usi ke saamne dusari maal patata..."

Samosa khate hue, Nisha ki taraf dekhte hue main Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ke baare me soch hee raha tha ki… achanak Nisha ne meri taraf apna hath hawa me uthakar ungaliya hawa me hilayi... yani mujhe hii... kaha.. jiske turant baad maine table ke ek kone me banaye A.. ko dekha ki kahi baithe-baithe toh main parallel universe me transfer nahi ho gaya... 

"A.. toh hai, phhir ye mujhe kyun hath dikha rahi hai... yaha toh main ise jaanta bhi nahi… matlab jaanta hoon, par naa ke barabar… "

Maine Nisha ko koyi response nahi diya… Jis par usne ek aur baar mujhe dekh kar ungaliya hawa me firayi... jispar maine ek aur baar apne banaye nishan…A… ko dekha aur….. Nisha aur uske agal-bagal me baithe logo ka jayja lene laga...

"Sali, mera mazak udane ki koshish kar rahi hai.. lagta hai. Yadi main responce dunga toh iska gang jo iske agal-bagal baitha hai mujhpar hasne lagenge... par main bhi inka baap hoon... ye mujhpar hase, us-se pahle main hee in par bematlab ka has deta hoon.. par nahi.. mujhe khud ko mature karna hai in chhote logo ko ignore karna hai.."

Maine Nisha ko koyi responce nahi diya, par is dauran Nisha ko barabar dekhta raha... bahut der tak dekhta raha aur aise aankh fad-fad kar aise dekha ki David waha se uthkar seedhe mere paas aane ko majboor ho gaya...

"Meri fiance ko kya dekh raha hai be, itni der se"

"Wo bhi toh mujhe itni der se dekh rahi hai.… itti der se" maine kaha aur samosa khatam karne ke baad jo chatni bachi thi use plate utha kar peene laga... "maza aa gaya bahinchod... maal dekhte hue samosa khane ka maza hee kuch aur hai..."

"Tune Nisha ko maal bola.. kyu be.."

"Maine sirf maal bola aur yaha bahut maal hai.. ho sakta hai ki main Nisha ke bagal wali ko maal bol raha hoon ya phhir uske bagal wali ko.. ya phhir uske bagal wali ko.. tu topic change mat kar.. topic Nisha ko tadne ka tha... Nisha ko maal bolne ka nahi…"

"Ahhha.. haa. Haan.. tu kyun dekh raha tha meri fiance ko.. aur ye mat bolna ki wo tujhe dekh rahi thi... kyunki wo tujhe nahi, balki tere peechhe baithe RVC me rahne wali Mrs. Arora ko dekh kar hiii.. kar rahi thi.."

"Mrs. Arora..."peechhe palatkar maine kaha.. "hii, Mrs. Arora aaannnd... ...Miss. Arora.. ?. right ?"

Jis par Mrs. Arora ke sath baithi Miss. Arora ne meri baat ka koyi jawab nahi diya... 

"Tu idhar dekh... udhar nahi..."mera sar pakad kar saamne apni taraf karte hue David bola...

"Seriously..? Tu mujhse sirf isliye ladna chahta hai, kyunki maine us taraf dekha jis taraf teri fiance baithi hui thi.. ? I mean, seriously...? Aur waise bhi main Nisha ko nahi, balki uske peechhe wala glass art dekh raha tha.. matlab kya banaya hai.. ekdum se guch-puch.. guch-puch kar diya do-teen rang ko.. par hum dono ko pata hai ki ye sach nahi hai.. naa toh main wo glass art dekh raha tha aur na hee Nisha Mrs. Arora se hii.. hello kar rahi thi... kyun ?"

"Par tune use pahle dekha.. galti teri hai.."

"Ab choot lawde me gire ya lawda choot me, chudna toh choot ko hee hai na... same concept aur Kya chutiyo ki tarah lad raha hai.. tu jaana bhai, apna kaam kar...."

"Behanchod langde... kya bola Nisha ke bare me..."mujhe maarne ke liye David ne apna hath uthaya aur usi samay mujhe andaza ho gaya ki ab aage kya hone wala hai... 

David waha isiliye aaya tha.. wo us raat ka badla lene aaya tha. Par mujhe ek baat ab tak samajh nahi aayi ki David, Varun/Nishad, Sonam mujhse pahli hee mulaqat me kyun nafrat karne lage.. unki pelayi toh parallel universe wale Arman ne ki thi... phhir kal raat pahli hee mulaqat me wo mujhpar kyu bhadak gaye ? Aur ye David.. sirf itni simple si baat par mujhse ladne kyun aa gaya...

"multiple selves can affect one another.. actually, they do... that's why sometimes we think that what's happening, is already happened before... that's why.. sometimes you see a unknown person walking on the road and that person seems good to you, you know nothing about him yet you start feeling good... you seem to like that person and on the contrary, sometimes you don't know a stranger yet you start hating that stranger for no reason "
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Maine David ka hath apni taraf aata dekh ethching needle nikala aur uske hatheli me ghusa diya.. David jor se chillaya aur mujhe gali bakte hue jor-jor se apna hath jhatkarne laga.. Nisha aur baki log bhi waha turant aaye... MBD ka pura staff meri taraf dauda.. is beech mere aas-paas baithe logo ne mujhe jabarjasti pakad kar uthaya aur wahi neeche dhakel kar, mujhe maarne lage.... 
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"Par tune use pahle dekha.. galti teri hai.."

"The hell it is... what just happened..."

"Kya matlab tera..."

"Ye sab psychological baate hai, tu nahi samjhega..... oh my physics "apni quadrillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine kaha "grow up kiddo, ye jo tu aaj kar raha hai na.. wo sab karke main bahut aage badh chuka hoon aur ek golden tip…. yadi kisi ko marna ho toh us-se itni jyada baat nahi karte... "

"Dar gaya salaaa... langda...hahahaha...."bolkar David hasa aur uske hasne ke baad uske sathi bhi has pade... mujh par comment pass karne lage. Lekin maine kuch nahi kaha.. kuch nahi kiya...

kyunki main iska nateeza dekh chuka tha. Kyunki David , Nisha, Sonam & Gang ab wo David , Nisha, Sonam nahi the.. jo mujhse khauff khate the aur na hee ab main wo Arman tha… meri sharirik kamjoriyo ne mere hath baandh ke rakh diye the... khair… wo sab mera mazak banate rahe.. koyi langda bolta, toh koyi taklu.. toh koyi badaurat, toh koyi chor, toh koyi tapori... ek ladki ne toh behanchod lesbo tak bol diya... 
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Main wo sab sunte hue dheere-dheere exit gate ki taraf badhta raha aur is dauran main… Nisha aur uske dosto ke bagal se bhi guzra.... toh Nisha muskurate hue boli

"I think, you ain't paying attention but my friend, Sonam just call you.. A lesbo .. Lol ... the way, last night... you were behaving in the police station, I did not think that you would be such a big coward.. guys, last night, he was fluttering in front of his inspector friend but now look at him.. "

Nisha ke ye katu vachan sunkar main bahar jate hue ruk gaya... maine 2-3 lambi saans peli aur phhir apni Quintillion dollar ki smile ke sath Nisha ke paas gaya.. paas matlab, ekdum paas... 

"Listen, rich..bitch.. deep down, we both know.. you like me more than David and You could not sleep that night because you were thinking about me. So, stop your silly showoff... because, if abusing or leg-pulling is an art then i'm the fucking Artist.."

Nisha ke baad main Nisha ke saheliyo ki taraf mukhatib hua... "and you all... 3-dimensional ordinary people... first raise your dimension, then raise your voice.... . "

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"Toh aapko Doctor Angelina se milna hai.."apne computer par khat-khit khat-khit karte hue Memorial Hoapital ke reception me baithi laundiya boli "aur aapka name hai.. Shri Arman...... nice name... seems married... anyway, Dr. Angelina is on second floor... "

"Thank you for…. Spending… time… with… me..." jaate hue maine kaha.. jis par wo receptionist mujhe dekh kar thodi der tak muskurati rahi...

"Main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hoon.. ladkiya toh mujhse yun hee pat jaye..."
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Mujhe samajh nahi aa raha tha ki main kya karu.. kya kahu. Main abhi uske saamne baitha tha jiske liye maine na jaane kitne universe ko paar karke aaya tha. Par haqiqat ye thi ki jiske liye main itne universe ko paar karke aaya tha.. wo mujhe nahi jaanti thi. Maine Angelina se andar aane ke liye thik usi tarah permission mangi, jaise school me ek bachcha class me andar aane ke liye permission mangta hai.. phhir maine couch me baithne ke liye bhi permission manga.. 
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Angelina ka ye office kahne ko toh hospital me tha, par phhir bhi hospital ke mafiq kuch nahi tha. Waha ghar ke mafiq sofe the.. bookshelf tha.. exercise karne ke equipments.. traedmill vagerah the. Phhir meri nazar bookshelf ke baju me gayi.. jaha 3 alag-alag size ke microscope rakhe hue the.. jiske paas glass ki slide bhi thi... Angelina ka office itna bada aur aisa tha jaise mano Memorial hospital ke andar ek aur hospital tha.. matlab itna vishal... phhir meri nazar thoda aur door gayi, jaha ek bed tha aur uske aas-paas duniyabhar ki boring machines... par meri nazar deewar par likhe ek quotes par atki...

"Nothing human is alien to me..."

"Yeeeah... Yee mere type ki hai..."quote padhne ke baad maine khud se kaha aur ek-do aur quotes padhne ki liye maine deewar par aage nazar daudayi...

"When i look at the world, i'm Pessemistic but when i look at the people, i'm optimistic"

"Ye toh bilkul bhi meri tarah nahi hai..."
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Main bahut der tak aise khamosh baitha raha, maine waha ki har ek chiz ko observe kiya 

"Ek ghante ke session me tumne aadha ghanta barbaad kar diya hai.. "chuppi todte hue Angelina boli..

"Oh sorry, Doc.. main Arman..."

"I know, who you are.. but what i dont know is why you are…………. here.."

"You're a doctor, i'm a patient... "

"Ohhhk.so, What do you think about the quotes written on the wall"

"I hate them... and that's why, i'm here... i hate everyone.. everything.. even that white pen in your table…. racist sala"

"And what about me. You hate me too..?"
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Angelina ke is sawal par main ruka....

"keep nothing back... be straight up"
Par main ruka hee raha.. maine koyi jawab nahi diya..

"Come on, Arman... why on earth you're taking too much time to answer a simple question.. ? you hate me or not.. ? And please, tell the truth because i have 99 ways to know that.."

"You see, doc.. that's the problem here.. truth isn't the truth and lie isn't the lie... what will be your reaction...if i tell you that somehow i got the ability to go in another universe... how will you react if i tell you that i've already met you in another world and That is how, on that day outside of Barangi's house.. when I met you, I knew your name .. whatever I told you on that day, it was not all lies..."

"Okay..."

"Ye sach hai.. mere paas parallel universe me jaane ka channel hai.. par actual me main nahi jaata.. meri consciousness travel karti hai.."

"Ookay..."

"You dont trust me.."

"I do want to trust you.. But first , you tell me how you transfer your consciousness from one world to another... is it your some kind of genetic quality or you have any secret appliance. Like the one..in inception movie. If yes, then please show me."indirectly mera mazak udate hue Angelina boli.. 

Is session ke liye jab main apply kar raha tha tab hobby aur khali samay me main kya karta hoon.. iska ek column tha.. jaha maine... patti khelna, watching hollywood movies, tv series bhara tha.. aur yahi se point pakad kar Angelina ne abhi-abhi mujhpe tanj kasa tha... maine uski taraf dekha... wo ekdum serious thi.. matlab usne abhi just mera mazak udaya par ekdum serious thi.. maine ab use upar se neeche tak dekha aur bas dekhta raha.. bahut der tak dekhta raha.. is dauran wo bhi mujhe dekhti rahi.. usne mujhe ratti bhar bhi disturb nahi kiya... shayad wo mera dimag padh rahi thi.. ya phhir mujhe padh rahi thi... waise dono same hee hai… 

"Chodaaa leee.."Angelina ki aankho me aankhe dal ke maine aankho se kaha... "choda le ek baar, aisa gand marunga ki gand se pasena nikal jayega..."
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"DMT.."maine kaha..

"Sorry..."

"DMT... dimethyltry…. sorry, i forgot its full form but i think.. it is some kind of liquid..”aankh mijkar jamhayi lete hue maine kaha “produced naturally in pineal gland inside brain and in the absence of serotonin… actually, i dont have any idea, what the hell is this serotonin... all credit goes to 4.0. so in the absence of Serotonin… DMT fires the neurons.. which results in hallucinations and feeling of being separated, even visiting another reality... i mean, another universe.. and from my point of view.. DMT changes the mental channel, opening our minds to other planes of existence... “

“DMT… Dimethyltryptamine…" ye sunte hee pata nahi Angelina ko kya josh aaya… wo turant apni jagah se uthi aur fatak se bookshelf ki taraf gayi..

Wo bookshelf me dayi taraf.. bayi taraf… upar se neeche, neeche se upar kuch badbadate hue kuch dhoondhne lagi... wo is ek single word DMT se itna josh me thi.. jitna ki use Arman word sunkar hona chahiye tha... wo hadbadi me pura bookshelf upar se neeche.. neeche se upar.. baye se daye.. daye se baye.. sab check kar dali.. par wo jo chiz dhoondh rahi thi.. use wo nahi mila... wo ek baar mere taraf mudi aur phhir se shelf ko upar se neeche.. neeche se upar... baye se daye.. daye se baye.. khangal dala aur tabhi waha ujjar kapde pahne hue ek aadmi aaya...
.
"Angelina... chale.. we're gonna miss the movie"

"Doctor Boaz..?."us ujjar kapde pahne manav ko dekh kar maine kaha...

"No... i'm his assistant.. Angelina.. please.. time’s up"(another way)

"Time’s up..."stick zameen me tika kar main utha...

Waise toh mujhe, mere se bada ajeeb, khiska hua , satkela insaan koyi nahi lagta.. par DMT sunte hee Angelina ab jaisi harqat kar rahi thi... us-se wo ab kuch-kuch meri tarah hee lagne lagi thi.. wo kabhi mujhe dekhti toh.. toh kabhi Dr. Boaz ke assistant ko.. toh kabhi deewar me tangi ghadi ko... toh kabhi apne bookshelf ko.. pata nahi wo kya dhoondh rahi thi.. par mere dwara kahe gaye ek word DMT ne mano use aise uttejit kar diya tha.. jaise wo aaj tak isi talaash me thi... usne ek aur baar puri process repeat ki.. yani wahi.. bookshelf me upar se neeche.. daye se baye dekhne wali process...

"When will you come next time..? i'll rearrange my schedule and yes, you were right... i met you during camping."

Angelina ke is sawal aur is khulase par main apni sextillion dollar ki smile dete hue khada hua aur waha se jaate hue bola...

"I'll inform you about my next session... and you, 3-dimensional ordinary Assistant.. remember the word.. Arman.... This is the most sacred word of this world and by chanting it twice a day... your all sins will be forgiven and you'll go straight to the heaven.. now, get the out of my way.."

main waha se nikla aur thodi door jaane ke baad wapas palatkar, Angelina ke office ke bahar deewar khada ho gaya… ye check karne ke liye ki… mere jaane ke baad wo mere baare me kya baat karte hai… main kuch der wahi bahar khada raha…

“hatt lawda…. kuch baat hee nahi kar rahe ye toh… zaroor Angelina us assistant se chudwa rahi hogi… waise main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hu.. ladkiya toh mujhse aise hee pat jaye.."

langdate hue main waha se bahar jaane laga aur yahi dua kar raha tha ki wo assistant mujhe kahi maarne na aa jaye... warna self defence me mujhe etching needle seedhe uske dil me ghusani padegi...
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Angelina ke us khulase ne ki wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai.. mera sar ghuma diya tha.. mera matlab maine badi mushqil se kaha-kaha ka concept lagakar situation ko handle kiya tha aur ab wo bol rahi hai ki.. wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai, mujhse pahle bhi mil chuki hai par yaha sawal ye nahi hai... yaha sawal ye hai ki sawal kya hai…. kyunki main jitne sawalo ke jawab dhoondhata hoon, unke jawab milne se pahle yaa toh sawal badal jate hai ya darjano sawal aur jud jate hai.. i mean it becomes deeper.. and deeper and deeper... isliye pahle sawal toh clear ho jaye… jawab toh baad me dhoondh hee lunga…..

"Life is like Physics, 3.0... deeper you go, deeper it becomes and you know the simple concept of multiverse.. actually you invented it.. truth isn’t the truth.. lie isn’t the lie.."
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Multiverse... pata nahi ye kab aur kaise khatm hoga aur usse bhi jyada importance iska hai.. ki ye shuru kab hua... maine aasman ki taraf dekha.. aur dekhta hee raha, kyunki aas-paas mauzood logo se main irritate hone laga tha.. tabhi waha Nisha aayi aur mujhse boli...

"Why are you looking up at the sky..."

Memorial hospital se aane ke baad main apne room nahi gaya tha, balki seedhe yahi RVC ke park me aaya tha.. main kafi din baad yaha aaya tha, jis-se park thoda badla-badla sa lag raha tha…. pure park me jhat barabar launde idhar-udhar daud rahe the.. wahi kuch log jogging… toh kuch aise hee group banakar ghoom rahe the.. phhir waha kayi couples bhi the.. jo park ka kona-kona pakad kar baithe hue the... kuch khel premi waha badminton aur basketball khel rahe the... maine kuch der un anjaan laundo ko basketball khelte hue dekha.. jiske baad kuch-kuch mera bhi mann hua par tabhi mera hath mere bagal me rakhi stick par gaya.. jis-se maine apna ye vichar tyag diya aur....

"Why are you looking up at sky.. "

Usi samay Nisha achanak waha aayi aur ye sawal daag di… par…? yaha toh… yani is duniya me wo mujhse aise-kaise puchh sakti hai… yaha toh main us-se sirf do baar hee mila hoon… ek baar thane me aur ek baar aaj subah MBD Restaurant me…. maine park ke kayi pedo par aaj MBD Restaurant jaate waqt jo nishaan (A..) banaya tha unhe dekha… wo nishan ab bhi un pedo par tha… yaani main apni duniya me tha…. phhir ye… yaha… kaise……. zaroor, ye mujhe… i love you… bolne aayi hogi….

"Why are you looking up at sky.. "Nisha ne apna sawal dohraya…

"I'm all… rumbly in my tumbly...”

“sorry… kyaaa…”

“ i mean… my stomach is growling and i want to eat a pie."

" so, you’re looking for a pie in the sky…. lol..lol..lol… what a rhyming… pie in the sky…. lol… hahaha… hihihi… hahaha… lol.. lol”

“dekh ke… haste-haste mar mat jaana… ”

“well, you know… you never gonna get a pie in the sky…"

"i know.. but that's my desire… Eating a pie in the sky.. pie means… a good Life and sky means… a good world.. a good life in a good world…… I’m sure, there would be many good worlds…. anyway, why did you come here and where is your so-called fiance and your 3-dimensional ordinary friends.... "

"I felt very bad about what happened in MBD Restaurant.. sorry about that.. tumhe bahut bura laga hoga na.."

"Main bura nahi maanta...."

"Kyun..."

"You really want to know ?"septillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine Nisha ki taraf dekha aur phhir..

"I'm sorry too.. i shouldn't have told you all that.."mere kandhe me hath rakhkar David bola...

"Ye behanchod kaha se aa gaya.. aur mere kandhe me hath.. hath hata madarjaat... ye shri Arman ka kandha hai, teri maa ka pond nahi, jaha tera baap jab chahe hath maar de..."

"I said.. i'm sorry.."mera kandha thapthapate hue David muskuraya "actually maine kuch jyada hee overreact kiya us din, raat ko… police station me aur phhir MBD restaurant me.. "

"No worries.."

"Mere best friend Sonam ke boyfriend Nishad ka birthday hai.. tumhe aana chahiye, bahut maza aayega.. kyun, David.. David bhi tumse yahi bolna chahta hai.. kyun, David.."

"Ahhaan.. haa.. haa.. kyun nahi.. tumhe aana chahiye"thoda ladkhadate hue David bola..

"I know, where is it going and what'll be the end of it.. so it'll be better if i stay away from you…. because last time Sonam's boyfriend's birthday wasnt good enough………. for you and your friends.. and if i accept your invitation then history could repeat itself.. "

"Excuseeee meeee, i didn't underrrr..."

"Just trust me.. i've seen the future or you can call it, cross-universe fear transfer... or you can think like that….that i just rejected your friend request, because you’re not on my level….. so, bye.. ally"

"matlab kal yadi main bhi kamyab aadmi ban gaya toh mujhe bhi log aise hee dil aur dimag se sunenge... "

"Aur nahi toh kya... sara khel hee kamyabi ka hai, bidu... wo bhool jayenge ki tu wahi Arman hai.. jo nangayi choda karta tha. bewda, darua.. jaise prefix tere naam ke aage se hat jayenge aur yadi kisi ko tere purane kand yaad bhi rahe toh bhi kuch khas fark nahi padega... dekha kaise, baato hee baato me maine tujhe tera past change karne ki tarqeeb bata di aur tu kaha, kal puri raat time travel through wormhole ke baare me Sulabh Sauchalaya se bahas kar raha tha… chal, papa bol... "
.
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"Sir..."

"Kya hai behanchod..."jhatke se apni aankh kholte hue main badbadaya...

"Your order.."

"Thanks... par thanks kahe ka.. kaun sa tu mujhe free me serve kar raha hai... in fact tujhe toh ulta mujhe thanks kahna chahiye… chal thank you bol.."

Mere aas-paas rahne wale log aksar mujhe pata nahi kyun ghoorte rahte hai.. ab jaise MBD ka pura waiter samaj mujhe ghoor raha tha.. jiske baad maine waiter samaj ko apni trillion doller smile di.. aur chammach uthakar, extra pyaj lane ke liye kaha

"Maza aa gaya... bahut miss kiya samosa…”

Samosa khate-khate maine MBD restaurant me baithe bhookhe-nango ko dekha, jo 10 baje se hee muh faad kar yaha aa gaye the aur ek table me jakar…meri nazar atak gayi...

"Nisha aur David... badhia hai. Main bhi yadi Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ko Vipin bhaiya ke engagement ke dauran pata leta toh aaj main bhi uske sath kisi aise hee restaurant me baitha hota... upar se madharchod ka 28 lacs ka package... usi ke paise se usi ke saamne dusari maal patata..."

Samosa khate hue, Nisha ki taraf dekhte hue main Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ke baare me soch hee raha tha ki… achanak Nisha ne meri taraf apna hath hawa me uthakar ungaliya hawa me hilayi... yani mujhe hii... kaha.. jiske turant baad maine table ke ek kone me banaye A.. ko dekha ki kahi baithe-baithe toh main parallel universe me transfer nahi ho gaya... 

"A.. toh hai, phhir ye mujhe kyun hath dikha rahi hai... yaha toh main ise jaanta bhi nahi… matlab jaanta hoon, par naa ke barabar… "

Maine Nisha ko koyi response nahi diya… Jis par usne ek aur baar mujhe dekh kar ungaliya hawa me firayi... jispar maine ek aur baar apne banaye nishan…A… ko dekha aur….. Nisha aur uske agal-bagal me baithe logo ka jayja lene laga...

"Sali, mera mazak udane ki koshish kar rahi hai.. lagta hai. Yadi main responce dunga toh iska gang jo iske agal-bagal baitha hai mujhpar hasne lagenge... par main bhi inka baap hoon... ye mujhpar hase, us-se pahle main hee in par bematlab ka has deta hoon.. par nahi.. mujhe khud ko mature karna hai in chhote logo ko ignore karna hai.."

Maine Nisha ko koyi responce nahi diya, par is dauran Nisha ko barabar dekhta raha... bahut der tak dekhta raha aur aise aankh fad-fad kar aise dekha ki David waha se uthkar seedhe mere paas aane ko majboor ho gaya...

"Meri fiance ko kya dekh raha hai be, itni der se"

"Wo bhi toh mujhe itni der se dekh rahi hai.… itti der se" maine kaha aur samosa khatam karne ke baad jo chatni bachi thi use plate utha kar peene laga... "maza aa gaya bahinchod... maal dekhte hue samosa khane ka maza hee kuch aur hai..."

"Tune Nisha ko maal bola.. kyu be.."

"Maine sirf maal bola aur yaha bahut maal hai.. ho sakta hai ki main Nisha ke bagal wali ko maal bol raha hoon ya phhir uske bagal wali ko.. ya phhir uske bagal wali ko.. tu topic change mat kar.. topic Nisha ko tadne ka tha... Nisha ko maal bolne ka nahi…"

"Ahhha.. haa. Haan.. tu kyun dekh raha tha meri fiance ko.. aur ye mat bolna ki wo tujhe dekh rahi thi... kyunki wo tujhe nahi, balki tere peechhe baithe RVC me rahne wali Mrs. Arora ko dekh kar hiii.. kar rahi thi.."

"Mrs. Arora..."peechhe palatkar maine kaha.. "hii, Mrs. Arora aaannnd... ...Miss. Arora.. ?. right ?"

Jis par Mrs. Arora ke sath baithi Miss. Arora ne meri baat ka koyi jawab nahi diya... 

"Tu idhar dekh... udhar nahi..."mera sar pakad kar saamne apni taraf karte hue David bola...

"Seriously..? Tu mujhse sirf isliye ladna chahta hai, kyunki maine us taraf dekha jis taraf teri fiance baithi hui thi.. ? I mean, seriously...? Aur waise bhi main Nisha ko nahi, balki uske peechhe wala glass art dekh raha tha.. matlab kya banaya hai.. ekdum se guch-puch.. guch-puch kar diya do-teen rang ko.. par hum dono ko pata hai ki ye sach nahi hai.. naa toh main wo glass art dekh raha tha aur na hee Nisha Mrs. Arora se hii.. hello kar rahi thi... kyun ?"

"Par tune use pahle dekha.. galti teri hai.."

"Ab choot lawde me gire ya lawda choot me, chudna toh choot ko hee hai na... same concept aur Kya chutiyo ki tarah lad raha hai.. tu jaana bhai, apna kaam kar...."

"Behanchod langde... kya bola Nisha ke bare me..."mujhe maarne ke liye David ne apna hath uthaya aur usi samay mujhe andaza ho gaya ki ab aage kya hone wala hai... 

David waha isiliye aaya tha.. wo us raat ka badla lene aaya tha. Par mujhe ek baat ab tak samajh nahi aayi ki David, Varun/Nishad, Sonam mujhse pahli hee mulaqat me kyun nafrat karne lage.. unki pelayi toh parallel universe wale Arman ne ki thi... phhir kal raat pahli hee mulaqat me wo mujhpar kyu bhadak gaye ? Aur ye David.. sirf itni simple si baat par mujhse ladne kyun aa gaya...

"multiple selves can affect one another.. actually, they do... that's why sometimes we think that what's happening, is already happened before... that's why.. sometimes you see a unknown person walking on the road and that person seems good to you, you know nothing about him yet you start feeling good... you seem to like that person and on the contrary, sometimes you don't know a stranger yet you start hating that stranger for no reason "
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Maine David ka hath apni taraf aata dekh ethching needle nikala aur uske hatheli me ghusa diya.. David jor se chillaya aur mujhe gali bakte hue jor-jor se apna hath jhatkarne laga.. Nisha aur baki log bhi waha turant aaye... MBD ka pura staff meri taraf dauda.. is beech mere aas-paas baithe logo ne mujhe jabarjasti pakad kar uthaya aur wahi neeche dhakel kar, mujhe maarne lage.... 
.

"Par tune use pahle dekha.. galti teri hai.."

"The hell it is... what just happened..."

"Kya matlab tera..."

"Ye sab psychological baate hai, tu nahi samjhega..... oh my physics "apni quadrillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine kaha "grow up kiddo, ye jo tu aaj kar raha hai na.. wo sab karke main bahut aage badh chuka hoon aur ek golden tip…. yadi kisi ko marna ho toh us-se itni jyada baat nahi karte... "

"Dar gaya salaaa... langda...hahahaha...."bolkar David hasa aur uske hasne ke baad uske sathi bhi has pade... mujh par comment pass karne lage. Lekin maine kuch nahi kaha.. kuch nahi kiya...

kyunki main iska nateeza dekh chuka tha. Kyunki David , Nisha, Sonam & Gang ab wo David , Nisha, Sonam nahi the.. jo mujhse khauff khate the aur na hee ab main wo Arman tha… meri sharirik kamjoriyo ne mere hath baandh ke rakh diye the... khair… wo sab mera mazak banate rahe.. koyi langda bolta, toh koyi taklu.. toh koyi badaurat, toh koyi chor, toh koyi tapori... ek ladki ne toh behanchod lesbo tak bol diya... 

Main wo sab sunte hue dheere-dheere exit gate ki taraf badhta raha aur is dauran main… Nisha aur uske dosto ke bagal se bhi guzra.... toh Nisha muskurate hue boli

"I think, you ain't paying attention but my friend, Sonam just call you.. A lesbo .. Lol ... the way, last night... you were behaving in the police station, I did not think that you would be such a big coward.. guys, last night, he was fluttering in front of his inspector friend but now look at him.. "

Nisha ke ye katu vachan sunkar main bahar jate hue ruk gaya... maine 2-3 lambi saans peli aur phhir apni Quintillion dollar ki smile ke sath Nisha ke paas gaya.. paas matlab, ekdum paas... 

"Listen, rich..bitch.. deep down, we both know.. you like me more than David and You could not sleep that night because you were thinking about me. So, stop your silly showoff... because, if abusing or leg-pulling is an art then i'm the fucking Artist.."

Nisha ke baad main Nisha ke saheliyo ki taraf mukhatib hua... "and you all... 3-dimensional ordinary people... first raise your dimension, then raise your voice.... . "

.

"Toh aapko Doctor Angelina se milna hai.."apne computer par khat-khit khat-khit karte hue Memorial Hoapital ke reception me baithi laundiya boli "aur aapka name hai.. Shri Arman...... nice name... seems married... anyway, Dr. Angelina is on second floor... "

"Thank you for…. Spending… time… with… me..." jaate hue maine kaha.. jis par wo receptionist mujhe dekh kar thodi der tak muskurati rahi...

"Main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hoon.. ladkiya toh mujhse yun hee pat jaye..."
.

Mujhe samajh nahi aa raha tha ki main kya karu.. kya kahu. Main abhi uske saamne baitha tha jiske liye maine na jaane kitne universe ko paar karke aaya tha. Par haqiqat ye thi ki jiske liye main itne universe ko paar karke aaya tha.. wo mujhe nahi jaanti thi. Maine Angelina se andar aane ke liye thik usi tarah permission mangi, jaise school me ek bachcha class me andar aane ke liye permission mangta hai.. phhir maine couch me baithne ke liye bhi permission manga.. 
.

Angelina ka ye office kahne ko toh hospital me tha, par phhir bhi hospital ke mafiq kuch nahi tha. Waha ghar ke mafiq sofe the.. bookshelf tha.. exercise karne ke equipments.. traedmill vagerah the. Phhir meri nazar bookshelf ke baju me gayi.. jaha 3 alag-alag size ke microscope rakhe hue the.. jiske paas glass ki slide bhi thi... Angelina ka office itna bada aur aisa tha jaise mano Memorial hospital ke andar ek aur hospital tha.. matlab itna vishal... phhir meri nazar thoda aur door gayi, jaha ek bed tha aur uske aas-paas duniyabhar ki boring machines... par meri nazar deewar par likhe ek quotes par atki...

"Nothing human is alien to me..."

"Yeeeah... Yee mere type ki hai..."quote padhne ke baad maine khud se kaha aur ek-do aur quotes padhne ki liye maine deewar par aage nazar daudayi...

"When i look at the world, i'm Pessemistic but when i look at the people, i'm optimistic"

"Ye toh bilkul bhi meri tarah nahi hai..."
.

Main bahut der tak aise khamosh baitha raha, maine waha ki har ek chiz ko observe kiya 

"Ek ghante ke session me tumne aadha ghanta barbaad kar diya hai.. "chuppi todte hue Angelina boli..

"Oh sorry, Doc.. main Arman..."

"I know, who you are.. but what i dont know is why you are…………. here.."

"You're a doctor, i'm a patient... "

"Ohhhk.so, What do you think about the quotes written on the wall"

"I hate them... and that's why, i'm here... i hate everyone.. everything.. even that white pen in your table…. racist sala"

"And what about me. You hate me too..?"
.

Angelina ke is sawal par main ruka....

"keep nothing back... be straight up"
Par main ruka hee raha.. maine koyi jawab nahi diya..

"Come on, Arman... why on earth you're taking too much time to answer a simple question.. ? you hate me or not.. ? And please, tell the truth because i have 99 ways to know that.."

"You see, doc.. that's the problem here.. truth isn't the truth and lie isn't the lie... what will be your reaction...if i tell you that somehow i got the ability to go in another universe... how will you react if i tell you that i've already met you in another world and That is how, on that day outside of Barangi's house.. when I met you, I knew your name .. whatever I told you on that day, it was not all lies..."

"Okay..."

"Ye sach hai.. mere paas parallel universe me jaane ka channel hai.. par actual me main nahi jaata.. meri consciousness travel karti hai.."

"Ookay..."

"You dont trust me.."

"I do want to trust you.. But first , you tell me how you transfer your consciousness from one world to another... is it your some kind of genetic quality or you have any secret appliance. Like the one..in inception movie. If yes, then please show me."indirectly mera mazak udate hue Angelina boli.. 

Is session ke liye jab main apply kar raha tha tab hobby aur khali samay me main kya karta hoon.. iska ek column tha.. jaha maine... patti khelna, watching hollywood movies, tv series bhara tha.. aur yahi se point pakad kar Angelina ne abhi-abhi mujhpe tanj kasa tha... maine uski taraf dekha... wo ekdum serious thi.. matlab usne abhi just mera mazak udaya par ekdum serious thi.. maine ab use upar se neeche tak dekha aur bas dekhta raha.. bahut der tak dekhta raha.. is dauran wo bhi mujhe dekhti rahi.. usne mujhe ratti bhar bhi disturb nahi kiya... shayad wo mera dimag padh rahi thi.. ya phhir mujhe padh rahi thi... waise dono same hee hai… 

"Chodaaa leee.."Angelina ki aankho me aankhe dal ke maine aankho se kaha... "choda le ek baar, aisa gand marunga ki gand se pasena nikal jayega..."
.

"DMT.."maine kaha..

"Sorry..."

"DMT... dimethyltry…. sorry, i forgot its full form but i think.. it is some kind of liquid..”aankh mijkar jamhayi lete hue maine kaha “produced naturally in pineal gland inside brain and in the absence of serotonin… actually, i dont have any idea, what the hell is this serotonin... all credit goes to 4.0. so in the absence of Serotonin… DMT fires the neurons.. which results in hallucinations and feeling of being separated, even visiting another reality... i mean, another universe.. and from my point of view.. DMT changes the mental channel, opening our minds to other planes of existence... “

“DMT… Dimethyltryptamine…" ye sunte hee pata nahi Angelina ko kya josh aaya… wo turant apni jagah se uthi aur fatak se bookshelf ki taraf gayi..
 

Wo bookshelf me dayi taraf.. bayi taraf… upar se neeche, neeche se upar kuch badbadate hue kuch dhoondhne lagi... wo is ek single word DMT se itna josh me thi.. jitna ki use Arman word sunkar hona chahiye tha... wo hadbadi me pura bookshelf upar se neeche.. neeche se upar.. baye se daye.. daye se baye.. sab check kar dali.. par wo jo chiz dhoondh rahi thi.. use wo nahi mila... wo ek baar mere taraf mudi aur phhir se shelf ko upar se neeche.. neeche se upar... baye se daye.. daye se baye.. khangal dala aur tabhi waha ujjar kapde pahne hue ek aadmi aaya...
.
"Angelina... chale.. we're gonna miss the movie"

"Doctor Boaz..?."us ujjar kapde pahne manav ko dekh kar maine kaha...

"No... i'm his assistant.. Angelina.. please.. time’s up"(another way)

"Time’s up..."stick zameen me tika kar main utha...

Waise toh mujhe, mere se bada ajeeb, khiska hua , satkela insaan koyi nahi lagta.. par DMT sunte hee Angelina ab jaisi harqat kar rahi thi... us-se wo ab kuch-kuch meri tarah hee lagne lagi thi.. wo kabhi mujhe dekhti toh.. toh kabhi Dr. Boaz ke assistant ko.. toh kabhi deewar me tangi ghadi ko... toh kabhi apne bookshelf ko.. pata nahi wo kya dhoondh rahi thi.. par mere dwara kahe gaye ek word DMT ne mano use aise uttejit kar diya tha.. jaise wo aaj tak isi talaash me thi... usne ek aur baar puri process repeat ki.. yani wahi.. bookshelf me upar se neeche.. daye se baye dekhne wali process...

"When will you come next time..? i'll rearrange my schedule and yes, you were right... i met you during camping."

Angelina ke is sawal aur is khulase par main apni sextillion dollar ki smile dete hue khada hua aur waha se jaate hue bola...

"I'll inform you about my next session... and you, 3-dimensional ordinary Assistant.. remember the word.. Arman.... This is the most sacred word of this world and by chanting it twice a day... your all sins will be forgiven and you'll go straight to the heaven.. now, get the out of my way.."

main waha se nikla aur thodi door jaane ke baad wapas palatkar, Angelina ke office ke bahar deewar khada ho gaya… ye check karne ke liye ki… mere jaane ke baad wo mere baare me kya baat karte hai… main kuch der wahi bahar khada raha…

“hatt lawda…. kuch baat hee nahi kar rahe ye toh… zaroor Angelina us assistant se chudwa rahi hogi… waise main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hu.. ladkiya toh mujhse aise hee pat jaye.."

langdate hue main waha se bahar jaane laga aur yahi dua kar raha tha ki wo assistant mujhe kahi maarne na aa jaye... warna self defence me mujhe etching needle seedhe uske dil me ghusani padegi...
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Angelina ke us khulase ne ki wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai.. mera sar ghuma diya tha.. mera matlab maine badi mushqil se kaha-kaha ka concept lagakar situation ko handle kiya tha aur ab wo bol rahi hai ki.. wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai, mujhse pahle bhi mil chuki hai par yaha sawal ye nahi hai... yaha sawal ye hai ki sawal kya hai…. kyunki main jitne sawalo ke jawab dhoondhata hoon, unke jawab milne se pahle yaa toh sawal badal jate hai ya darjano sawal aur jud jate hai.. i mean it becomes deeper.. and deeper and deeper... isliye pahle sawal toh clear ho jaye… jawab toh baad me dhoondh hee lunga…..

"Life is like Physics, 3.0... deeper you go, deeper it becomes and you know the simple concept of multiverse.. actually you invented it.. truth isn’t the truth.. lie isn’t the lie.."
.

Multiverse... pata nahi ye kab aur kaise khatm hoga aur usse bhi jyada importance iska hai.. ki ye shuru kab hua... maine aasman ki taraf dekha.. aur dekhta hee raha, kyunki aas-paas mauzood logo se main irritate hone laga tha.. tabhi waha Nisha aayi aur mujhse boli...

"Why are you looking up at the sky..."

Memorial hospital se aane ke baad main apne room nahi gaya tha, balki seedhe yahi RVC ke park me aaya tha.. main kafi din baad yaha aaya tha, jis-se park thoda badla-badla sa lag raha tha…. pure park me jhat barabar launde idhar-udhar daud rahe the.. wahi kuch log jogging… toh kuch aise hee group banakar ghoom rahe the.. phhir waha kayi couples bhi the.. jo park ka kona-kona pakad kar baithe hue the... kuch khel premi waha badminton aur basketball khel rahe the... maine kuch der un anjaan laundo ko basketball khelte hue dekha.. jiske baad kuch-kuch mera bhi mann hua par tabhi mera hath mere bagal me rakhi stick par gaya.. jis-se maine apna ye vichar tyag diya aur....

"Why are you looking up at sky.. "

Usi samay Nisha achanak waha aayi aur ye sawal daag di… par…? yaha toh… yani is duniya me wo mujhse aise-kaise puchh sakti hai… yaha toh main us-se sirf do baar hee mila hoon… ek baar thane me aur ek baar aaj subah MBD Restaurant me…. maine park ke kayi pedo par aaj MBD Restaurant jaate waqt jo nishaan (A..) banaya tha unhe dekha… wo nishan ab bhi un pedo par tha… yaani main apni duniya me tha…. phhir ye… yaha… kaise……. zaroor, ye mujhe… i love you… bolne aayi hogi….

"Why are you looking up at sky.. "Nisha ne apna sawal dohraya…

"I'm all… rumbly in my tumbly...”

“sorry… kyaaa…”

“ i mean… my stomach is growling and i want to eat a pie."

" so, you’re looking for a pie in the sky…. lol..lol..lol… what a rhyming… pie in the sky…. lol… hahaha… hihihi… hahaha… lol.. lol”

“dekh ke… haste-haste mar mat jaana… ”

“well, you know… you never gonna get a pie in the sky…"

"i know.. but that's my desire… Eating a pie in the sky.. pie means… a good Life and sky means… a good world.. a good life in a good world…… I’m sure, there would be many good worlds…. anyway, why did you come here and where is your so-called fiance and your 3-dimensional ordinary friends.... "

"I felt very bad about what happened in MBD Restaurant.. sorry about that.. tumhe bahut bura laga hoga na.."

"Main bura nahi maanta...."

"Kyun..."

"You really want to know ?"septillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine Nisha ki taraf dekha aur phhir..

"I'm sorry too.. i shouldn't have told you all that.."mere kandhe me hath rakhkar David bola...

"Ye behanchod kaha se aa gaya.. aur mere kandhe me hath.. hath hata madarjaat... ye shri Arman ka kandha hai, teri maa ka pond nahi, jaha tera baap jab chahe hath maar de..."

"I said.. i'm sorry.."mera kandha thapthapate hue David muskuraya "actually maine kuch jyada hee overreact kiya us din, raat ko… police station me aur phhir MBD restaurant me.. "

"No worries.."

"Mere best friend Sonam ke boyfriend Nishad ka birthday hai.. tumhe aana chahiye, bahut maza aayega.. kyun, David.. David bhi tumse yahi bolna chahta hai.. kyun, David.."

"Ahhaan.. haa.. haa.. kyun nahi.. tumhe aana chahiye"thoda ladkhadate hue David bola..

"I know, where is it going and what'll be the end of it.. so it'll be better if i stay away from you…. because last time Sonam's boyfriend's birthday wasnt good enough………. for you and your friends.. and if i accept your invitation then history could repeat itself.. "

"Excuseeee meeee, i didn't underrrr..."

"Just trust me.. i've seen the future or you can call it, cross-universe fear transfer... or you can think like that….that i just rejected your friend request, because you’re not on my level….. so, bye.. ally"